Why Engagement Rings? What's the attraction other than marketting?

[Shiranai]

I always wondered about this... instead of getting a couple thousand dollars worth of a stone that can only resale at half or 1/3 or 1/10 the price, why not get it in cash or something usable?

 

Why not get it in the form of a down payment of a house or a car? I would much prefer a vacation, a trip, stocks, bonds, mutual fund account, a car, a house, a tempurpedic mattress, a laptop, a hdtv over a ring from Tiffany's. What's the attraction of stones that hardly sell for anything?

 

It boggles my mind that everyone knows diamonds are hardly worth anything and are only expensive because they are monopolized, but they buy it anyway. What's even more amusing is people spend so much money on them when they won't feed the poor or increase in value over the years. Isn't that bad investment?

[melrich]

It boggles my mind that everyone knows diamonds are hardly worth anything and are only expensive because they are monopolized,

 

Well that's not really true. Like gold, diamonds have a very structured market.

 

If you are serious about buying diamonds, do some research and buy them unset from a diamond wholesaler.

[Shiranai]

It's okay I'm not serious about buying diamonds. I doubt I will ever spend over $500 buying a stone. The more I think about it the less it's worth it. I would much much rather have it in stocks...

 

I buy stones on a whim and only if they look good and if I have money to throw into the drain.

 

I don't see how diamond's market's structured when 85% of the market is held in one family's hands.

 

... also, if I'm serious about buying diamonds, lol... I have more sources than an average person. I can get it cheap, custom made, with the highest quality, just like all the crystals and rubies and random stones that my parents got us for fun. What I don't get is why people don't just buy something useful instead.

[melrich]

I don't see how diamond's market's structured when 85% of the market is held in one family's hands.

 

It's extremely structured and in fact you can go onto wholesale websites that will give the going rate for a diamond according to size and quality. The rate will be "about" the same on every wholesale site around the world.

 

What you say is in part truth. Poor quality diamonds (mainly from India and mainly found in shopping mall jewllery outlets) are very common and worth very little. They are hugely marked up by retailers and if you turn around and try and sell them you'll get less than a third of what you paid for them.

 

High quality diamonds are different. They are rarer and if you buy from a wholesaler you should be able to sell for pretty much what you bought them for less the wholesaler's margin (which is far less than a retailers margin).

[Day_Walker]

Compared to a vehicle a diamond actually holds its value when you remember the 4 C's of judging the quality of a diamond. I agree that there is a huge market on diamonds because the stone itself isnt rare, in fact emeralds are the most rare stone but yet diamonds are worth more, yes that does have to do with the DeBeers monopoly but it also has to do with peoples demand for them. The diamond industry does a great job marketing its project, I dont know you will find a girl as sensible as yourself and be unwilling to for go getting a diamond. I am sure there are some girls out there like that but i dont know any.

[-Ophelia-]

I don't know why I'm starting to take purchasing diamonds much more seriously now. I totally agree with how the diamond indiustry monopolizes the market.

 

I don't know if this is off-topic but I've recently seen the movie Blood Diamond and it freaked me out to my very soul. It tackles the issue of how some companies purchase diamonds that aren't conflict-free in the sense that thousands of people die because of that. I never knew that there were civil wars in Africa just because of diamonds.

 

Now I'm not against diamonds and I am not judging those who purchase them. What I'm saying, in regards to the content of the movie and how it is based on a reality, we should start and be careful about the things we purchase and insist that they must be conflict-free. The same goes for coffee, cotton, etc etc.

[Liaka]

As far as the sentiment behind the "engagement" ring, it has more to do with symbolism for most people... the endless circle symbolizes endless love... Some girls just prefer larger stones and thereforeeee more money. Personally... not only do I have VERY small fingers, but I’m not a fan of huge rocks. A big rock just wouldn’t look right on my finger… My future husband should count his blessings!

 

I have also seen many different stones settings... not just diamonds... One of my professors had an onyx engagement ring and it was stunning.

[melrich]

I've recently seen the movie Blood Diamond

 

It's a good movie.

[Siriana]

Oh, it is possible to find a girl like that.

I would feel like a massive jerk knowing I wear 2000$ on my hand.

Maybe because I come where I come from, but I wouldn't dream about huge ring.

The more pompous the wedding, the less I believe in the outcome.

[kaoticbaby]

it's not the diamond itself, but the marketing surrounding it. especially since, at least where i'm from, a persons fiance is judged on the ring he gives you. isn't that horrible? if it's a small stone, then people think 'oh, he's cheap.' or 'he doesnt have a good job.' it's horrible, but people do think that. i myself could care less about actual diamonds, i love the small ones surrounding the main stone, but i rather have my main stone be sapphire or ...even better... amythist.

[spinstermanquee]

We got one ring and used it for both engagement and wedding. I didn't think it was practical to buy twice...

[Up and Down]

The diamond engagement ring did not become the standard it is considered today until after an extensive marketing campaign by link removed in the middle of the 20th century, which came to include one of the most famous advertising slogans of the 20th century: “A Diamond is Forever”.

