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  1. I've identified as bisexual since I was 12 and now im starting to question my sexuality more than ever. We have only been together for a month and he knows im bisexual (im pretty open about it) so I think there won't be an enormous amount of backlash. I told my friend (straight) about the situation and he said that he's very dissapointed in me since im basically leading him on and frankly that's the truth and I believe that I am the bad guy in this situation. I've been stressing out on how to break the news to my boyfriend for over 2-3 weeks.
  2. ! : English is not my primary language. Some texts that i write here are copied from another person that express exactly how i feel but in a better way that i could write myself. I am a bi guy and I get these feelings of jealousy with regard to lesbians. So much that nowadays I don't even watch movies or tv shows with lesbian characters. I don't have the feelings when it comes to gay men. For example in the show "Arcane", i really enjoy it, is great, i like the character of Vi and the one of Caitlyn and they are cute together but, I wouldn't call them intense feelings, I just feel a bit uncomfortable and jealous. Is this a form of homophobia ? How can i work on it ? Other informations : - I think i'm okay with my actual gender - It is not particulary from that show but in all show, note that i have no female who is in a lesbian relationship actually - I have a lesbian friend and i never have this kind of feelings towards her
  3. Hey everyone. Before you start to read, let me apologize for the length. But, I am in a very hard to read situation. I am head over heels in love with one of my closest friends. She, as far as I'm aware, has no idea. I also don't know if she's gay, bi-sexual, or straight. We've known each other for about 4 years, but just recently became very close. Last year at this time we were inseperable. We did everything together. We went out to dinner at least once or twice a week. Over the past 6 months or so, things have gone downhill. She started acting really distant and short with me. It continued over the summer. It was so drastic that we didn't hang out once. We are back at school now and things have improved slightly. She seems to have major mood swings--- but only with me (not with other people). One day she will be short with me (never mean or rude though), and the next she will be friendly. I don't know how to read her anymore. At first I thought that it had to be something that I was doing. But I haven't changed or done anything differently around her. Some reasons why I believe she might like me back She holds eye contact almost uncomfortably long. If we're in a situation (a meeting, for example) where there are others around, I'll catch her looking at me, and then she'll immediately look away or smile. If we're in a situation that's casual (dinner, for example) with other people, whenever she tells a joke or is even laughing at someone else, she'll look at me. Almost checking to see if I'm laughing or to share her laughter with me. Her face seems to brighten up a lot of times when she looks at me. She plays with her hair and fidgets sometimes when we're together. One more than one occasion, she joked (?) about us being lesbian moms, having kids, and being a couple. Physical contact doesn't happen often with us, but when it does, it's intense. Some examples: We were looking at photos on my digital camera and she came up and wrapped her arm right arm around my left arm, and held onto my hand. Another time that we were looking at my camera, she held onto my hand to look. We were rolling out pizza dough once and I had to hold the table cloth down. My hand (the palm) was against the table and the back of my hand was on her *very* upper thigh. She didn't move or seem uncomfortable at all--- it was there for at least 3 or 4 minutes. We've also shared a few bear hugs. I've met her whole family, when others that were around were not introduced. She mimicks some things I say and the way I say them. She thinks the way I say certain words is cute. She's told me things that she's never told anyone else. When we sit by each other, we're usually thigh to thigh.The Negatives I feel like recently I have been going out of my way to talk to her. The mood swings; it's almost like there's two of her. She can walk right by me and not say a word, or even acknowledge my presense. She keeps blowing off my invites to dinner or to just hang out. It seems like she's avoiding me. When we do talk, it's always rushed and she seems uninterested. She talks about guys quite a bit.Sorry for the length, but I thought that might help clear things up a little bit. So I'm guessing my question is, how would you read this? I know that I need to talk to her, it's just hard when I don't get time with her anymore. I plan on talking to her ASAP, I would just kind of like to get a reading to see what I'm up against. Thanks!
  4. This is awkward for me to be posting on here due to the fact that I don't know how others will react or if they are rude and obnoxious on these forums. >_ Well I am 16, lesbian and I'm posting because my girlfriend is very shy about letting me do anything to her under her clothing, she is very self conscious about her body and really all I need to know is how I can put up with it or maybe let her feel more better about herself. I'm quite shy myself about letting her see underneath so I just need some help about it. It seems so rediculous and yet it's such a pain. It's not easy to let it go, everyonce in a while I can get through to her and do something but it's not easy. I don't mind going slow but it's just a rare amount that I can get to her. I talk to her about it, just the same answers.
