Looks,Money, or Personality

[Dougie_D]

When you are looking for a relationship, what are the qualities that drive you AWAY from someone?

 

I'm not attractive, I don't have a career when I should, and I don't know if I have a great personality.

It seems like you have to have two of these to at least land a relationship.

I've never been with one, so I'm trying to figure out my flaw.

I feel like I've failed in all three.

[Sweet Buttabean Jellayroll]

When you are looking for a relationship, what are the qualities that drive you AWAY from someone?

 

I'm not attractive, I don't have a career when I should, and I don't know if I have a great personality.

It seems like you have to have two of these to at least land a relationship.

I've never been with one, so I'm trying to figure out my flaw.

I feel like I've failed in all three.

 

are you llooking for a career? it takes some people longer in the career department everyone dosent get one at 22 fresh outta college it takes time.

 

your attractiveness and personailty is a mindstate you have too feel your personality is great

 

what do you do that makes you unique?

 

you must be confident too find a good person..........

[tmp0620]

To be honest, I think you only need one.

 

The thing that you (and me for that matter) may not have is the right attitude, and right amount of confidence.

 

The other stuff might make it easier.

[android12]

hmmm it depends on what kinda chick u want too. in general (and no im not generalising cos it differs per person) this will happen...

 

- if a girl is gonna go for someone who has more money then its not necessarily u shes fallen for - its the money (course not ALWAYS the case)

- if a girl is going for you for looks then shes pretty superficial

- if a girl is going for personality then any of the rest is a bonus...

 

i believe you should go for someone you have chemistry with etc unfortunetly how you present yourself is important as people see that FIRST which will lead to gettin to know your personality. now MANY MANY MANY guys who arnt attractive still get girls and its got to do with CONFIDENCE. like ppl have said before me..if your confident in who you are then you'll find someone...dont try to be someone your not by faking your personality to trying to win someone over with money

[Night Pumpkin]

What turns me off the most is a girl who spends too much money on herself.

 

Not to be a * * * * *, but I used to live in Africa and when one lives there one gets a good understanding of poverty. After having lived there for a while, I understand what it means to have nothing. Thus, I don't like girls who spend too much money on themselves. THat is the biggest turn off.

[JeckyllNHyde]

I agree with the poster who said that personality is what is most important and the other 2 are just bonusses.

However, people don't get to know your personality first in most cases. It's usually the superficial stuff that gets them interested in you.

 

I think your flaw may be thinking less of yourself. If you don't like yourself then how can you expect others to? When you like what you have to offer, people see that and believe it too when they see how you carry yourself.

 

Why not try listing them? Idea: jot down on a paper, all the good things you have to offer and all the things you don't like about yourself. It's time to get pro active . Then see how/if you can fix/improve the things you don't like. It won't happen right away but you need to work at it, it won't come to you.

 

You don't like your job? How about taking courses in something you do like.

Don't like your looks? See what you could do to improve that. Maybe some weightloss at the gym, healthier eating, new clothes (that helps alot), cool haircut. It won't change how you feel about your personality or career but it will sure help your in some way.

And personality? Give yourself props where you deserve it. Maybe your a really caring person? Funny? Honest? Etc. Those are all positive qualities to bring to the table.

[YabbaDabba]

Um, for me, it's only two of the three for me. Of course, I'm usually attracted by either looks or personality.

 

But if there are looks and no personality, that kind of kills it for me.

If there's personality but no looks, it really doesn't matter to me if I'm attracted to the guy's persona.

 

Money really doesn't matter to me that much, but I know it's really important to some girls. Both of my roommates say they probably wouldn't date a guy who doesn't have a car--although neither of them have cars. They're weird, typical, but weird, imo.

 

The money issue, though. I can deal with someone not being rich, as long as he's responsible. Meaning, if he has a so-called "dead end" job and wastes money frivolously, it wouldn't work out. But if he's not particularly well-off (financially, I mean), but is working to at least better himself or is responsible with his money, that's more attractive than the richest guy who doesn't know the value of a dollar.

[android12]

hmm another thing... i dunno abotu other girls but:

 

id rather be happy with someone and be broke, then be miserable but be rich. u need to connect/have chemistry to the person - money wont buy you love...or TRUE unmaterialistic happiness

[Day_Walker]

People can talk about personality all you want but personality doesnt insight passion or lust. Personality is something of long term concern, and perhaps even money but upon meeting a person looks will get you the furthest

[Gath]

looks matter to a degree, sure. need to find the other person attractive. well groomed and making an effort to be fit is about all thats generally required.

 

money is important to me in a way, not how much she has, but how she treats it. is she financially responsible. . . she doesn't hve to scrimp and save and pinch penneys, money is there to be spent to a degree. you should enjoy some of it now. but racking up massive credit card debt is very unatractive.

 

personality is very important. a gal could be rich and unbelievably hot, but if she isn't fun to be around, whats the point?

[strwberryshortcke]

hmm another thing... i dunno abotu other girls but:

 

id rather be happy with someone and be broke, then be miserable but be rich. u need to connect/have chemistry to the person - money wont buy you love...or TRUE unmaterialistic happiness

 

 

I whole-heartedly agree with this objective.

[fmjosie]

It seems like you have to have two of these to at least land a relationship.

That's kinda true! Girls don't (and shouldn't) settle for someone they don't like physically, or don't like their personalities....... and really, would you want to be with someone who's personality didn't mesh with yours? probably not!

 

Usually we will hold out for at LEAST 2/3. IMO, money isn't important as long as he has some kind of job/goals/school. If a girl won't date you unless you have money, then you don't want her. Gold digging wh0res are still out there, but no one should be with them. But looks & personality, 100% needed.

 

Looks.... well..... they really are subjective and there's always someone out there for everyone looks wise. If you think you'd be happier with yourself by improving your looks somehow, that will project out of you and attract more people.

 

Just in the last year for myself, I lost 25 pounds, cleared my skin & got braces. And I'm 27, so it's never too late! I was pretty attractive before but now, pow! I'm a fricking hottie! See, self improvement is great!