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Found 8 results

  1. Im 18yrs old...i went to the military right after high school. Before the military for about two months i stayed with my g/fs family becuase my family relocated to Orlando (We were in Fort Myers about 3 hrs away). I left for the military which was extremely hard. While in boot camp they found a prob with my knees and sent me home (to orlando) Now im living iwth my parents in Orlando and my g/f of 9 months (on Sept 11) is in Ft. Myers. Im having real difficulties staying here with my parents and not being there with her...any suggestions?
  2. Ok... Heres the story... Short and Sweet! Well... I Fancyed this dude called Orlando and i had for a while and then i started like his best mate ... I found out his best mate liked me to so now we are out... (if u have read my other posts you will see other problems lol) So now im over Orlando and my two best mates like him... Now im really good mates with Everyone... Inc Orlando... So Me and orlando got talking and he nos that both of my mates like him... The trouble is that the mates dont no they like the same boy... and when they do (Coz they did once b4) hell broke loose. If this happens again im going to be stuck in the middle like before too... But Worst of all... Orlando would neava go out with one of them and probs would go out with the other! THIS IS BAD. I really have no idea what to do! im alread invovled in this coz Im the only one who nos out of everyone who they like because appartnly im the most trustworthy! They dont want each other to no either... One friend nos that they like the same boi and the other one doesnt So annoying! HELP ME PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!
  3. Well I've never had one thats worked so far. There is a guy I really like, I wouldn't say love yet because I haven't met him. We get on really well, have voice and viedo convos over msn. We send text messages a few times a week on our cell phones. We flirt a lot, chat every day (if we don't have homework to do). He is 20 and I am 21. If you ever read any previous posts about my best friend you will know that she has gone to Orlando for 3 months to persue her love with a guy. She flew out yesterday. We've known him since we were 16. Well she asked me to fly over in June to stay for a week, her boyfriend agrees. The guy I like lives in CA. I asked him if he wanted me to fly out and meet him. He said that he doesn't know if we would get on irl because we are both really shy and probably wouldn't know what to say. But I would like to meet him even if it's just to meet him so we know what eachother are like irl. I met him at the end of January. Do you think it's too soon to be meeting him in June? It's not for deffinate that i'm going yet because I have to get a part time job to fund the trip (interveiw ment to be on friday wish me luck!) I will be going over to Orlando for a week if i get it but I'm hoping I can fly over to CA for a few days to a week. How long should I go for? I don't want to put him out. I would be staying in a hotel not at his place. I told him I like him and he has just recently made it clear that he likes me. Is there any precations I should take when taking the trip or should I just wing it? I've never been out of Europe before but I've always wanted to see America even if only once. He said he'd like to visit me but we are both at college and I'm going to university for 2 years come September (if I get accepted). Advice would be apreciated. Thanks, ~S.
  4. Well I wouldn't say we are exactly dating as we have never given our relationship a title. We've both said we like eachother and I was going to America for the first time to see my best friend who has just recently moved to Orlando. I'm going to see the guy for a week and I'm so nervious it's unreal. I've known him since January so we will have been friends for 5 months when I go there. I don't know what to do or say! I'm so nervious about flying half way accross the world and meeting someone who I really like. At one point we were talking on msn every day with webcams, mic etc. But right now we are both getting ready to take our finals and have essays etc to finish. So will talk on weekends if we are lucky. I miss his company and although I don't have much time for anything other then revision (taking the ocational break to chat to people, paint and read. Hey we all need to destress when we're studying). I really do miss our chats. So all my flights are booked now. I fly to Orlando on 31st of may at 6am.. I can't wait to see my best friend and I know she will know just how to calm me down when I get there. I then fly on to CA on 7th June. He has said he will pick me up from the airport and drive me to my hotel (yep I even got a hotel). I'm just worried, what if he doesn't like me? What if I don't like him? What if I'm too shy to say anything? Thanks for reading, ~S.