  5. Reason why I am posting this here is because these films are so good in portraying when you meet that "special person" you just hit it off with from the start and you always have something to talk about, that sort of chemistry you just dont find that often, maybe once or twice in your lifetime. If you have watched either of these films, has it happened to you? Have you ever started talking with someone and found yourself really interested in her every word (and vice-versa) and talked about many many different things/subjects and then realize that you been talking with that person for ages and time just flew by? And to make it more like the two films, have you crossed paths with this person again like 5 yrs+ later and still find that you can talk to her for ages and ages and laugh and discover that there are so many similarities between you and her in your past, present, tastes, etc... Just posting this because this film reminded me so much of this girl I met like 5 yrs ago, she came to town with my friend (Emily) and I just went there to say hi to Emily because I hadnt seen her in ages as she moved to London, when I got to her sister's house she had brought two of her friends with her (Michelle and Amie) I didnt pay attention to any of these 2 girls I hadnt met because I was there to see Emily and catch up, she has been a good friend of mine for ages (her brother is my best friend)... anyway, we all ended up sat in the conservatory talking and once Michelle started talking we sort of hit it off, I mean, suddenly after we been talking for ages we noticed that everyone had left the conservatory, we didnt even notice that, she even had to get showered and dressed to go out clubbing but we kept on talking and talking and talking (laughing a lot as well) and its not just laughing but talking about interesting things, UFO's meaning of life, politics etc...(things you wouldnt usually talk about with a girl you just met in case you freak her out) Anyway, eventually she had to go and get dressed and I drove them down to the club, I had no money and I dont like people paying for me or borrowing money so I dropped them off there and that was the end of that. 5+ yrs passed, I even moved countries, changed jobs, etc... (so many things can happen in 5 yrs) and came back to the UK, my friend invited me to Emily's wedding and Michelle was there, once again we had so much to talk about, the amazing chemistry was still there, the laughs, everything, she recognised me straight away, first thing I said to her when I approached her was: "do you remember me?" she looked at me and her eyes light up and she said: "oh god, yeah, we talked for ages that night" But unlike movies not all things are straight forward, when I first met her she must have been like 16/17 and she was there with her girlfriend (great isnt it? ) now 5 yrs later, she was there with the same girl again, I mean, if she was with another girl I could try to be more persuasive about getting her number or email, etc.. but if she has been with the same girl for over 5 yrs then things must be going pretty well between them, who am I to interfere? (not to mention the fact that she is a lesbian) and besides she lives 2hrs away from my town. Would you guys take action in this situation? or do like me and just try to forget about it and hope that next time you cross paths things might be different? This is not the first time I have fallen for a lesbian, ages and ages ago I met a girl in College who was obviously a lesbian, we met through friends and I never had any intention of it being more than friendship (the first few months anyway) but both of us went through so much, I will never forget when she knocked my window at like 4:30am to wake me up to tell me that she was in love with me and had to get that out of her system but she was a lesbian and couldnt see that changing about herself... ...which brings me to this question: how can someone that is gay refuse to do what is considered normal even if they are in love with someone from the opposite sex? do they feel like they are betraying their own believes even if its likely those believes are temporary? I mean most gay people switch back at some point in their lives, not all of them, but most of them do eventually. I just dont understand how this can happen, if I was gay and I fell in love with a girl I think I would at least be bi, or be gay but make that girl the exeption... or am I getting it all wrong? Peace!
  6. Hi, Not sure whether this is the right place for this topic. Anyway, I'm lesbian and SO's is bisexual. We both don't wanna to be out due to circumstances. Recently, I've been offered a job at SO's company. The pay is what I've asked for but my SO isn't thrilled with idea that I'll be working in the same office with her. (Seeing each other everyday, what if we had an argument etc.) Should I take up the job because the pay is good or should I decline it because I don't wanna to ruin the relationship? What's yr opinion?
