Thoughts about the ex become ritualistic?

[Murasaki]

I've spent every day of the last four months (2 in NC after break up) thinking about my ex, but these days they aren't thoughts in particular, just her name and face. Is this still me dwelling on it, or have I been thinking about her for so long that there's still a basic imprint of her in my head every day? It's like a ritual at this point.

[JeckyllNHyde]

You aren't alone man. It's been 3 months since the break here for me and 1 month with NC. I think about her daily too. It oscillates between missing her and wanting her back, to hating her for the way she dumped me and things she has done since. Regardless, I think of her daily...and I want nothing more than to stop it. I want to forget what she looks like, how she felt, what we had together and most importantly: how she treated me over the 5 years we were together.

 

I am in the same boat. It's been more then a month Nc and I still think of him and wish he was around, his face, his name, etc. I can see myself being the same around 2 months NC, hopefully thinking a bit less, but still daily i expect. Your not alone man..

[NiceGuy76]

Its been over 8 months for me, it does it easier, but there has not been one single day yet...where I have not thought about her. I have tried everything too - from dating to going out with the boys and keeping active. There have been times this past couple months where I have written letters and NOT SENT THEM. I would really like to try and get a hold of her to see whats going on, but then I start thinking about the bad things she did, the type of person she is (for what she did) knowing that she ripped my heart out. Maybe someday I will send a letter, maybe I won't. The good thing is I have not tried to contact her for over 4 months (since she was supposedly getting married). I love her and do not know if that will ever go away. I am an idiot! LOL

 

Do not be like me...move on and better yourself...find someone that you deserve and someone that deserves you.

[Coyote9]

At 4.5 months out I feel much the same...like I'm in survival mode and have periods of hours where I'm not really thinking much about her at all, but then, when I'm feeling tired, lonely or stressed, her image becomes sharper again in my mind and I think back to how I felt 2 years ago as the relationship began. A lightness of heart then that equals the heaviness I have felt these months before and since the breakup.

 

While I accept she has not part in my life or my future, I haven't really moved ahead and embraced new dreams or hopes either. I'm grateful to be sleeping through the night, have gained my weight back that I lost, and feel more energy.

 

I may run into her tomorrow morning at a work related function. My plan is pleasant disregard, if that makes any sense. I have not reason to engage her in conversation and doubt she would inicitiate that anyway.