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About Me

  1. I would like to hear your thought, guys and gals, if you would ever take back a former boyfriend, or girlfriend that cheated on you. If not, why and if so, under what circumstances?
  2. Hi guys, I don't really do these thread things but I have been reading a lot of them lately. So basically me and my childhood sweetheart broke up about 3 months ago. I'm now 22 and was with her for 7 years! We loved each other and did everything, travelled and talked about marraige and our kids. I got on brilliantly with her family as I was practically raised there. She broke up with me. She is in a tough course in college and it was coming near her exams so she stressed. I gave her space because I knew how hard the exams were and how much pressure she put herself under. Her reasons for breaking up was that she needs to see who she is outside of the relationship and that she was having doubts. She thought it wasn't fair continuing the relationship if she wasn't 100% commited. She said then that she could be making the biggest mistake of her life. She said to me that she wasnt sure about her decision. We both cried and hugged it out. No nasty words or anything like that. I cared for her too much. Anyways fast forward two weeks no contact at all (hardest thing I've ever done) she texts me seeing how I was? We exchange texts then the next night we slept together. We both knew it was a bad idea but I have no regrets of that night. We met up the following day and made an agreement that we should not talk to each other. Again both of us crying. It doesn't make sense cause when we are together it feels natural and easy (we both said that not just me). Fast forward 2 weeks and we met up once cause she was having family issues. I was there for her (no sex or kissing). We meet up then once more after this about 2 and half weeks later as she was leaving for 5 weeks. She said that she will have time to think about everything. She wanted to have sex with me then but I refused. We laughed it off and hugged goodbye. I said "so I guess we go back to not talking Again?" She replied "do you really think this is the last time we will talk?" Looking me in the eye. This was about 3 weeks ago and I can't stop thinking about her. She sees all my Instagram stories and Snapchat stories? I don't know what to do. She was my best friend and I'm not being an here but we had a great relationship, no cheating no violence 100% trust. I treated her like queen so much so that her mother would make fun of all the things I do for her? I've been doing relatively well regards no contact, better than her but I'm struggling She still has a few weeks left away from me... should I move on or wait for a text?
  3. Do you ever believe, that years down the line, more mature, older, wiser... two young loves can reconnect and live happily ever after? All the advice here seems to be cut out, block... but what, if two people are just meant to be?
  4. Hi All! After reading so much about doing NC, how many of you had an ex come back to you after they've seen that you've become a different, albeit, happier person again after they've been out of your life for a while or a long time? I'm asking because my friend, Julie, is going thru this. We were out recently and we saw her ex at a lounge we like to go to. She has not seen this guy or talked to him in five years. She was totally lost for a while after they broke up. She did all the pining and whining and crying when they broke up, but then she finally employed the NC method and she got him out of her system for good. She's a much better person and a lot of fun to be around. When we saw her ex, it was a big surprise to both of us. She knew that she would never hear from him again and she had totally moved on. Anyway, they hugged like old friends when they saw each other and we all talked for a long time that night. Anyway, she called me the other day and said that he'd been in contact with her. They did exhange phone numbers, but she said she never had intentions of really calling. She just did it as a polite gesture. This is true. She has a nice guy that she is seeing. And she talks about Dave constantly! Anyway, Julie said that her ex, Paul, has called her once a day since she's seen him. She said the conversations are light and very on the surface, but she can tell that there are some other things he wants to say, but she quickly tells him that she needs to go or that she's busy. I told her not to be surprised if he suggests that they talk serious at some point. But she says that she is totally over Paul and that things would never be the same between them, so she could care less about their past. But I think whatever he wants to say to her, is piquing her curiosity, at least mine anyway! She said that she doesn't mind being friends with him, though. But that's it. She LOVES her Dave! I'll have to keep everyone posted on this "developing story," but has some thing like this ever happened to anyone here? Let's talk! Tribecagirl
  5. My ex finally returned my phone call and has agreed to meet with me next week. I have not seen him in 3 months and have only spoken to him twice since the break up so there has been plenty of NC and time to heal. Of course like most of you I am hopng that at some point in time there may be a reconciliation. If nothing less I think it will provide closure but as I said I would prefer a second chance. What is the best way for me to handle this so it might lead in the direction I am hoping?