 

I think there is way too much hype associated with how much a man loves you and the size of the ring. Its really actually annoying when I hear women talk down about the size of their ring. I also find it disturbing about how a woman would talk down about their man when they think the ring is too small. I once heard a woman say, "yeah I am going to talk to my man about watering this so it will grow". while I thought it was funny I also felt bad for him. The other issue I have is why is it that a woman gets an engagement ring and the man doesn't get anything? I am not saying he should but is it a bit archaeic in saying the woman is spoken for property. Almost like the man is marking his territory like a dog....OK I will step of my soap box.

[Batya33]

It's fine for you to prefer stocks to a diamond but not so fine for you to judge people who like nice jewelry, particularly an engagement ring. As far as the poster who mentioned a $2,000 ring, if that is like spending $200 or less for the person buying it, why put a price tag on what is "too" expensive? You can do the same analysis with cars, houses, and anything else that has luxury brands. Rather, I think that when it's time to decide on a ring (or "if") you do the percentage of your assets/income that seems reasonable, whether it's the two month's salary, less or more.

[anydaynow]

It's fine for you to prefer stocks to a diamond but not so fine for you to judge people who like nice jewelry, particularly an engagement ring. As far as the poster who mentioned a $2,000 ring, if that is like spending $200 or less for the person buying it, why put a price tag on what is "too" expensive? You can do the same analysis with cars, houses, and anything else that has luxury brands. Rather, I think that when it's time to decide on a ring (or "if") you do the percentage of your assets/income that seems reasonable, whether it's the two month's salary, less or more.

 

 

Hear hear, Batya!!! It has to do with priorities, and there's no reason to assume that people don't have your same priorities should be looked upon negatively. Live and let live. And on that note, Blood Diamond was a fine movie. It was an accurate picture of the way the market was before the Kimberley Process went into effect. It isn't like that anymore. I know for a fact my ring is certified and guaranteed conflict free, the fact that I own a diamond isn't hurting anyone, except maybe my bf's wallet. But that was his choice, I said a CZ was fine, he got me the real thing.

[Siriana]

As far as the poster who mentioned a $2,000 ring, if that is like spending $200 or less for the person buying it, why put a price tag on what is "too" expensive? .

 

 

Well I said I would feel like bla bla if I got bla bla.

So that means that this is the price range I find awfully expensive.

According to my standard.

 

So if I earn let's say 754$ (that was my apprentice salary per month).

2000$ is too much, but I know people who would do that.

Thats my idea.

[Batya33]

Well I said I would feel like bla bla if I got bla bla.

So that means that this is the price range I find awfully expensive.

According to my standard.

 

So if I earn let's say 754$ (that was my apprentice salary per month).

2000$ is too much, but I know people who would do that.

Thats my idea.

 

Well, no, what you wrote was "I would feel like a massive jerk knowing I wear 2000$ on my hand.

Maybe because I come where I come from, but I wouldn't dream about huge ring."

 

You did not say it was because you found that price range expensive as pertaining to your income. You also claimed that that would be a huge ring. It's all relative of course but if you look at $2,000 diamond rings they are small, not huge.

[Siriana]

Well I woul feel like a massive jerk.

I didn't say you need to feel like a massive jerk.

Huge= ironic

Quality of a diamond is not only about his size.

Yes I would feel like a greedy show off with a huge engagement ring.

I would never buy expencive ring and I would be stressed out if I got such ring.

I don't want it.

I...I don't care what other people want.

I wrote my opinon.

And I am tired of being politicaly correct all the time.

My opnons are not politicaly correct, ideal or not insulting all the time.

[Batya33]

Well I woul feel like a massive jerk.

I didn't say you need to feel like a massive jerk.

Huge= ironic

Quality of a diamond is not only about his size.

Yes I would feel like a greedy show off with a huge engagement ring.

I would never buy expencive ring and I would be stressed out if I got such ring.

I don't want it.

I...I don't care what other people want.

I wrote my opinon.

 

Yes you are entitled to your opinion and you did not express it clearly in the first place since you then said it had to do with your income. Obviously in this last post you clarified yet other things you wrote, so it's understandable that I would have misunderstood. Thanks for sharing.

[JadedStar]

I am of the mindset that the money used on a diamond ring is better spent elsewhere. I told my husband NOT to dare buy me some expensive diamond. I have a wedding ring with some diamanond baguettes that I love and it didn't cost a mint. I picked it out myself.

 

That money can be used elsewhere.

 

I know some women swear by their diamond and could never give up that tradition but to me it is friviolous, but then again I am not real big on jewelery. I know i'd have lost a diamond ring by now if i had one. Too much pressure!

 

Two months salary for a ring to wear on your finger is ridiculous in my opinion. Whatever floats your boat. I just know I wouldn't do it.

[RayKay]

I always wondered about this... instead of getting a couple thousand dollars worth of a stone that can only resale at half or 1/3 or 1/10 the price, why not get it in cash or something usable?