  7. I have a bestfriend of two years, who I live with. I've always had a sort of crush on her, especially the past 4 months. I just disregarded the whole thing and let it go. Then the other night I came out to her that I'm fairly positive I'm a lesbian. She just smiled and said, "I know it. Everyone knows. Hell a lot of people think you're in love with me." I was shocked that was said, thinking to myself oh no, crap. But then she said, "It's okay I told them I'm not your type anyway" That's what gets me, did she expect me to say, "Yes you are my type." Anyone else in that situation, as far as my girlfriends go, would have said no way and been slightly uncomfortable. The whole conversation went so incredible well, and she looked at me like she doesn't normally look at me. It got me all back to square one with my feelings to her, and to think I was finally over it all... This is where my question comes in, where do you draw the line between friendliness and flirtation. She's bisexual. I never see her with chicks, but she does comment on them. We are very cuddly, more than I have been with anyother girlfriend. She will kiss me on the cheek, she will hold me from behind when we go to bed, she will play fight me, she will hug me, hold my hand. We were sitting on a blanket in a park watching a movie one night and she linked her arm in mine then commented that an older lady smiled at us and thought we were lesbians. She's "joked" around and said if we were to sleep together who would be the butch and who would be the femme" etc. All those thing, just crossed my mind after that night, and I'm sitting here wondering if she's trying to figure out if I'm interested in her or I'm just over thinking the whole situation. I've never been like this with a female friend before in my life. So, where do you draw the line?
  8. The 98% of my erotic dreams -since I started having them when I was way younger- are about GIRLS. I rarely dream about getting it on with guys. They do not turn me on at all in any of my dreams. But girls do! What is this supposed to mean? I've always considered myself hetero and been in hetero relationships. I've also felt attracted by girls when I'm awake, but is basically pure lust -I've never been with one at all-. I do not see myself in a long term relationship with another girl or woman. Although I don't think I'd have any problems for making out with one... So, is my subconscient like.... gay or something? Or is this an indication I might be... bi? Also... I get WAAAAY more turned on if I fantasize about girls than about boys. But I can be turned on by boys in reality as well... I've always been intrigued by this... I wonder why homosexuality is somehow deep inside my brain -like for emerging constantly in so many dreams-.
  9. Hello Everyone, I'm sure there are tons of posts like this one..but ...at the age of 34 I am questioning my sexuality. The reason i am posting is because i want some input from others who have determined that they are gay/lesbian. I have done minimal research and from what i've gathered its just something that you know but in my mind I feel the mere fact that I am even questioning my sexuality is a clue that it's something i need to look into. Hence how i am to find this website. I guess what i'm asking is what does "looking into your sexuality" look like? I have no idea where i would go to meet/talk to lesbians or other gays and even if i did...how would i know? I have looked on the internet to see if i can get some insight - maybe a story or something that will "click" and i can say - yeah i feel that way or no i dont ... This isn't soemthing new for me it's a question that has popped up in my mind from time to time- and i feel it's something worth addressing. How does one begin to explore their sexual orientation? If i was would i just know or would i be feeling as confused as I am now? I would appreciate any honest feedback..... thank you....
  10. I have been lurking and reading here for several weeks. My heart goes out to so many of you, and I have been inspired as well by so many. Here is my story. My ex and I had been together for about 7 years. Living together and breaking up (but never REALLY breaking up) 3 times during that period. The thing is my ex is not very comfortable with her sexuality, she hates "labels" (many people do) but for the sake of understanding I will call her bi sexual. I am a lesbian, and I am comfortable out. When we met 7 years ago she was going through a divorce. We had "passion" and I feLLl in love hard. ( I was not her first woman) I thought she did as well, but she just has so many issues beyond not wanting to have an openly pubic lesbian relationship. She was in a car accident years ago her neice was killed. Her mother committed sucide when she was young, her Dad molested her, her husband beat her...lord the baggage. I fell anyway, and even harder for son. Because she was somewhat mentally unstable and not on meds (at that time) I took care of them. She lost her job and I told her to go back to school, she did that. I supported them. I finally convinced her she needed meds, shes was on them when I left. (yes I left, I never felt secure and finally I left) When I met them they were in a run down trailer shack, now they live in a beautiful home and she makes great money. She always wanted to be the fun parent to her son so she never wanted to disipline him. So when he did bad in school Iwas the one who convinced her to ground him etc...I want him to be somebody, and he can be! anyway, we spilt 8 weeks ago and nows she's with a guy. The son is glad because she hid our relationship from him for all those years for fear her would reject her. Yes, he knew anyway but pretended not to. And the person who was the rule maker is gone now, so he could care less I guess. The first few weeks I figured out pretty quick she was going into party mode, she was never home etc...she drunk dialed me... She kept up contact with me until last week when I got a huge cell bill and insisted that she get new cells phones for herself and her son. They had no home phone so I had let her keep the cell phones until she got new phones..well she got them and didn't even bother to tell me. When I finally got them back. (out of the mailbox that I had to drive too...) I haven't heard from either of them since. His Dad, pays child support but has nothing to do with him in 7 years...it's been me, and the kid. And now NOTHING.. I FEEL SO USED!! PLEASE HELP FOLKS...
