workplace drama

[dtgrl812]

Ok.... so I am a woman in the workplace and I have been having issues w/ another woman here....long story; short.... I have let a lot of crap w/ her fly because of the whole "queen bee" theory of the workplace. I have been told now by by bosses that this theory does not hold any water, because they are aware she is "abusing her power". They talked to her about it--- but she feels that they are "threatened by her being a woman"-- nevermind the fact that the man hired her and that the other boss is a woman!!!

 

Anyways, the bosses also told me that this woman is in no way my superior. They said that they are "working on this situation". In the mean time I have a work project that I am the manager of...this woman is on my team. she is already telling me what to do and how to handle things. One of my bosses told me that if the woman says ANYTHING to me I am suppose to ignore her or REMIND her that I am the head project manager... i don't know if I have the balls to do this. This woman thinks she knows everything and that she does everything right. I guess her performance overall is up to snuff.... she just is constantly stepping over bounds with her responsibilties and with how she treats superiors and equals. Last week she even overstepped her boundries w/ one of our bosses. I believe my bosses let some of this stuff go for awhile because they felt it was "passion".... but now they are aware of it and how bad it has become.

 

I am not sure what to do ... one of my bosses recommend I keep a journal of this and the other one suggested I just be blunt with the woman when she tries to boss me around. I, being a woman, am all about woman progressing in the work place.... this woman does need to take a chill pill tho-

[Tethys]

If you are the project manager on this particular project, do not hesitate to let her know this. It sounds as though all of your superiors "know" the situation with her (though I do not). Why not put her in her place then? Just asking.

 

(This is why I left the corporate world, lol!)

[DN]

Give her an order over something to do with the project. If she says anything other than OK then simply say that as your bosses have put you in charge of the project that she should talk to them if she has any problems with doing as she is told by you and if she doesn't want to talk to them then she should comply. Say it as a flat statement without emotion and don't engage in an argument. If she tries to argue just refer her to your bosses and walk away.

 

Keep this strictly business-like and professional.

[dtgrl812]

my bosses have told me i need to be "more ballsy" and "stand up" for myself

[itsallgrand]

Haha. I'm in a similar situation. Except he is a male.

 

We've come to an understanding, I think. Oh, he still is who he is, but now there is more mumbling and less out and out trying to be bossy to me.

 

Your bosses are exactly right. Just stand up to her and don't worry about it.

Do your job, make sure she is aware of hers, and then let her dig her own grave.

 

Some people seem to me to get a big chunk of their sense of identity from their role at work. I think of them as Petty Dictators. Kinda sad, really.

With whatever little bit of power or authority they get, they use it to club people around and try to gain some control out of the world.

 

Work on not being bothered by her. That's the only thing that can cause you troubles. Don't let her rattle your cage. Watch her...learn about her...

 

It's not worth getting worked up about, is it? Just remember that.

 

Perhaps I find it easier because I don't subscribe to the "we have to manage others" philosophy at all. Just self management.