  6. Hello and thank you for letting me seek advice from you all. I appreciate any and all input I may receive regarding my situation. I'll try to keep this short and to the point. I have been in a relationship of one year with my gf. For the most part, we have got along great and never really fought, other than petty issues that every couple has. About 6 months into our relationship, my girlfriend started to lose interest in any form of sexual intimacy - basically we haven't had sex in over 6 months. I understand sex isn't the corner stone of a healthy relationship but I didn't realize how much a relationship can lack without it. In order to try and help my gf out, I began seeking out ways of naturally lowing my libido (taking supplements, no fap (which actually made urges worse), and a few other things that really messed with my emotions. I slowly realized that it's normal for a 25 yo male to have a healthy sex drive, and trying to lower that was damaging my body, so I quit ignoring my urges. Fast forward to the situation - I have made a grave mistake, an indiscretion that I do not think I can rectify for a long time. Over thanksgiving break, I decided to go out with some friends to drink and let loose for a little bit.. except I drank entirely too much (about 4/5 of a handle of liquor and half a bottle of wine) and I ended up cheating on my gf. The sexual release that I craved so much was not worth the emotionally agony once I had came to my sense and realized what I had done. I have violated the sanctity of my relationship and I am such a piece of and would never wish this kind of pain on my worse enemy. I messed up. There is no going back, only forward. I cannot believe I allowed myself to make such a vile decision, despite being pretty drunk and I cannot look myself in the mirror. I have been to counseling for this, and have more sessions (about once every week) to try to wrack my brain around this and take accountability for my actions. My girlfriend does not currently know but I owe it to tell her the truth and give her the option of continuing this relationship. I am hoping to eventually bring her to one of my sessions within the month so I can admit what I've done in a professional environment, with the hopes that she'll offer me a second chance if I demonstrate true remorse. I am truly remorseful, I have never been so disgusted for doing something ever in my entire life. I was wondering if anyone has ever heard of or experienced any success stories of getting a second chance after infidelity. I am truly a disgusting person but I don't necessarily believe in "once a cheater, always a cheater." I think I've been scared straight and I want to commit to being the best boyfriend towards my girlfriend for the rest of our relationship. I was also wondering if you think disclosing this information in a therapist's office is also a good idea? My therapist has told me that reconciliation is indeed possible if both partners want to work on what caused the cheating in the first place - make no mistake, I am no victim, my girlfriend is the victim in this circumstance. I just hope I have another shot at this relationship... I am truly sorry for my actions.
