How do you hang back and not get TOO excited or involved etc?

[schueysgirl]

Hi guys,

For those who dont know me from the breaking up thread i was with my ex for over 3 years. He finished me in may. Since then i havent been interested in anyone else at all. Just focused on me. Also altho i am social and see my friends I am not really a nightclub person so havent actually been in the environment to meet new guys etc. Which is cool I dont mind this

 

Anyway randomly the other day my friend and I went to a pub for a drink and we just started talking to these two nice guys. One of them (the one i thought was cute) asked for my number so I gave it him. He text me the next day just asking how I was and said we should meet up soon. And then the following day asked if i was free to meet him for a drink on saturday for a couple of hours in his break from work. I was really thrilled and excited because its been a looooooong time in fact i dont think I have EVER ACTUALLY DATED someone really. I mean when I was 16 i was with my first boyfriend for 2 years and then we split. And then i ended up with my ex about 4 months after that and we were together for about 4 years. And i already knew him as a friend so it wasnt even really "new" and "dating" lol.

 

Anyway! So i met this guy on saturday and he drove and we went for a nice drink. He said he would pick me up from my house but i said i would meet him at his work because i live down some loooooooong country lanes and its hard to describe to get to me. So i met him and work and he drove us to a pub we had a drink and he is really really nice. Completely different to ANYONE i have ever liked before and he is really sweet also. On the way back he asked whether I was going to show him where i lived so he knew so i did and it was all really good.

 

So the two hours we had obviously flew by and he said he was going to a wedding today (sunday) and his family are up monday but that he is free tuesday in his break from work and that he would see me soon. When i left the car he gave me a kiss on the cheek and it all went very well!!

 

What do you all think?

 

So anyway i am obviously happy but i dont want to get ahead of myself so I just wanted some tips on being cool and when to text etc and what kind of things to say because i have never ever done this before with someone i dont know...its much easier when you already know the person as a friend etc....i would like to see him tuesday in his break should i text him on monday and just casually see if he is still free??

 

thanks guys xxx

[wish4me]

Kind of in the same boat as you. Known this guy for a month and since i was new to the dating scene texting rather than calling and saying hi seemed kind of strange.

 

I guess I'm old fashioned and wait on them to call me but since he asked you about Tuesday you could send a text Monday evening and ask if he still wants to meet up with you.

 

I like you haven't been one for dating. I made the mistake of sleeping with this guy on the weekend and feel so bad about myself. Just take things slow and when the urge comes on to take things further think twice. Good Luck.

[Day_Walker]

Part of the process of learning how to respond to these situations is trial and error. You should always act like yourself in these situations otherwise whatever another person tells you wont listen to the advice. You seem to be doing fine now, just realize there is no need to rush, so take your time and make the decisions that you want to make since you will live with the consequences.

[schueysgirl]

Thanks for the advice guys I text some of my friends an awful lot (especially the ones who watch the f1 and bike racing!) so normally i would text a lot to them.However i dont want to be texting him too much so soon...so i havent text him today as i know he said he was at a wedding so prob busy with family and friends But in a way i do want to text him because i want to tell him how happy i am my fave driver won the race today....but i havent i figured i can tell him that if and when i see him again as he is a little bit interested in the racing but not much

 

Anyway i think i will send him a text tomorrow just to see if he is still free for those couple of hours on tuesday...

 

Its so difficult all this! i have never been here before i dont want him to think im TOO keen but i also dont want him to think i am not interested because i havent text him....and all my male friends are always telling me how much they hate sending text messages so they will never really send any first!!

 

SIGH this is so hard when you havent done this before...much easier when you know the guy as a friend first rather than basically a complete or near stranger!!!

[ghost69]

just text and say hey. it's so innocent. gets them talking. maybe they will ask you a question back. i wouldn't wait for them to contact you all the time. doesn't show much interest on your side if they have to contact you each time.