what to do?

[omusadon]

ok need some advice.... I met this girl about a month ago but when we met I was in a relationship and we never really talked... so about 3 weeks ago we started hanging out and talking alot after me and my ex broke up (didnt break up with one for the other).... so we start hanging out and kick it off really good.... i mean i date alot.... so i know what im looking for. I really like this girl and of course I let her know that im really into her and she said she feels the same way.... only bad thing is that she has a boyfriend... and shes not sure what to do... im not one to bug her or do the whole "choose me or him" thing so i dont hint or even get near that topic... but i did tell her i dont want to wait on the side while she thinks "well if me and my boyfriend break up i always have him" but part of me wants to wait im just impatient.... she says she doesnt feel her b/f cares for her as much as she cares for him... and they have only been going out for about 2 weeks...

 

so basically i need advice on what to do... my instincts are...

 

1. to just back off and stop hanging with her every day and let it play itself out

 

OR

 

2. Keep hanging with her and keep her interested

 

any questions or advice would be very helpful!

[Lily04]

hey, how old are you and how did you meet her? at work or a party or something? just curious... seems sort of odd that she's so serious w/her bf when they've only been going out 2 weeks, i'd say that it's still a fresh relationship and thereforeeee still pretty casual and up to her if she wants to break it off... I would def. tell her to pick between you two though if you do want to get more serious with her.

[servedcold]

Hi, welcome to ENA. If she's making a two week BF an issue, I'd fade out totally. If she is interested in you, the BF will miraculously and suddenly become a non-issue when she realizes you are moving on. No need for ultimatums, that's never the best way to start out. Best wishes.

[valenski]

Servedcold makes a good point. Maybe she is just not being straight with you, maybe she just likes hanging out with you and thats it but rather than say that she brings up this who do I chose thing. I say let things sort themselves out. "The water is clearer when to sand settles to the bottom."

 

Always proud of you. Vee.