  11. Hi Folks. I need to know if anyone has been through what I am going through, and if they have any advice (I am sure someone has!) This is going to be a little long, but the background is important I think. I am almost 40. My ex is 37. I have an out lesbian since I was 18. She is bisexual (although would not ever classifly herself as that...she hates the idea of a label) Anyway, we were together 7 years. She has a son , he is now 17. She is not comfortable in an out lesbian relationship. When we first met I tried to be understanding of this, since I was her first serous realtionship with a woman. She did not want to tell her son and she wanted to....ease...everyone into this. Well, needless to say, we lived in the closet (and remember I had already been out for many years) This almost killed me, she would flirt with guys all the time, I never felt secure. I helped to raise her son, but he considered me the Nanny and not the step parent. There were allot of lies, and allot of pain. Her family is very disfunctional as well. Her Mother commited sucide when she was 10, her Father molested her and her deaf sister and has always hid himself IRL behind being a christian. She had a car accident 10 years ago in which her niece was killed. (she was driving and cited for the wreck) Her other niece who was also in the car, has grown up really messed up, drugs, etc. they were very close to their Aunt. Anyway, she has issues. As the years progressed I began to feel used, and ashamed of myself for letting me feel like I was not worth being proud to be with. 3 years ago I tried to OD. But...I went back, this time I THOUGHT on my terms...but really it wasn't that I didn't still love her and want to be with her, it was just that I couldn't take anymore and didn't know what to do. Anyway, about nine weeks ago, she went off to the beach. (she never wanted to leave me alone, she was very jealous, although I never gave her reason...I think it was becuase she may have been running around with guys some of the time) Anyway, I was supposed to come down a few days later, I did that, but I found some evidence that she had been doing some drugs and that she had been with some guys. I told her I was leaving, I brought her (our son) home with me because he wanted to go. (just to be with his friends...he is a teenager) So I stayed 2 more days at the house waiting for her to come home, because I had him) And then, I left. Like I said that was 9 weeks ago. This hurts SO bad. We satrted NC 2 weeks ago,I think she dating a guy now. That is killing me, what was I? I made her finally return my cells phones when she ran the bill up way high, and the day she got new ones, she did not give me either of their numbers! I put her though school, and I helped her raise him. I spend more time with that boy then either of this parents did in the last 7 years..homework, games, sickness everything parents do. I did. She lost her job, I supported us, the three of us. (His Dad has talked to him maybe 5 times in 7 years) Encougaged her to go back to school, which she did, and now she has a great job... I'm upset, I am angry, I am broken hearted... I feel like I have lost a child. He knew about the two of us, even though she didn't tell him, but he used to tell her he did not want her to be gay.. and he would run away. He is very spoiled. I could go on for days, you get the idea...please help.
  12. Hi everyone, I writing here because i don't know who I can talk to to help heel the pain I'm going through. My ex and I have been dating for over 3 years. Recently we went our separate ways, but it wasn't on mutual terms. We split because she falling in love with a friend she met at a lesbian club. They've only know each other for no more than 3 month and she wants to pursue the relationship with this girl. I can't seem to let go of her because I've never been in love before until I met her. We were so happy with each other for the first couple of year until last year when things started going down hill due to financial trouble, not with me but with her. She says she's happy for coming out. Don't get me wrong, I don't have a problem with her coming out. The problem I have is I know her well enough that it's more than just coming out. We didn't break up with either one of us having someone else in our lives, she was already seeing this new girl. Anyone?
