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Attracting girls and complications


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Hi, I guess I'll start off by stating my problem(s) and get a little more into details...


I guess my main problem is just attracting girls in general. But even when I do, either they won't admit it or they think about their reputation or what other people might think and start to have second thoughts so nothing ever hits off in the first place.


Let me give you a description of myself real quick here. I'm 15 years old, 16 in a month. I wear my hair messy/semi-spiked, color is blondish, dark brown. I lift weights regularly (have been since 6th grade) and I'm pretty built. I play varsity soccer for school in the fall, indoor soccer in the winter, track in the spring, and soccer over the summer as well so I'm in really good shape. I'm in my second year of highschool. I also go to a private school which I think may be one problem contributing to this. I meet alot of the girls I like through school, but I think most of them worry too much about their image and stuff to admit they like me if they do. (which I kind of doubt) I mean I have moderate acne on my face, and if you ask me I don't think I'm very attractive face-wise. I also lead a bent kind of lifestyle, listening to punk rock, hard rock, heavy metal music, wear baggy pants, getting average grades in school because I'm too lazy to care about doing the best I can. (but then again average in private schools is like straight A's in public schools) and I'm pretty well known in my highschool because of how athletic, quiet, and nice I am. I'm into alot of that dumb humor no one gets because the whole point of it is that there is no point.. which alot of people don't get and think I'm just stupid. I guess I don't really care much what other people think about me though, I'm very happy with my lifestyle other than the fact that I don't have a girlfriend and I'm not the most attractive person. It just feels like something is missing without having someone there to love and hold once in a while. And not just one of those best friends in a girl thing where you get hugs and shit for feeling down and stuff because I have alot of those already, what I'm looking for is someone thats interested in having a relationship. I just can't figure out why girls aren't attracted to me.. and even if they are why won't they just tell me? I make it pretty obvious that I like them... One of the freshman this year I had made a move on already and she decided that she just wanted to be friends but you know, I keep that channel open with her just in case she ever changes her mind because I really see her as the ideal girlfriend, perfect in every way.


So enough of my pointless blabbering... Is there anything I could do to attract girls more? I kills me not having a relationship.

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Wow! It seems like you have pretty much everything in common with me.


It seems like you're on the right track, making a move on girls you like - but don't get stuck on them. It feels good to have a crush, and it's fun to think about what might happen. But if in the end you ask and get turned down, it's okay. Don't sit around and wait for this girl to come to you again. She probably won't. But don't let it get you down. It's okay to feel sad or disappointed for a day or so after something like that happens, but after that you should try your best to bounce back up.


There's not much else you can do. Unfortunately, high school is not the best place to meet girls. This is even more so the case because you're in a private high school, which tends to have a smaller available pool. The good news is this: If you keep going out of your way to meet people, it gets easier and easier every time, until you don't even have to think about it. Even if you get rejected, all it does is make you get more used to it.


Just keep in mind that you're a great guy - you obviously know it, and I can imagine you must be a rare person just from reading your post. I know it's not much consolation as it doesn't help you _now_, but you'll meet just the right girl one day. You just have to hold onto yourself until then.

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I completely agree! In high school, girls are slightly immature and self-conscious so they place their image above most things. You are young, and you seem like a good guy with a good head on his shoulders. The right girl who sees beyond the physical will come around, and you will be glad you didnt waste your time and emotions on the others!


Just stay true to yourself, and everything else will fall into place.

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