Should I trust him?

[Drunk]

A few weeks ago I found out my boyfriend of over a year was on an online dating website. I asked him about it and he said he just likes to talk to people and he never meets anyone. Then I caught him red handed trying to meet a girl he met online at a bar. We talked it out and he said he will delete his dating account. A week or so later I found out he was posting ads on craigs list personals.

I do believe it when he says he has never cheated on me. We are in a very loving relationship, and although it is long distance it has been great up to a few months or weeks ago, and it is not just due to a trust issue.

He has changed since I first met him, and not for the better. I sat him down the other day and told him I was still having trouble trusting him and about how i feel he has changed. I do love him, and i want to trust him. I just get this feeling though all the time that he is hiding something from me. Should I trust him? An dhow do I regain my trust for him?

[Tethys]

Whoah, sorry, he is not trustworthy. Maintaining a dating profile while you were together? Trying to meet up with another girl? And when you found out about the dating profile, he switched to posting on Craigslist???

 

Should you trust him? Short answer -- NO. I also wouldn't be that confident that he hasn't cheated. I mean, wow, sounds like he was TRYING, so you can never know.

 

I also wonder what you mean by he has changed since you met him and not for the better. This doesn't sound good at all.

[mizz_sweety]

I completely agree with Tethys, sounds as though ur mans a playa, maybe he does love you and yes he probably does care about you, however there are too many men in life who have all that they could ever want or need but are greedy and want more - sounds as though ur bf is like that.

 

I know its hard and you don't want to believe it but Tethys is right, he did TRY to meet up with the girl, besides if he just wanted to "chat to people" maybe he should have gone on a normal chatroom rather than a "dating site"

[beth116]

I'm afraid this doesn't look good for him at all. You are obviously a confident and loving person to be so objective about this, but I feel from his actions that he is being incredibly selfish, and maybe the long-distance thing is not worth the effort. You want a man who will stay true to you no matter how far away you are. If I were in your situation I would tell him he can have all the online dating accounts he wants, because he's as of now, free and single!

 

Girls deserve better than that!

[Daligal83]

In order to maintain a long distance relationship (well any relationship, but long distance in particular), you have to some a high level of trust. You just can't have that with this guy because of his actions. Maybe he hasn't cheated on you yet, but he's definitely on his way. How could he possibly think that craigslist personal ads are any better? If he's having that much trouble making friends, he can take up a class or join a club. That is just completely unacceptable. I think it's time to move on.

[RayKay]

We are in a very loving relationship

 

I had to read this a few times, as it seemed so out of place with the context of your post.

 

Does "loving" in your mind encompass someone whom maintains dating profiles, tries to MEET with them, lies about it, and then puts up MORE profiles?

 

He is taking you for a ride, and so far you are letting him. Stop it.

 

If he really wanted to meet new friends, it would not be on a dating/personals site! People don't go there for "friends".

 

This guy has "bad news" written all over him; not surprising you cannot trust him.