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Hi this would be my first post here. I had an issue I’m not sure how to sort out with a girl I have feelings for so here I am I guess! 😅 I’m a 26 year old guy and have unfortunately lost a very close person in my life and don’t know what to do.. Basically right at the start of the pandemic I went through a lot of painful depression and a rejection with a girl I really liked in college and I got really depressed and felt terrible as 2020 kicked off. But a few months later with the encouragement of a female friend I got a particular dating app and matched with a girl I’ll call Alice. I got her number and we talked sometimes and we always got along well and enjoyed talking to one another and eventually ended up being good friends the rest of the year. She thought I was cute and really liked my personality and vise versa and wanted to go on a date, but we couldn’t actually hang until 2021 because she worked a lot of hours as a manager at a warehouse and could barely afford to live and had a very stressful life which I completely understood. We really bonded, talked on the phone and texted and we were very close. She always was there for me and it was like we’d known each other our entire lives, and she said she felt the same as well. Things were good and we always planned to finally meet one day. We were so close and it was the most amazing thing in the world because I understood her and she understood me very well, and we both admitted to each other that we both felt like soulmates. The world made sense with her there and she told me she felt the same way too and it was genuine. She wanted to see me and get to know me in person. A little while later one day she told me she had to let me know she already had a guy, and that she still wanted to talk to me. I was upset but I told her we could still talk and be friends. It’s funny because even after she told me that it’s like we both grew even closer and I got the feeling she still liked me and we shared our hopes and dreams together. She always told me she had no one in her life who supported or helped her and I was the only one, and she was so happy I was in her life. I know some people might think she was just leading me on but I can say for certain she wasn’t. She legitimately cared about me and liked me. All her words and actions confirmed it. She was always there for me and helped me out when I had nobody and I always did everything I could to help her. We got very close and she always helped me and told me how grateful she was I was in her life, and how I was her one and only because I was the only person in her life that supported or cared about her. She always told me she wanted to see me and didn’t want me to go or be gone from her life. She told me she was very unhappy with everything in her life and that I really helped her feel better whenever she was sad or upset for any reason. It was amazing having someone like her there. Like somebody who understood you, who thought like you and who was always saying they were there for you and wouldn’t ever go. Like somebody could be the only thing you’d ever need, someone who could take all your sadness away and replace it with happiness.. she did that for me and I let her know she did. And she was very happy she could do that for me. Alice was really an amazing person.. I prayed for someone like her and my prayers were answered. Then finally we met. We went to a carnival and when we finally met it was amazing, like she was the lost love, the soulmate who was always out there for me. We had an amazing time and got to know one another, but it was like we already knew each other (aside from texting and phone calls) all our lives. It was amazing and she told me so much about herself, even her deepest feelings and secrets. She wanted to hang with me again and told me she was so happy I was in her life and we planned to hang out again after that wonderful day. It was like two people destined for each other meeting, it was truly amazing. Well, after a few weeks of talking like we always did and everything being perfect, out of the blue I got a voicemail from her. She said she had some news that wasn’t good, and that she only liked me as a friend, and that she didn’t wanna cause an issue in her current relationship because of us. She said she appreciated everything I did for her but that she felt like we had to stop talking. She said she was sorry things had to end like this but she felt it was the best thing for her to do at that time... I haven’t heard from her in a couple months and I am beyond heartbroken. I guess I just want some advice on what to do, because I feel in my heart we were soulmates, and I don’t use that word lightly. I know it’s hard to communicate all that happened between us in just a few paragraphs but I can assure you all that we were indeed very close and she had feelings for me. I just wanted to know if there’s any advice that could help me sort this out, help me to know if there’s a chance things could go back to the way they were, or if the feelings she had for me could be rekindled? I thought as a last resort I could go to see her in person and try to talk to her, ask her what went wrong or if we could even be friends at least again. I’m just feeling very lost right now, not knowing if she’ll hate me for going to see her or what.. I just need some advice on how to sort this all out. I pray for her and for things to work out everyday, I just feel so bad that someone I was so close with could just abandon me like that. I know some people might say to just move on but please understand we were very close. Despite having somebody already and having a difficult life she made room in her life and her heart for me. We both meant a lot to each other. I can’t just write it all off as being all for nothing. If anyone has some advice to offer me some hope or encouragement to try to see her again please let me know, and please keep in mind I’m a sensitive guy. Thanks for reading this and thank you for leaving any advice. I greatly appreciate it!
I saw someone who looked like you today I tried not to stare but I couldn’t look away Her eyes were like yours and the way she wore her hair I wonder what she thought when she saw me standing there I tried to turn away but my muscles just froze And as I tried to shut my eyes, they just wouldn’t close My heart kicked up feeling that I just couldn't trace As she walked right past me and I looked at her face.... I thought I saw you today but it was just the way she wore her hair And I realize these days I just see you everywhere……..