  7. I have been dating someone the last 2.5 months and one night (before date 9) a friend questioned what kind of man he was because he had to run to work for a moment before meeting us but didn't tell me and it sent me into a negative/suspicious frame of mind about the person i was dating for absolutely no reason (yes we were at the bar at the time, so alcohol clouds judgement) Long story short, i was a bit weird/tough around him that night and expelled a few feelings prematurely (I said i knew what i was looking for in general, not sure about him specifically, not too bad) On date 10 I apologized him for surprising him, it was unfair. At no point had i expected a reply. He said thats ok and actually he likes it (honesty i guess) I should have left it right there. BUT, I then i went on to say I am always excited to meet up and hoped he was on the same page and generally was still giving out insecure vibes/looking for reassurance when we were not at that stage. The next day, I sent the dreaded thank you text as i realized i had not said thank you for dinner the previous eve, but then regretted it when i realized it was just too much, my vibe was still stuck. Things kind of took a turn after this and the contact has become more infrequent (just taking longer to reply to text). Ive given him space, which i think of as a time to take space for myself, and think about my behavior, what triggered it and when, and thought about his in comparison. My investment became lopsided and ive taken some time to practice mindfulness, which is a new concept for me. After that comment my friend made, my energy shifted from going with the flow, to worrying about what kind of man he might be, worrying about if hes into me rather than thinking about if HE is right for ME, enjoying the moment and mirroring investment into the pre-relationship. Classic dating error arising from anxiety about "where this is going" I guess. What id really like now is to take a big step back, and start over in my mind so to speak. As far as the next date goes, he told me when he was free, and i picked a day but in the eve rather than day and im waiting on a reply that that is ok or not...I feel like hes fading if not gone as he has not confirmed yet. I wonder if you were on the receiving end of my temporary insanity, would you give me a second chance to slow things down? Should I even mention my error or will that come off needy? I don't want to seem like I'm constantly apologizing. I am a bit of an anxious person and it perplexes me to even write this. I do have a lot going on in my life and its not the end of the world if I don't get a second chance, but I do like him, and I do realize that i jumped the gun and i feel like a fool for letting it happen. I just hope i can have the chance of giving it a better shot by being true to myself and not getting caught in my own head.
  8. Me and my ex that I met at work have been broken up for almost 4 months. NC the whole time except him texting me a week after my bday(a month after our break up) to apologize for not wishing me a happy birthday which I accepted. Since then we've somewhat become friends again. We started off as friends, until I confessed to him I had a small crush on one of his close friends & in exchange he admitted his feelings for me. In the past I have felt that although I never acted on those feelings and they passed, it might've been a factor in our breakup. He gave me fluff reasons like "it's not the right time" and "I can't give you what you deserve" because I asked him to spend more time with me. We would hang out every 2-3 weeks and we're in the same place of work!!! Extremely frustrating. He also wasn't the best at communicating. Granted he had just got his 1st apartment, juggled work and class, and is only a sophomore in college but still, it sucked. He has started showing up to every event he knows I'll be at & hovering and staring all night, trying to use a mutual friend to drop hints (he's not over me, he made a mistake, he's not seeing anyone else, he's sad and confused), trying to get me to go to one of his house parties but never has the balls to invite me himself (so I always decline). Finally NYE he threw one and snap chatted me an invite. It caught me off guard completely. Our mutual friend was badgering me to go so I went, I'm not sure what I was expecting. Maybe more closure. But it was a tame night despite him being really drunk, pacing back and forth and acting weird to the point where our friend pointed it out, and he was constantly asking me if I was having a good time and making piercing eye contact, at which point I left without saying goodbye because I felt awkward. A couple days later I see him again after work at the bar me and my friends always go to. He usually doesn't come unless there's an actual event but this time he did. He stood so close to me when we got there and stared so hard even my friends were uncomfortable. He did make an effort to converse with me about random things but again we weren't alone. He always hugs me when he sees me or hugs me goodbye. My question is: how can I find out how he feels or what's going on without freaking him out? I can tell he wants to get something off his chest but we are never alone together and we don't communicate via text. He is very scared of communicating and just insecure in general. How can I find out his intentions so that we can have a shot at reconciliation or at least a real friendship again where there's not all this tension underlying everything? Please please help. Thank you so much
  9. The Monster Inside All those times I made our failure To succeed in love your fault it was mine All those I shunned as heartless All along the fault was mine I committed upon you the worst imaginable I abandoned you and made you to be in the wrong Somehow drawing a sick twisted pleasure from your pain I could not control the monster inside Sadly you were not the only one Not the first nor the last To feel the pain only I would inflict With my cold cruel means I let anger cost me my first chance to be human And let pride cost me my precious second chance I scorned others when the fault was in fact mine But now I see the monster inside I want to cage this monster and lock it away But fear that once he is gone nothing will remain This body will be but an empty shell Of what was once inside I am at a loss for how to accomplish my task To continue to let him loose would do innumerable harm To those innocents who do not deserve that pain But to end it with finality would do much the same My Angel of Epiphany has shown me that I am the monster inside
  10. sensual, mystical girl your memory lingers in the embroidered fabric of dreams passionate images, warming words of love i awoke from death only to fall back asleep after a brief spell of ecstasy peculiar how a twist of fate brought us together: a simple exchange of words and advice, a short question leading to camaraderie among us a lost soul reaches out and opens trusting judgement and emotion like never before countless evenings exchanging thoughts and hope impatiently awaiting for replies i could not have imagined the hold of your incredible powers i was sure we would never part the vision of what could be, what should be growing and reaching towards the sun a second chance at what i had lost years prior a decade of struggle, words on paper, dreaming in black the realization of never again experiencing what i had wanted so badly caught again in between raindrops, footsteps merging at the fork in the road a delicate struggle to hold on forever tainted by truth once again, forever divided by miscalculation promises of obligations betrayed by smiling green eyes endless memories of bliss wiped away by the foolish movement of hands i dare to light the candle to forever carry in my heart the eternal thought of what could have been our dream together-love, free, proud and pure... i wish you would have meant it.