  5. Hi, I need help with my relationship after a New Year incident. I need to know how to get my girlfriend to get in touch with her true feelings rather than locking them away to stop herself getting hurt again. What I am about to describe is not universally considered a major problem. Just 4 verbal rants over 14 months. Marriage counsellors help couples get over far, far worse. As this is lengthy, I will split it into two sections: HISTORY and SINCE THEN. For those who hate War & Peace - skip to SINCE THEN. HISTORY Since meeting in Oct 2004, my girlfriend and I have been totally fab but I did have a fear of losing her due to "what goes around comes around" as I treated my previous girlfriend badly. After first few month, I settled down but then........ To my girlfriend, stability is important and we met as I was changing jobs due to medical reasons. In all, I changed jobs 3 times in 2005. This caused even more worry that I'd lose her. So, in Sep 2005, as my stress peaked, I just snapped over a minor thing on holiday in Orlando and really horrible verbal abuse came out. It shocked me. We made up that day though and I promised not to do it again. We were going great after that then in Dec, I snapped for no reason 2 more times. Silly. Stupid. I think I was living a self fulfilling prophecy. One was kind of understandable. We picked a Xmas tree and I made sure she was happy with it. As we queued up, she kept saying she wasn't sure and I genuinly said "we can change it. I don't mind". She declined. She kept going on and kept refusing my offer to change it. This went on for 15 minutes. Finally, when we got to the check out after a quarter of an hour, she said she wanted another one and I'd had my patience tested I hissed "F**king hell! Get another bloody tree then!" Final snap was on New Years Eve. At 6pm, we were kissing and very happy. By 11pm, I'd caused a row over absolutely nothing and called her bluff by threatening to end it. 'Twas nothing at all like the previous time where I was real nasty. Was just me being a spoilt brat. Looking for attention (aren't I great?) When I saw her the next day on Jan 1st, she said she feels she was pushed too far that night and she withdrew. She admitted she loves me but looks at me differently now. She's not sure if she can get it back, worried she is wasting her time only to be hurt again. Knowing her as well as I do (but wary of mind reading) I think it's her defence mechanism. Her barriers were real hard for me to break down in the first place as she's very wary so I know they have shot up again - hurt by the person she trusted. She has since told me that she never really got over the first episode in Orlando and that it's playing on her mind. Call me arrogant but I don't believe that love - and it was in her eyes just a few hours earlier on New year Eve can disappear just like that. I think her heart's just sheathed itself in it's armour like it was when I met her. At least I hope that's the case! At the end of the day, we've had just 4 spats. Two in the Sep and two in Dec All were over nothing - so no major underlying issue with our relationship - and only the one in Orlando was serious as I was nasty. We've never argued. I've just blown off. All were made up immediately (save for this last time) and for the rest of the 360 days together, we talked & texted everyday: proffering our love each time. And we'd see each other too! Even since Orlando, despite what she now says, her love has shone like a beacon and was even moved, in December, to go out of her way and to leave a love note on my car! From Jan 1st to Jan 6th, no matter what I said, she was cold and reluctant. When she said she doesn't know if we'll work out, I said that is the case for any relationship and that no one knows the future but we've been great and we can put right what's gone wrong to make us even better. But it didn't make a difference. I pointed out all the great things she did to show she loves me enough, what I did to show my love and to illustrate how great we are together. Again, it wasn't making a difference. I talked and talked, threw in fact, text messages, memories, metaphors etc but to no real avail. And yes, I did admit I was wrong and that I can change and that I may even seek help to ensure it happens. So with this in mind, I really need to know how to get her to uncover that sheath of armour around her heart and to acknowledge her true feelings so that she can make a sound decision. SINCE THEN We decided to give it a go. You don't know if you don't try. On Friday 6th Jan, she suggested to "take a step back and return to dating". At first she was reluctant, pessimistic and closed off with body language and conversation. Monday 9th and just a few days later, we had come a million miles. She called me "babe" again on the phone and when we watched TV together, her body language was better. She sought out my hand, held it and stroked it whereas a few days earlier, she would just let me hold it. Wednesday 11th we went to a pub quiz. It went great. Lots of massive eye contact, touching and great flowing conversation. On the way home, she made the move to hold my hand. At her house, she threw her arms around me and gave me a few close mouthed kisses. Friday 13th - our first real date. We really clicked. She sought out my hand over the restaurant table as well as other "love" style body language. Our eyes would lock and they'd dance together. When we went to the bar, she would put her hand on my leg (I was sat opposite) and she would caress my hand. This was just a week from when she reluctantly agreed to give it a go. Neither of us expected such massive results so soon! It boded well. Everyone