  13. I am not gay, I am not lesbian, nor bisexual or transgender. Let me explain. I am desperately in love with my husband's brother Most posters in most forums are truly shocked by this and eventually, I feel like I am not welcome. I thought you people are bound to be an open minded group; more open minded than the others and there really is no place for someone like me to ask for advice. The minute I share my story (not much of a story, actually...) I am like leper... Will you make an exception and let me post here?
  14. Hi, I am a lesbian & my sex drive seems to be very low. I have a partner but rarely orgasm with her. It is getting very frustrating on me - Can I take any herbal treatments?? or would u suggest anything I could take?? I really need help soon, as I want to enjoy sex more with my lover. Please reply to me, thanks.
  15. We are not close anymore. Its been weeks since we were close, and I feel lousy. I'm the main cause for the problem. Are there any other Alcoholic Lesbian's out there that I can talk to?
  16. hi everyone, this is my first post in a while. i came here asking lots of questions a while back and learned a lot - thanks everyone! one of the things that i struggled with was the fact that i might be lesbian. it * * * *ing freaked me out because of all the prejudice that i associated with it...until yesterday. i had an epiphany which i want other people to confirm. ok. i always that being gay was about your sexual orientation. that`s what we learn and hear all the time. it freaked me out because though i thought i might like girls, it disgusted me to think about having sex with a girl. but do you know what?? i reckon being gay (or lesbian, at least) is when your mind is attracted to minds of the same sex. as someone who might be gay, i have always found that guys, while straightforward to talk to, are not as interesting to talk to as girls, who have this complexity about them. i think stright-forward mind + complex mind = harmony. i think for gay people (or anyone in between at any degree) their minds aren`t the usual minds you find in a straight guy or girl. so naturally a gay guy won`t find the same harmony with a girl and vice versa. Straight or gay, you fall in love with someone because of their mind, their personality, their energy first and foremost, not because of their sexuality. i think it`s misleading and wrong to say that being gay is all about sexual attraction. I think that is what gives some people the impression that gay people are really sexual, and maybe even disgusting or lesser than straight people . so. being gay should be defined as: being mentally, emotionally, physically attracted to someone of the same sex. don`t you reckon??
  17. Okay... all my life I have liked guys. (I'm a girl, if I haven't yet gone to my profile to specify this...) I'm almost certain I still like guys. But about four months ago, I realized that I like girls, too. I've never dated a girl, though, nor had a definitely sexual relationship with one (My friend Christina and I grab eacbhother's boobs a lot, but we both have boyfriends). I'm 16. The thing is, that was just brought to my attention today, is that even though I like guys.... I DON'T like their... appendages. In fact, I would much prefer the female appendages, and have always wondered what it would be like to... well, no need for details on that. Now I know I'm young, and this confusion and questioning and experimenting is typical of the age group... but I am sexually active, and I kinda feel like, if penis is an acquired taste, I SHOULD be liking it by now. But I don't. I really don't. I don't think they're completely disgusting... but I do feel a slight bit of revulsion toward them, and I really don't like what comes out of them. I kind of have to force myself to do favors for my boyfriend. I do it because I know he likes it and he does the same for me, but I don't particularly enjoy it. I've read all sorts of stories about girls who LOVE giving head and stuff like that, and I've always maintained that they can't possibly be true. ...But are they? Do a lot of girls actually like that? To make matters worse, I am definitely in love with the boyfriend I have now. He's the best boyfriend I've ever had. But I also have a bit of a crush on my friend Christina... I had a dream about her last night, and I think what scares me is that it wasn't at all sexual. We were at some sort of convention in an auditorium, and we were sitting next to eachother, and she fell asleep on me, and I felt... fuzzy. Warm and fuzzy. I told my boyfriend about the dream, but I led him to believe that it was sexual, because honestly, that would bother him less than the more intimate atmosphere that was actually present... I feel kinda bad, but I just think he'd consider it cheating on him if I had a crush on her... *sigh* Well, I told another good friend of mine about the dream... this friend is rather well-read in the area of sexual questioning, and she said that if I have to force myself to like penis, I might be a lesbian. She said, "Take Berky's head... and put it on Christina's body. Would you like that?" Well, apart from the freaky image, I would LOVE that. If I really think about it... say if I had a choice whether Berky, with the same personality and beliefs, was a boy or a girl... I'm not sure... but I really wouldn't mind him as a girl. In any case, there are many things that tell me I'm not a lesbian... I like guys! And, there's no reason for me to be in denial, because I have no problems with the LGBTQ community. I wouldn't mind being a lesbian at all. But... I dont' know the normal stages of coming out to onesself, so I don't know if there really is this huge denial for people, in which they think they can't possibly be gay. I think it must be different for everyone.... So basically, other than posting this, my other way of trying to solve the problem is asking all my close girl friends if they like penis, and if perhaps they didn't at first. So, give me your thoughts, and straight girls, if you have a good answer to that same question, it'd be appreciated... thanks. Oh, one last thing, I'm not sure if it matters... but I RARELY have sexual dreams about guys. Very rarely. When I do have sexual dreams, it's almost always about girls. And, I've always been something of a tomboy, and I usually quite despise the "girly-girl" look, though, as I know, you don't have to be a tomboy to be a lesbian, and vice-versa.