  11. My heart is hurting beyond words So much so that I cannot feel Cut my skin open with swords To let the center spill out of the peel I can never be loved for I am tainted, No one will see beyond what I did, No more the beauty you had painted, Accepting that loving me you forbid. I cannot blame you for how you think, I was a fool to believe in second chances, I will pray for you, a pretty lady in pink, For you to love and give your romances. Love S
  12. You hear about alot of ex's getting a second chance with their mate, but what are the odds you will get a third chance...say 1 year and a half after the second chance. And the ex is hinting that "maybe someday we will get back together" instead of, "No way will we ever get back together!"
  13. Long story short I just learned that a woman I have been long attracted to, a woman who I can still remember vividly the day I met, who I can tell you how much she struck me with her beauty, grace, and soul (mostly soul) on the first day I met her; is getting a separation from her husband. I don't know the reasons, but her happiness is paramount to me; and I am having a heck of a time going between excited for having a potential second chance and feeling awful that she is not content with her life. I do want to go and seek her out, and maybe get some closure or maybe reconnect with the woman I have long held a light for. i am scared out of my wits and yet determined to press on Regardless in trying to reopen the lines of communication. I do not want to be a rebound, but i cannot afford to wait silently by for my own sake.
  14. What's the best way to fix a relationship if you get a second chance? Can people change and avoid the mistakes that ruined their relationship the first time? Can anyone recommend some books or youtube videos on the subject? In my case I did not have both feet in the first time, I held back because I thought she was too chubby for me, two of her three kids were really annoying, She didn't get along great with one of my daughters, she could be bossy and demanding, at times I was lazy, argumentive, grouchy and drank too much. We're still good friends and I'd really like a second chance. I've cut back significantly on my drinking, exercise a lot more, realize I'd love her no matter what size she is, realize most kids are a pain, but they'll grow up, I've gotten rid of being lazy and I'm working on being less selfish and less grouchy. I started taking lexipro which seems to put me in a better mood.
  15. "Dan" and I had been dating for 14 months or so when I decided I needed a break; my dad is terminally ill and I had just changed careers so life was quite overwhelming and I just wanted to focus on me and my family. During the 2.5 month break, Dan and I were lightly in touch and very civil but we mostly did our own thing. I did miss him while we were apart since we always had a lot of fun just doing things together but I did notice that I wasn't dependent on him for emotional support. During our relationship, there were a couple incidents where I felt emotionally unsafe when we fought (he would raise his voice, swear, and keep repeating things over and over again) and there were also some incidents that didn't involve me (either strangers or coworkers or his family) that were also concerning about how he dealt with his emotions. It also did not help that he would be more prone to anger or irritation when he took his ADD medication, so many little things could set him off. As a result, I kind of closed myself off to him emotionally which didn't help our relationship. Last weekend he took a 3-day self-help course (basically, intensive therapy) to help him look inward and get to the root of his anger issues. On his way home, his car got a flat near my house and stopped by while waiting for the tow vehicle. We talked and I was very impressed with how much work he was doing on improving himself. He brought up potentially getting back together but I'm not sure how I feel quite yet. I know he very much wants me in his life and has said/shown me in several ways. What do you guys think? How should I proceed?
