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ok guys and gals,

first off, this is my first time back after like 6 months, so im happy this is still around, well my problem is this..........

in grade 10 i met a girl, from the moment i saw her i knew i wanted to marry her it was crazy!! well i spent 2 years chasing her, and finally at the end of grade 12 i got her! i was soooo happy, our relationship went on fro about a YEAR, and it was awsome, there were some problems, main one being htat her parents didnt apporve since i was not white, but she roughed it out and stuck with me. well about the time of the year coming around, she broke it off cuz i was not the one she wanted to marry, this was soo harsh on my, it was as if my world was blown up! well we tried to be friends but that didnt work we eneded up having sex, and still holding hands, the love was still there, but she knew she couldnt marry me cuz of a gut instict, and i respected that, so we stopped talking since it was soo hard for us, well then its been 8 months, and i havent spoken to her for like 3 months, but i still think about her, and see cars like hers and miss her, its been fricken 8 months whats wrong with me!!! well i saw her today at the college and it was sooo hard we said hi and that was it, this was the girl that i shared everythign with, the one i thought i was going t omarry, and now its just hello, how do i move on?? will i ever? my friends are getting annoyed with my talk about her and how its effecting me still, is this normal?? i should have moved on!! well she now is dating some 26 yr old guy, (we both are 19) and they have already had sex after 10 dates, and that just grosses me out, and i dont know...even knowing hse has moved on hasnt really effected my love for her... i know im 90 % there, will that 10% ever go away, i wish it does, i cant handle her having so much control in my life she is my weekness, help out guys, please responde, dont just close the window, thanks


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The only thing I can say man is let her go, stop talking to her completely! She has obvioulsy moved on, so dont let her stop you from doing the same and possibly meeting the next girl of your dreams. I thought 4 months ago when my ex dumped for another dude my life was completely over. Well here I am actually in shape, got a decent chest with some bigger arms, accepted into the California Highway Patrol Academy, and I have girls left and right wanting to date me for ME for a change. I never thought I would ever want to fall in love again but believe it or not I can actually say that I became the stronger person out of all of this. It made it hard to stay friends with my ex and frankly, she didnt deserve my friendship the way she dumped me. She regrets it now because she sees how strong I really am without her and that is what she likes in a man. She likes a guy who is dependent on themselves, then she tranforms them to be dependent on her. Then she dumps them and when they reverse back to taking care of themselves, she wants them back. I know that sounds confusing but she really was messed up in the head and played alot of games with me. I do think about her alot but I tell myself I am doing better without her. I think once you realize there are other chics out there that are better you will get over her. Thats what it took for me! Honestly you just need to hang out with friends for a while then start meeting new girls. It really does boost your confidence and it puts your ex in the rear view mirror for while! So just stop talking to her, as much as she may call or email you, you have to stay strong and dont give in. If you do, the process will start all over again and you will never heal. Ive been there done that trust me. Dont play any of her "I miss you games" because once she sees that you are strong she will probably try to chase you again. Its all a game to girls trust me. It sounds like she has you wrapped around her little finger and she knows it. Now its time for you to throw the ball in her court and show her you have the courage to date like she has too. Even if you arent ready to date yet that is fine, just get out and meet new people. This is the first step to recovery and will lead to the to a healed heart. It will take a lot of time, and there will be tough days, but if you can get through them, the weeks can only get better! Avoid doing things you and your ex used to do until you have fully healed. Once you have healed then you can say that "ya I had fun with her, but it didnt work out, but I enjoyed her company and it was just a learning experience." Good luck man,,, I get a lot of people PM me about things like this so feel free to talk to me if you want. I have had alot of problems with ex's so I know what im talking about.



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