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Another hurdle to try to get over

bubblyblonde11

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bubblyblonde11 Collaborator

bubblyblonde11

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Ok tricky one....My team leader holds our team meetings in a hotel literally around the corner from my ex's flat and I mean the next road along about 30 secs in a car, handy when we were together nightmare now, this will be the first time back in that neighbourhood since the split.

 

Just had a panic attack cause got email announcing the meeting next Friday - I can't get out of it - but I don't want to go there I'm gonna be a wreck.

 

:sad:

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Benjyh Apprentice

Benjyh

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if you can try and not mix the 2 together, before you linked the team meetings with your ex. try and relax think of it as a team meeting in a hotel, which just coincedently is close to your ex's house. the chances of u bumping into each other is very slim.

 

everything will be ok just take deep breathes and relax

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papalazarou Community Regular

papalazarou

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I think this is a good thing - it will show you that you are making more of it than it is.

 

Thats a good point actually. Probably afterwards you will be like "dunno what all the fuss was about".

 

Plus its good to exorcise some demons, there were a few places I went with the ex and I was like "oh the last time I was here I was with her". However I have visited those times since so now I can say the last time I was here was with my good mate Darren or Ady etc etc

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JoeWho Community Regular

JoeWho

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Dont let certain places belong to your ex so to say. Take back all the places that you guys did things together. It only takes going to those places a couple times before you totally forget that wherever you are was even a special place for you and your ex.

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bubblyblonde11 Collaborator

bubblyblonde11

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Thankfully it is not a place I would normally frequent anyway as its not close to where I live. Like said it is another hurdle to cross, probably is a good one, just like most things sometimes the thought is actually worse than the actual event itself!

 

I shall put on my best suit, make sure I look my best and be brave. Stick two fingers up as I drive past the end of his road and hope I don't pass him in the car on his way to work but if I do I'll look my best and beaming with happiness (or pretend too anyways)

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Batya33 Grand Master

Batya33

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How about convincing yourself that moving on will have a positive impact on the dating you are trying to do? We can't control our feelings but we can control the reactions to our feelings. If you keep dwelling on this it will make it much harder for you to connect with others in a healthy way.

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summerpeach Contributor

summerpeach

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Oh I know that feeling. My sister lived a few streets over my from my ex AND he also lived on the same street as my friends.

After the break-up, I could not go to either of their houses.

It took me months to get over that.

Once you do it, you will think "Ah, that was nothing"

We give our ex's so much power.....TAKE THE POWER BACK!

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bubblyblonde11 Collaborator

bubblyblonde11

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Thats a good point actually. Probably afterwards you will be like "dunno what all the fuss was about".

 

Plus its good to exorcise some demons, there were a few places I went with the ex and I was like "oh the last time I was here I was with her". However I have visited those times since so now I can say the last time I was here was with my good mate Darren or Ady etc etc

 

Dont let certain places belong to your ex so to say. Take back all the places that you guys did things together. It only takes going to those places a couple times before you totally forget that wherever you are was even a special place for you and your ex.

 

How about convincing yourself that moving on will have a positive impact on the dating you are trying to do? We can't control our feelings but we can control the reactions to our feelings. If you keep dwelling on this it will make it much harder for you to connect with others in a healthy way.

 

Oh I know that feeling. My sister lived a few streets over my from my ex AND he also lived on the same street as my friends.

After the break-up, I could not go to either of their houses.

It took me months to get over that.

Once you do it, you will think "Ah, that was nothing"

We give our ex's so much power.....TAKE THE POWER BACK!

 

thank you. I will take back the power and use it as another step in the right direction.

xxx

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bubblyblonde11 Collaborator

bubblyblonde11

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Bubbly remember I managed to resist "popping" round to the ex flat when I was stranded at the station 2 mins where she lives for an hour!!!

 

I know hun, believe you me, I don't want to see him (G**ge) and most def will not be going anywhere near his place (apart from driving past the end of it as I have no choice in that part cause of location of the meeting).

 

I just worry too much about up and coming events, born worrier!!

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lunatic Mentor

lunatic

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Do feel sick, literally, just thinking about going there though, daft I know.

 

 

 

Well I can totally understand how being in the area of his place can evoke strong feelings and memories. Just do yourself a favor and when you start to dwell on him change those thoughts to what he did to you. All the lies he told you and how he made you feel insecure. He brought out the worst in you and now you can see what he did and how you reacted.

 

Go there with your chin held up high! Your an attractive woman once you sort out your feelings and insecurities you will have no problems finding a nice normal man. Hang in there and don't make this out to be more than it really is. Remember this is your insecurities getting the best of you and you can control that.

 

HANG IN THERE!!!!

 

Hub

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bubblyblonde11 Collaborator

bubblyblonde11

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Well I can totally understand how being in the area of his place can evoke strong feelings and memories. Just do yourself a favor and when you start to dwell on him change those thoughts to what he did to you. All the lies he told you and how he made you feel insecure. He brought out the worst in you and now you can see what he did and how you reacted.

 

Go there with your chin held up high! Your an attractive woman once you sort out your feelings and insecurities you will have no problems finding a nice normal man. Hang in there and don't make this out to be more than it really is. Remember this is your insecurities getting the best of you and you can control that.

 

HANG IN THERE!!!!

 

Hub

 

Everyone is right it is a minor detail and I can do this with total dignity and will go with my chin held high, in my dress to kill suit (not literally! ) lol

 

And laugh all the way to the hotel....even if I break when I get there which hopefully I will not.

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andy5128 Contributor

andy5128

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I know what you mean here, work arranged a night out the other week to a pub not far from my exes. Well gave it a miss as trying to avoid that area like the plague..!!

 

If during work I guess that is a bit more tricky, just do what you said Bubs and make sure you look the dogs danglies and feel great as that will help and borrow an Aston Martin where poss so you can whiz in and out very sharpish.. will lend you mine if you like.. I WISH...!

 

Oh and take a sick bag just in case..!!

 

You will be fine, have music on in car you like and just plan it so it will be as comfortable as poss...

 

Andy

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bubblyblonde11 Collaborator

bubblyblonde11

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I know what you mean here, work arranged a night out the other week to a pub not far from my exes. Well gave it a miss as trying to avoid that area like the plague..!!

 

If during work I guess that is a bit more tricky, just do what you said Bubs and make sure you look the dogs danglies and feel great as that will help and borrow an Aston Martin where poss so you can whiz in and out very sharpish.. will lend you mine if you like.. I WISH...!

 

Oh and take a sick bag just in case..!!

 

You will be fine, have music on in car you like and just plan it so it will be as comfortable as poss...

 

Andy

 

 

Ah thank you. Tough one but like it says just another hurdle to jump over. One will ensure one looks ones absolutely best, although I never leave the house without making myself look my best anyway

 

Cheers hunny

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andy5128 Contributor

andy5128

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I just looked how much it would cost to hire one!! LMAO

 

££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££'S

 

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HE ANI'T WORTH THE MONEY OR THE EFFORT,

 

although I AM tee hee hee hee

 

Bloomin Eck.... how much for a week and restricted mileage too... You could probably get a helicopter there for cheaper!!!

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