  16. We've been broken up for 2 months now, dated for 10 months, but were good friends for a few years before this. He broke up with me because we had a rocky month. I made a mistake and did something that hurt him, but was genuinely sorry and remorseful but we had trouble communicating how we were feeling. I didn't know how to fix things, became a little more insecure because he was withdrawing and he stopped prioritising the relationship and stopped trying to work things out. I maintained no contact for around 6-7 weeks and then reached out and met up to apologise for the things that I did wrong, and explained how I saw things, and told him I recognised what went wrong and I told him that I think we could fix it and work on it now that we have a better understanding. But he's stubborn and doesn't really want to try again, he's the type of person who is happy to be by himself and doesn't really engage in romantic relationships often (I was his first GF/romantic connection of any kind - he's 23). He initiated contact during Xmas/NY break, was really friendly, lots of emojis etc, but we haven't since spoken. We're not the type to say mean things to each other so there's no anger or hatred. I still love him and wish that we could have a second chance to try fix things. I understand that he doesn't really want this anymore, but a part of me is hoping that he's just trying to convince himself it was the right decision and that with more time, he might change his mind. Should I try maintain friendly conversation to try stay relevant and maybe try to reconnect and show him that I have changed and that I am willing to really work things out?
  17. I’ve been here since who knows how long and the more I mature the more I understand that none of the posts apply to my situation. The responses from the people helping may not be wrong to a particular situation but they may not always be right as no one can predict the future. Chances are they’re right, in the moment, for those who don’t realize their real problem (not the mistakes they made, but why they made their mistakes). They all happened to be right in the moment for me, but my recent situation brings me back to one, 6 years back, where I just got a temporary solution to my heart break, but not a real solution to prevent it from happening again. That was on me as I now realize. For a couple to reconcile, it has to be natural. Essentially, they would have to cross paths as practically strangers that grew from their experiences with each other, as well as any other experiences they have faced in between, and even before they met. When I say grew I don’t mean, in terms of, they quit gambling because someone else didn’t like it, but because they realized why THEY gambled, why it affected THEM in a negative way, and why THEY should stop. (I’m not a gambler, it’s just an example.) Until that point there should be no contact by happenstance, or initiated by either party. Any form of contact before then would be to fill a void and to distract the gambler to forget to learn their lesson. Eventually it lead to the same issues that caused the people to split. Now, after the gambler stops gambling, for no other reason but their own good, there may be an chance for reconciliation, but there is also a chance for a beginning with someone new. Is it safe to assume that if the old love has not reached out, there is no reason to reach out to them? Backstory We met on a dating site and live an hour apart, and we have no mutual friends. I can do that again with someone new, except I have to deal with my “gambling” first. I’ll be ok either way but I would love to increase my chances of meeting her again when I’m ready, as friends or as potential lovers. This girl really changed my whole perception of life and I hate thinking that I will never get to at the very least, thank her. I’m not blocked, didn’t beg, didn’t do any of that. No toxicity, arguments, and no second chances. (The first significant one gave me a second chance. She probably should have followed most of the advice on here, if were being honest.) Before, Id give in to clinging on for hope or looking for similar stories, but now I’m clinging on to change because I realized there is a pattern since my childhood, which I was following with good intentions, that really lead me much further away from my true desires. I know I can thank her by not bothering her and letting her live her life (I bet someone will quote this and turn it bold) and I agree. To love someone to me, means to help them pursue their growth using their own free will, and she saw that the struggle between her growth and her desire to be with me would cause her to get frustrated and she left. Truth is, our goals for growth are the same I just need to work on my path. There is also this possibility that she will have obstacles to face that she was not aware of, much like what I’m doing now. So now, I realize I really love her which brings me between a rock and a hard place and leaves me scared that she’ll never know how much she has affected me. She said “I love you” to me once first, but stopped mid sentence. She is more mature than me and i realize the girl from 6 years ago was more mature than me then. This isn’t just a break up, it’s the biggest wake up call I’ve ever had in my life. Everything I thought I knew, is irrelevant. I think it’s one of those that most never have. I’ve sent out an email to my parents family and close friends that I cried while typing. I told one of my close friends I loved him in person. If you asked me to do that when I was 27 and I’d avoid you for 3 years. Anyway. I get at a low point at night and I need to share my feelings with people more. Part of my “gambling” problem which I’m working on. Is there really no other way for us to ever cross paths?
