Any successful Break up only to reunite LDR??

[milesaway]

Just curious. I was in a LDR for the last 9 months. I lived on the east coast and she on the west coast. We did see each other often being that I am retired and she would olso come east for long weekends. We broke up about a month ago. We never fought...my problem was i was never able to express my feelings...ie tell her how much I love her. That coupled with the LDR she felt like she needed to terminate it. She told me that she loves me so much and that I am one of the most important people in her life. Since the break up I have realized my mistakes and thought about it long and hard and told her I will move to her so we could be closer. I told her how much I love her. Seems to me that she has moved on and even continued dating. I am the king of procrastinators!! Any successfull LDR reconciliations??

[tiredofvampires]

I know I cannot answer the question you put here, because mine ended sadly, we were just as far apart...neither of us could move easily, but I would have done the alternate visits for as long as it took to make it work. It ended for a myriad of reasons, and I am still mourning.

 

I'm sorry yours ended too...and have to wonder, if she hadn't terminated it, would you still be into this relationship? Or is this a "don't know what you've got 'til it's gone" sort of thing? Sometimes not having someone anymore and their moving on triggers a lot of anxiety and a sudden jolt out of desperation, but does that mean it is love, or the relationship you are ultimately seeking -- and would that inability to express your feelings spill over into other areas of your life and being demonstrative in general? Inability to express feelings often isn't limited to ONE thing, it's a large area of behavior and communication.

 

Also, even though a little off topic...how did you two meet? Did you "meet" long distance (as I did, over the internet), and if so, how long before you really met in person?

[milesaway]

We met while we were both on vacation. We then immediately started visiting each other.

[Captain34]

i had an ldr end in may because the distance increased over the summer and we couldnt see each other the whole time. she said she wanted to try again 3 months down the road. now its three months down the road and i found out she is back.

 

who should make contact here? i feel like she is trying to make me jealous..

[milesaway]

Captain, maybe you should reach out to her if you want things to work out.

[monkey1]

did she say that she doesn't want to try having a relationship with you? if not, then i would respect her decision. it's difficult being in a ldr, i know because i'm in one.

 

i also think that the thing is you have to prove to her that you've changed, or at least acknowledge your mistakes and do something about it so it won't happen again.

[trying hard to understand]

"Any successful breakup only to reunite LDR?"

 

i just got in contact with my ex who had left me about 1.5 months ago. We were in a LDR. Went a month with out actually talking to each other. Wrote some letters back and forth. Talked to him on the phone for an hour the other night. We decided we need to see each other one more time face to face to truly decide if the sparks are dead and gone. He knows I still love him and I have no clue what he feels for me now. He said he was afraid of leading me on and the LDR wasn't helping matters. However, he missed me. So, we have a weekend planned for the end of Sep. (only time we are both able to travel). I will let you know if it a weekend of reuniting the LDR or a final goodbye.

 

From the outside, I would have to question why you procrastinated expressing your feelings for her. What was holding you back?

[milesaway]

My occupation. In my feeble mind I percieved showing emotion as a sign of weakness. God I miss her so much!!