fivespot Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 My first thought was originally to just ignore her birthday all together, but I don't want to come off as being cold. I've always been the nice guy, but now I want to show her what an a$$**** I can be. It doesn't have to be long, just something short and "sour" ha ha ha and right to the point, just to acknowledge her birthday. See, we've been trying to stay friends for months now. It's been rocky, but as long as she didn't have a bf, I was cool. Now that she's seeing someone else, I find myself extremely jealous. I need to send her something completely out of character for me so she knows this is the final nail in the coffin and will probably be the last text i send her. Thanks. Link to comment
servedcold Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 Silence is better than any nasty text. Whatever you do, take some time before any action, you seem to be in a bad place right now and may need to chill out some. Link to comment
BornToResist Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 Hmmm. "I'm a jerk so don't bother wasting your time talking to me"...? How's that? Link to comment
jerk chicken Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 That is really immature and will show her that u actually care enough to make an effort to try and piss her off, what is the point? Link to comment
fivespot Posted August 20, 2007 Author Share Posted August 20, 2007 She already knows I care about her, and honestly she gets pissed off easily. Maybe I am in a bad place right now, but all I want to do right now is make her feel just as bad as I feel...and I know a nasty text on her birthday will do just that. I care about her to a point...but about the whole thing...I don't care anymore. And I don't care if she or her friends or anyone else thinks I'm an a$$**** Link to comment
jul-els Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 "Broken hearts are for a$$holes" - Frank Zappa If you really want to be cold, then the coldest thing you could do is nothing at all. Don't give her (or at least don't let her know she has) that power over you. Keep your cool, my friend. Link to comment
jettison Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 That is really immature and will show her that u actually care enough to make an effort to try and piss her off, what is the point? I agree with jerk. Getting that angry will only show her just exactly how much you still care. So if that's your aim, then by all means get nasty. Link to comment
fivespot Posted August 20, 2007 Author Share Posted August 20, 2007 Well basically she's expecting something nice from me for her birthday...a call in a nice cheery voice, a sweet text, etc. I suppose completely ignoring her will send the message accross. But I sort of thought doing nothing might be worse than sending something nasty. At least she'd have something to talk about with a nasty text. Link to comment
servedcold Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 A scenario: She is hanging with the new guy on her birthday. He has just given her a nice present. Your nasty text chimes in. She says, "hey take a look at the psycho I was stupid enough to date," then shows him the text. They both laugh uproariously and continue on with whatever they were doing. In her mind, she decides to do a truly impeccable servicing on the new guy that evening to spite you... recommend again... silencio. Link to comment
bigheart09 Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 Not saying anything is the best way to show her you dont care anymore. It means you didnt even give her birthday a second thought. Link to comment
fivespot Posted August 20, 2007 Author Share Posted August 20, 2007 she decides to do a truly impeccable servicing on the new guy that evening to spite you... recommend again... silencio. I see what you're saying...I really do. But the thing is that's going to happen anyway--if I call her and be nice like a sap, if I ignore her, or if I send her something nasty--the worst part is its going to happen anyway!!!. That's what I'm so pissed off about. She completely gave up on us for practically no reason at all. That's why I don't care anymore. There's nothing I can do to change anything. I guess I just want to go out with a bang...not literally, of course. Link to comment
annie24 Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 My first thought was originally to just ignore her birthday all together, but I don't want to come off as being cold. I've always been the nice guy, but now I want to show her what an a$$**** I can be. It doesn't have to be long, just something short and "sour" ha ha ha and right to the point, just to acknowledge her birthday. See, we've been trying to stay friends for months now. It's been rocky, but as long as she didn't have a bf, I was cool. Now that she's seeing someone else, I find myself extremely jealous. I need to send her something completely out of character for me so she knows this is the final nail in the coffin and will probably be the last text i send her. Thanks. Why do you think this is a good idea? Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 You do care. Or else this wouldn't be bothering you and you wouldn't be trying to hurt her. But it's OK that you care! It just makes you human. I'd even say that it's OK that you want to send that text. But sending the text...that is NOT OK. You'll feel better for about 5 minutes and then feel like an idiot and regret sending it. I can tell that you're very angry about the whole situation. Why don't you write out a letter to her that you don't ever send. Just get it all out. I know it sounds dumb, but it really helps. If you really feel the need to make some contact with her on her birthday, just send her a text that says happy birthday. That way you're not calling her and being all cheerful, but you're not being a jerk either. Take the high road. Link to comment
fivespot Posted August 20, 2007 Author Share Posted August 20, 2007 Why do you think this is a good idea? To let her know how angry I am and how I don't want her friendship anymore Link to comment
Hope75 Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 How old are you? What would you think if someone did that to you? Link to comment
servedcold Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 But the thing is that's going to happen anyway--if I call her and be nice like a sap, if I ignore her, or if I send her something nasty--the worst part is its going to happen anyway!!!. It's not ignoring if you just don't contact her; it's only ignoring if she contacts you and you ignore it. Seriously, after much experience, I regret the very few nasty things I've ever said to exes more than any other actions in relationships over the years. Best wishes. Link to comment
annie24 Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 To let her know how angry I am and how I don't want her friendship anymore in that case, silence is better. taking the time to text her (even if it is to be rude) shows that you care. As opposed to "I couldn't pull myself away from my super fun busy life for 15 seconds to send you a text." I think silence makes far more of an impact. I've never written an angry letter to someone I didn't care about. Link to comment
fivespot Posted August 20, 2007 Author Share Posted August 20, 2007 How old are you? What would you think if someone did that to you? Old enough. Believe me, if I did to someone everything she's done to me, I'd say I probably deserved it. Link to comment
servedcold Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 Well if you must, maybe "Happy Birthday! for your birthday I made a $5 donation in your name to the American Red Cross and added you to their mailing list! Best wishes." OK, just kidding, you should be silent... Link to comment
melrich Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 I'm another vote for staying silent. If you send her a nasty message I am pretty sure I know what will happen to it. It will get copied to everyone she knows and all of a sudden you are the bad guy in all this. I get the feelings you have but in this case I think you should act rationally rather than emotionally. Link to comment
fivespot Posted August 20, 2007 Author Share Posted August 20, 2007 Well, this is actually pretty funny. I think this is probably the fastest I've ever gotten replies on one of my posts on ENA before!!! Ha ha ha. So far, 100% of the posts tell me to do nothing, and honestly this is exactly what I was looking for...some kind of direction. Two pages of posters all saying the same thing probably aren't wrong. You just have to know how frustrated I've become about the whole thing. Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 fivespot...what do you think it's really going to accomplish? Will sending that text erase everything she's done to you? It's just going to make YOU look like the bad guy in the end. I don't think you want that. The best way to show her that you are angry and you don't want her friendship is to just cut her out and move on with your life. Being happy is the best revenge. Link to comment
annie24 Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 hey, I understand! lol, 3 pages of ENA posters can't be wrong! i would spend the day doing something good for yourself, get your mind of your ex. go watch a movie you want to see or call some friends and go to a restuarant. do something fun. it will be tomorrow before you know it and you will be happy you didn't text. Link to comment
fivespot Posted August 20, 2007 Author Share Posted August 20, 2007 I know for a fact she's going to call me if I do nothing, and to me, I feel like it will make me look worse if I ignore her call. I dunno...sending something mean seemed like the easy way out. So what should I tell her? Believe me, we've been going in circles for months and I'm just fed up now. So, the next question. Ignore her call when she calls wondering why I haven't called/texted her? Or answer it? What do I say that hasn't already been said??? Link to comment
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