  18. So some context My ex 24F and I 24M dated for around a year. Very happy relationship, no major fights, travelled, spent time together, had fun together, overall I'd say we were a really good fit. I definitely see a future with her. Around two months ago we broke up. Some personal circumstances made me quite isolated and depressed. I wasn't really as aware of this as I probably should have been but the reality was I was quite lonely. On the opposite side she got incredibly busy with work, community and university to the point where we started to see less and less of each other. She was incredibly stressed. I tried to support her as much as I possibly could but after a few months it all became too much for me. I ended up asking for her to commit more time to the relationship. She of course couldnt do this and didn't want to let me down so the relationship ended (amicably, no fights/arguments/mean things said). In the coming days I had some other things happen which caused me to really hit rock bottom. I did the whole beg and plead deal which I'm not particularly proud of and it didn't go over particularly well. We didn't speak for about a month until I sent her some texts to see how she was. We had a polite conversation but she said she wanted to keep her distance for a while and not complicate things. Another month on I've removed a lot of the things which were causing my unhappiness and I'm doing much better. I texted her again and we met up for coffee. I was planning on offering and explanation, apologising for my actions and seeing if she would be interested in giving the relationship a second chance but she had had a really rough week so I just left it with some friendly conversation. We spent about and hour and a half together and laughed and talked like we used to. Life seems quite uncertain for her at the moment but it seems she is looking to tone things back a little to give herself more time. I have no idea if she'd be open to having another go at the relationship and there is of course only one way to find out but I'm wondering the best way to go about that. At a minimum I want to apologise either way. She is wrapping up the final weeks of semester and starting a new job this week so I don't want to throw this on top of that. I was thinking of wishing her the best of luck in her new job and asking if she would be willing to meet with me in a couple of weeks. If she says no then that's a pretty good indication and I will just have to find another way to deliver my apology. Does that seem reasonable? We only met up a few days ago. I guess I'm trying to get and answer either way so I can start to fully move on. Any other advice would be greatly appreciated
  19. Me and my ex (he is 18 and I am 19), that I was together with for three years, broke up about a month ago. The first post I made was about the break up, for the people that are interested. But long story short: he broke up with me a year ago because he said that he has lost feelings for me. He begged for a second chance 2 months later, and I took him back. 10 months later I broke up after him telling me that it seems like he has lost feelings again, even if he said that he didn´t mean it that way. He even cried like I have never seen him cry before. I then sent him a message, two days later, and asked for a second chance. But he replied with: "What we had, was our chance". We have now been in 1 month of NC, and I am the type of person that really doesn´t make contact after a breakup, I don´t feel the need to bother him. But the way we ended things, has haunted me everyday. I know people say that you don´t need closure, but I feel like I can´t be in peace with myself, or move on, without closure. I think it has a lot to do with my anxiety, and me being afraid of not getting to say goodbye the right way, before something suddenly happens to him or me. I know it is stupid, but I suffer from generalized anxiety and I am really afraid of something bad happening to the people I love. Thats why I sent him this message yesterday: Hi. It has now been 1 month since we broke up, and I did not plan on