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Is he interested or not????

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I met this guy about 6 months ago. We hung out at the bar that night and spent the night together but didn't sleep together. Well I didn't talk to him for a couple of weeks but he kept trying to get my phone number from my best friend but I told her not to give it to him because at the time I really didn't know him that well. Well a few weeks later I see him at this concert event and I go over to him and get his phone number. He calls me atleast everyday. Now things are more "serious" w/ us. I have recently been staying the night at his house every few nights for the past month now and we have had sex. The only thing is I told him that I really wasn't looking to date or have a serious relationship right now. And he was understanding about that. Well now when he calls it's always after 9 pm and then wants me to come over and spend the night w/ him. Is he just using me for a "friend w/ benefits" or is he only calling me later in the evening because he doesn't want me to think that he is pressuring me into having something more serious than I want. My feelings are strong for him and they grow everytime I get to spend time w/ him. He is very sweet to me and we can talk to each other for hours. I believe he likes me because his best friend works w/ my best friend and he told her that this guy never calls girls so whatever it is between us has to be somewhat serious and his best friend Vanessa says he talks about me all the time. I don't want to talk to him about because I don't want what is going on right now to change because I do like him a lot. What should I do??????

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Hey kharrell16

He could possibly be calling you that late because he knows you wont be busy, or because he may be calling from a cell phone and his minutes are free after 9. He could be giving you some space so you can go through your days with no distractions, another possiblity for the late calls.

To figure out about the "friends w/benefits" idea, think about everytime you 2 spend time together and ask yourself a few questions:

1.) Everytime you 2 are together are you getting physical in any way?

2.) Is he always the one initiating the physical contact?

3.) Have you ever had a night/ time together, since it started getting serious, where there wasn't anything really physical? (kissing, hugging, holding are fine...taking it farther than that would be physical).

So what I'm getting at is have a night or a few nights where you 2 aren't intimate or really physical with each other. It should help clear up and help you figure out if its just "friends w/benefits."

There is a great chance that since he does talk about you, call you and enjoys spending time with you, that he has feelings for you. But he may not know what to do because of your not wanting to be in a serious relationship.

Best of luck and I hope this helps a tiny bit.


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