sunfirechick Posted October 8, 2003 Posted October 8, 2003 Hey guys. I'm new to the site and have already found a ton of helpful articles and replys to others' posts, so I am sure someone out there must have some comforting words for me! My boyfriend and I have only been together for a couple of months, most of which I have been 4hrs away at school anyways. He is leaving next week to live overseas for 5 months. It has already been decided that we will stay together and try to build our relationship even with the distance. He is a really great catch and I have never had someone treat me with such love and respect. I really want this to work but I am worried that because our relationship is still very fresh, it will be too easy for us to drift apart. I don't know if that makes any sense. I miss him already and I want him to come back from his trip and have our relationship going strong. Is this possible? What can I do to hang on to this amazing guy? Thanks in advance!
enadevoli Posted October 8, 2003 Posted October 8, 2003 im sorry to hear about this... that would be soo hard to be away from your bf for that long. my bf lives an hour away at school & i thought only seeing him once a week was hard enough. i have learned that absense makes the heart grow fonder. you will build up so much love & you will miss him soo much (sorry to worry you, but you will miss him a lot, but thats not a bad thing, at least you have him to miss!) that when you see him again you will be soo happy. is there anyway to write notes to each other? that would definalty help keep your relationship on track. it is possible to have keep a relationship when you are apart for soo long.... heres a story... back in the day when my grandparents first got married, well like a month later, my grandpa had to go to war (WW2)... my grandparents of course wrote to each other, but then my grandpa got captured by the japanese, so my grandma was told that he was missing in action. she thought he was dead, but still had hope... like 2 years later, she found out he was captured. they didn't have contact to each other for almost 4 whole years & they were still soo in love when he returned home.... i know this isn't really what you are going through, but i find that story so amazing, that my grandma & grandpa got through that. if you & your bf are meant to get through this, you will.
no6 Posted October 8, 2003 Posted October 8, 2003 How does your boyfriend feel about this? Has he got the same fears? If not then it is important to face the worse case scenario and try to accept it in any way you can. If he does feel the same then you don't have to worry unduly because you will both be committed to making a long distance relationship work. There are a number of things you can do to bring romance and spark into the relationship from afar, have a look at the appropriate sections on this web site. The good news is that 5 months is really not a long time and it will be an excellent experience for you both to grow an appreciation of each others character and not be clouded by the physical aspects in a relationship. Why did I answer your question? For over 2 years I had a long distance relationship and got to know my partner very well, to love them for who they are. What happened?….we got married! Don't worry and good luck.
Happy_Go_Lucky_Heb Posted October 8, 2003 Posted October 8, 2003 Hey. First up, I'd like to welcome you to enotalone on behalf of everyone. I'm sure u've taken a nice step towards finding support and advice from many people of various ages from around the world which will be around for a while. Sunfirechick, I'd recomment you not to worry, and this is only the beginning, the less you see him, chances are, the more you'll worry and its natural to be and most likely you could get insecure about things. All i can really say is, it could really work out, and I'm in a semi-similar situation right now and I too am afraid of drifting but I believe I'm just wasting my time worrying, I should do something about it, like think about the special one in my life or plan somethin for her e.g. surprise, package, etc etc, something to occupy your time while thinking of him... Hope that helped a bit Happy Heb
bananaman3773 Posted October 9, 2003 Posted October 9, 2003 Well if you really love each other this wont be a problem. Just keep in touch and DO NOT even think about going out with another guy.
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