sending any messages to you, since it can be interpreted like weak in other peoples eyes, and maybe yours too. But I have been thinking that it is rather mature and strong of me, to end this relationship the right way. The way we ended things was immature of the both of us. Many people say that you do not need closure, but when we have known each other since 2014, been together for three years og been through both good and bad, I feel like I owe it to the relationship, to end this in a good way, once and for all. You will always be my first love, and I will always be yours. We are from the same area, and we know the same people, so pretending that none of us exist, is just childish. We will always have a past, and I will rather that we are grateful for everything we have been through, what we have learned from each other and how much we have grown together, instead of having hate og bitterness against each other. Everything happens for a reason, and unfortunately we just weren´t meant for each other. Regardless, you will always have an important place in my heart, and I wish you only the very best. Also, good luck on your exams, if you haven´t had them already!! He only replied with this, so cold..: I agree with what you are saying, we have a past together, and we should at least respect each other for that. I am not bitter over how things ended, because as you are saying, it is just how things had to happen. I wish you well, good luck on exams too. I just don´t understand how he can be so cold, and just acknowledge a small part of the message that I sent him. Is he really so over the situation? It really seems that way.. The thing is that the first time he broke up with me, he was this cold for three months. After three months he sent me a message, begging to get me back. Because of that, I am hoping that it will happen again, in three months. I feel like its so stupid of me, because I am sitting here with false hope and thinking that he eventually will come back..
  20. I've been in a relationship with a guy for 6 months. I found out while he was out of town he hung out with a girl and did not want to tell me. He finally admitted after I had my suspicions and broke u with him. He says nothing happen and he was afraid I would get mad if i knew they hung out but I've never been mad when he hangs out with opposite sex because he tells me. He wants a second chance. Would you stay or chalk that 6 months up to a lesson? They talk on the phone and social media
  21. There's a girl I met in a highschool class. We sat a row across from eachother and quickly become friends. I am led to believe that she was sexually interested in me, she would constantly touch me and get her to help her with schoolwork. This one time she "brought the wrong textbook" and decided to move and sit beside me to share, meanwhile she couldve shared with her friend who sat beside her. She sat very close to me and touched my legs and arms. I however, didnt really reciprocate and was instead more cordial because she was going through a breakup with her boyfriend at the time. Eventually, I asked her out over the phone and she said yes. She then quickly cancelled on me and sent me a long text about how I am really nice and she is interested in me but isnt ready. She said she wanted another chance in the future A few weeks later she has a new boyfriend. I honestly dont know what to think at this point. One side of me thinks that she liked me, but respects me and doesnt want me to be a rebound(Highly unlikely). The other side of me thinks that she simply used me as an ego boost when she was going through a rough time, and didnt want anything more. I like her a lot. I learned a lot about her, and I saw a lot of qualities in her that I like. I would never expect her to play me like this.(Why would she say that she wants another chance??????) I see her everyday in all my classes, and am not sure what to do. She has ignored me ever since the new semester after everything happened. Is it worth keeping her as an option and to stay open, Or should I do everything I can to try and forget about her and move on?