 

Why not get it in the form of a down payment of a house or a car? I would much prefer a vacation, a trip, stocks, bonds, mutual fund account, a car, a house, a tempurpedic mattress, a laptop, a hdtv over a ring from Tiffany's. What's the attraction of stones that hardly sell for anything?

 

It boggles my mind that everyone knows diamonds are hardly worth anything and are only expensive because they are monopolized, but they buy it anyway. What's even more amusing is people spend so much money on them when they won't feed the poor or increase in value over the years. Isn't that bad investment?

 

Well, I don't think most people buy an engagement ring with the plans of hocking it and trying to get cash back for it.

 

It is more about the symbolism, than the value. It is about the investment into your commitment/life together, which ideally should not decrease in value!

 

I know many people whom got something other than an engagement ring for their engagement (like a new titanium bike...I would be quite happy with that too!) but the idea is that for many, it is about the sign of commitment.

 

I don't get your comparison to increasing value or feeding the poor than given most of your other suggestions...a car or HDTV is not going to increase in value or feed the poor either!

 

Quality stones, as melrich pointed out, do not lose value. Most of the price is in the setting and you can buy loose stones and have it set for much cheaper. Poor quality stones however won't hold value well.

 

 

I am a rather simple kind of girl, a big rock would not fit my personality, or my own lifestyle at all (I am a very active/outdoorsy girl and a big rock would interfere with my biking gloves...LOL....). I would be quite fine without an engagement ring, or a very modest one - I actually prefer many other stones to diamonds as well and would be happy with something other than a diamond (I have known several women whom got other stones which were BEAUTIFUL rings). I actually have very little jewellery at all, so it would be kind of nice to have a nice ring as a sign of that promise to marry, whatever the stone. So while a big rock is not to my taste, nor is a diamond necessary for me, I certainly don't see the choice to invest in an engagement ring a "bad one" as long as you do what you can afford, and plan on investing emotionally into the marriage as well. Then you never need worry much about not being able to sell the ring for much.

[JadedStar]

I am a rather simple kind of girl, a big rock would not fit my personality, or my own lifestyle at all (I am a very active/outdoorsy girl and a rock would interfere).

 

My stance as well RayKay. HOnestly a diamond that is not flush with the band as in baguettes would get in my way. I am very outdoorsy much of the time. I love my wedding band of white gold and diamond baguettes and it never gets in my way.

 

It's really a personal preference. I do not judge people who want to go the diamond ring route. I do find it ridiculous tho for a young man (or old) when they really go into serious debt for a ring that is more than they can reasonably afford and especially when they are doing this because their girl is putting up some outlandish demands for one. I would be inclined to wonder what kind of frivolity will she have with money thru our lives.

[Siriana]

Saying to a woman thats a bad investment gives you a perfect warrancy you'll be yelled at and cursed ;-) than back talked to friends and family lol

Possibly left before engagemnts too. lol

 

I'd choose a nice trip not an engagement ring, since I don't want an engagement ring.

I want a nice completely pure white gold wedding ring.

[RayKay]

Yes I agree. I actually see some very pretty rings with smaller/flush stones as well, that I prefer. If I was to receive an engagement ring, I would rather have one I could wear along with my wedding ring, hence I would like a smaller one that was not so interfering and was comfortable.

 

As mentioned too, I see so many rings that are made with other stones (anything from emeralds, rubies, citrines, onyx, etc) that would be beautiful engagement rings - I am definitely not set on a diamond! Even if I were to receive a diamond, I would be more comfortable with a man-made or Canadian diamond, I am too leery of conflict diamonds.

 

I definitely disagree with going into massive debt for one. Particularly as for me, my partner and I share financial burdens already such as a mortgage, and that just would not seem right to either of us for him to take that on. I would never want him to spend more than he was comfortable with.

[fmjosie]

I want a ring, I will get a ring. My ring will be $1000 or less, so I don't think it's that big of a deal.

 

It's not a fricking investment, it's a symbol of your commitment & love!

[anydaynow]

Agreed. A ring is a nice symbol you can practically have on you all the time. That is the lure for me. I don't like the idea of getting engagement stock or bonds because that is, to me, more materialistic. Since it is fairly liquid, it would be like getting engagement cash. Nobody knows unless I tell them that my diamond ring is real. It is, and people assume this. But for all they know, the center stone could be the $15 CZ we had planned on! It doesn't matter if it was fake, because I enjoy it for what it symbolizes, not for what it cost or whether or not it will appreciate. I am a petite girl and my bf got me a very high quality smaller stone, and the style is very fitting to my tastes. I think big rocks look gaudy on me, but for some people they work. Just like engagement mutual funds might work for you, but to me they equate to a stack of cash, and that means nothing to me. I hate money! I only want it so I don't have to worry about it. And the more I have, the more I worry! I think somebody on ena was talking about an engagement dog. Whatever floats your boat!