who saw us on Friday would think we are a couple in love. We are. Her body betrays it. But her mind is still frozen with fear and is thus detached. Back at her house, when she was leaning into me on the sofa, holding my hand, I went for the kiss but she wouldn't french kiss me and feels it's too soon and that we've only just taken a step back. She said what I knew all along - that she does love me: "I do love you and know this is too good to throw away but at the same time, a part of me is saying 'walk away'. I'm in turmoil" Thing is, even when I left, she said "I really don't want you to leave. I want you to stay so much and it's driving me mad but I have this inner turmoil...." Sunday 15th I popped round for lunch. As we kissed, close mouthed, and wrapped our arms around one another, she went to french kiss me and got very sexual. After a minute or two of heavy groping, she composed herself and went to the toilet. She isn't the type to just get carried away but it had been ages since weither of us have had any sexual release so I assumed she just got carried away and went to sit on the sofa. When she returned 5 minutes later, she straddled me on the sofa and started again! She is not the kinda girl to do that unless she really wants to. She knows how upset I am at our situation and wouldn't play with my emotions unless she truly felt it. That night we went out, returned home and cosied together on the sofa. She wrapped her arms around mine, kissed me and leaned into me. We close mouthed kissed some more and then began to french kiss like earlier in the day. I really though we were getting somewhere. Monday 16th was even better as I received a text saying "I am just sat here thinking what a great weekend we had...thank you!" Wednesday 18th she excitedly rang to make sure we were still going out that night. Yet......... Wednesday 18th and on our next date, we went out again. She again held my hand as we walked yet when I dropped her off, she couldn't french kiss me - despite the kissing on two occasions on Sunday and the text and the excited phone call. And this is the crux. It's like she can only let go, emotionally, to a certain level and getting her beyond that is killing me. Especially as I know how she really feels. I wouldn't waste my time if there was nothing. About the sudden reluctance not to kiss she meekly said what she said previously: "we've taken a step back remember?". Yes we had and we were taking it nice, slow and natural. We progressed far and the kssing was not rushed but it's like she's gone "I kissed him. I let him in. I can't do that! I'll get hurt! Pull back. No tongues. Pull back to safety!" See how frustrating this is? When I point out to her her positive body langauge - she tenses and withdraws as though she let herself slip and must pull up the barriers again. I know we have something special. I know she still loves me. Despite all this, the only person who doesn't seem to know this is my girlfriend! She knows she has run for the hills. She feels her love/trust was betrayed by me. we have discussed it a bit. I want her to understand that I am the same person she fell in love with and that if she exorcises her demons, and I end my death wish spats we can move on but what can I do to help her? And if she won't french kiss me, how do I get our relationship back on track? She's obviously still holding back, mentally and emotionally even though she wants to break free and give in to me. Sorry for the 100,000,000 word essay. J
  6. Ok so my girlfriend of 2 years dumped me a month ago and started dating another guy, we still saw each other the first two weeks after. Then I started NC, both because I read is what i should do and because I know she wanted it too. No contact lasted 1 week, I didn't call her, I didn't email her. But then after the hurricane passed (I'm in Orlando, FL) she stopped by my house the next Sunday, even though she knew there wasn't any injured in Orlando, same reason why even then I didn't call her. She came and we talked for a while, about the hurricane, not us, then we went to B&N (the book store) and spend some time there together "as friends" and then we went to dinner. Ok so when the day ended we said good-bye and a kiss on the cheek, I started NC again. She called yesterday to "test her phone line" because she didn't know who else to call. How about her new bf? The thing is that I still love her, and I love her a lot, I'd do anything for her and to be with her. I wish we could come back and that's why I started NC, following the advise from the "Getting back together" forum. The thing is: She broke NC twise. Should I keep it up still or give her a call to say hi? What do I do when the dumper breaks NC?
  7. I was the one dumped and I live in Orlando, FL. But I wanted to know if she's Ok. Can I call her? Or should I keep NC no matter what?
  8. Hi, For those who read my last post know that i was having a really hard time getting over ( I still am ) my ex who i was with for 3 years.Our breakup was really bad. Its been almost 3½ months since i havent talked to her but on dec 12 i am going to spend a few days at her house cuz we are moving to orlando. I really don't want to talk to her about us cuz i am still healing but i know for a fact i am going to do something stupid like asking her to get back. She really broke my heart but yet i still have love for her & i alwayz will. Just few days ago she told me she wasnt listening to her heart when she broke up with me. That made me think about her more and made me think there is still a chance for us. I really need some advise from you guyz about this so plz help ~1~
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