  22. I hate what happened with my 22-year-old friend. I just liked having someone to hang out with nearby and I didn't have to travel far to see who could spend so much time with me like that. He didn't even have to date me. I just liked hanging out with someone who had a lot of the same interests and time as me. His back and forth one day acting like my boyfriend and the next day as just friends was pissing me off also. I don't like the back and forth. If he just wanted to stay friends, he didn't have to do all that cuddly stuff when we were out. I didn't ask him to. I didn't know how to bring up what he wants. Some friends have told me I shouldn't say anything and pretend like nothing happened like he was doing the next day, but when he deleted me without saying anything back to me, I already knew why anyway, so I told him then I'm confused by him. One day he makes out with me hard core (he initiates it), the next day he only wants to hang out with me for an hour as friends only no touching, the third day he deletes me off social media. What's with this hot/cold behavior? He has to know that's driving me crazy inside. I think my life was stressing him also. I'm in a situation where I don't have a car and I have to borrow a family member's car and I always needed to be back by a certain time. I don't mind to be the one driving. He doesn't like driving and said he can't drive. He lives nearby so it was okay for me. I left him a message saying, that's fine if he doesn't want to talk or hang out right now. I just get bored being stuck at home without a car and I hate needing to ask for a car all the time while I'm saving money for one. And not having a car wasn't really an excuse -- we still walked around or did uber, but the car was the only privacy we had to just each other...we didn't do anything in the car, though. Even if he does come back when/if he's older, should I give him another chance? I don't like how I always have to deal with everything on my own and people seem to leave when they can't handle my situation. It shows I can't count on them. I've never left people when they were in difficult situations and I've never stopped being their friends or abandoned them just because their situations were tough or stressful. I'm seriously tired of the fact people always have to create other issues when distance isn't an issue. I don't know how many people would be blessed with a situation where all it took was to drive ten minutes to drive to see the person you are dating/hanging out with but people have to cause other problems. We didn't have to date right now and could still hang out as friends, but the attraction was too much also. Every time we saw each other we wanted to hook up but we didn't have any place to hook up so it made hanging out as friends difficult, lol. I've a feeling he may be back later because I ended up messaging him the last thing saying he's a nice guy, it's just that it was stressing me out not having my own car or my own place, etc, and I could see it stressed him out, too, when I was stressed. And also, I did end up mentioning how his hot/cold one day and the next was confusing me. Does this person deserve a second chance? Would you give this person a second chance when you're in a better situation to see this person? There's more people his age nearby for him to meet, so he can meet someone else easily nearby, but for me this was really a blessing to be able to hang out with someone that I could potentially date near by. Most people I've met online were at least 45 minutes to an hour.
  23. so i've been going out with her for atleast a month and it's been going great. we'd talk on the phone for hours, txt each other, hang out during lunch, go on dates and make out during some of the more boring movies (like The Return...God i swear...) but now she's getting obsessive. and clingy. she's been txting me lately and all she wants to do is say hi, get the watsup, and cyber. i'm thinkin " * * *, i'm not your 24/7 phone sex slave." and when it's not that it's her constant obsessive "oh i love you so much" every other txt. and that's fine i think, but i'm not her 24/7 worship center either. i really, really want to break up with her, but we really did have a great time with each other the first month. she's flip if i wasn't with her. i believe in second chances, but what should i do? gradually do less with her? tell her how i feel? dump her and hope she doesn't do something crazy?
  24. ALL I EVER WANTED All I ever wanted, Was someone to love, Someone special and divine, And who would be uniquely mine. All I ever wanted, Was someone to kiss, Someone who would stay close in times of despair, And who would always care. All I ever wanted, Was someone ever present when life gets tough, Someone who would hold on real tight, And who would keep me warm at night. All I ever wanted, Was someone to hug, Someone who would quell my every fear, And who would dry my ever tear. All I ever wanted, Was someone close and near, Someone who would be my one true friend, And who would stay until the end. All I ever wanted, Was someone to be my rhythm, Someone who would be my defining dance, And who would give me a second chance. All I ever wanted, Was someone who would listen, Someone who would reach out and hold my hand, And who would always understand. All I ever wanted, Was someone to wake up next to, Someone to cuddle in the morning, And who would be there when the new day is dawning.
  25. I woke up this morning with my breath sinking like a lonely ship, The bow breaking against the waves and all I could think of was how I'd lost you you, somewhere, gone from my eyes forever. I'll never have you again never feel your body on mine your hand on my hand your lips on my own I could not keep you even all the beautiful things we had weren't worth a second chance.
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