  18. Really important question: How common is it for girls to like JUST ONE girl and no others. To feel repulsed at the idea of other girls touching her but having strong feelings for one particular girl. For it to feel different with that girl, like it's not a lesbian relationship, like it's just 'right' and whilst everyone else outside the relationship would see just two lesbians together, it doesn't feel like that to the girl in the relationship. It just feels normal. (i.e not being lesbian and not being bisexual. Fancying lads but also ONE girl on the whole planet and not finding any other women remotely attractive.) So is this normal? To not fancy any other girls AT ALL or even think mmm she's nice. But to fancy this one girl, but not really feel like you're fancying a girl. How many people have experienced this? Is this common? Thankyou to anyone who gives their opinion.
  19. I'm not really confused about my orientation but my bestfriend said I'm bicurious when I told her that occasionally I watch lesbian porn. well maybe once a week at least. I know my orientation is straight. i'm physically and emotionally attracted to guys. am i really bicurious or what? but i still like to believe I'm straight. thats possible right? because you can still be straight and watch lesbian porn. right?
  20. I've been on the receiving end of a lot of unwanted crushes from guys, but this is the first time I've ever had to deal with a girl. I've had a few major crushes on girls before so I know how it feels and I know how much rejection stings, but I just want nothing to do with this girl. She's not my type whatsoever and she's likely a few years younger than me. I'm about 99% sure she's a lesbian, somewhat from stereotypes, but also my own gaydar. She hasn't come outright and said anything, but it's painfully, painfully obvious. She's in one of my university classes, a class that has a higher percentage of females. I remember taking notice of her my very first day. Not because I was interested, but because I could feel her glancing at me from a short distance. I've even caught her staring, but she looked away each time. Then each class after the first, she seemed to pop up everywhere. If I left the class during break to get something to eat, she was right behind me. Always, always somewhere within range of me and staring. I know from my own experience of falling for people I don't think I can have, everything she's doing is signs of a crush. At first I thought I might just be imaging things and had to get over myself, but it's been six months of all the same kind of stuff. I don't want to go into too much detail because she could very well read these boards, but basically every week she makes it a point to stick around class later than she has to while I'm there. And really, I have no clue what to do. She's making me uncomfortable from a distance because it feels sort of creepy stalkerish. I almost wish she'd just come out and say something, but we aren't friends and really have no reason to ever speak to one another. There's no way in hell I'm initiating the conversation because it'll make her think I'm interested. I could definitely survive until the end of the year and then hopefully never have a class with her again, but I guess I feel bad for her sort of. On a more positive note, it does, in a way, make me feel sort of good because maybe this means I'm putting out "vibes" and one day I'll attract someone I'm actually interested in. haha. What have you guys done in the past with an unwanted crush?
  21. I just recently had the experience of watching the movie Better Than Chocolate and wanted to share with everyone how wonderful it is! I don't usually watch many gay/lesbian movies because I'm just coming to terms with my own lesbian identity and have always felt uncomfortable for some reason watching things like this. But this movie just blew me away, it made me feel empowered and just really good afterwards. I loved the openess of the whole movie and it gave me hope that I can have something like that myself. I was just very inclined to write in here to reccommend this movie to those who havent already seen it because it was really inspiring and I wanted to pass it on to others! Does anyone else have any other great hay/lesbian movies that they've seen? I've been looking in to renting some more but a lot of them seem to be more drama filled and I'd much rather watch a comedy or romantic comedy type of movie. Any ideas??
  22. hey ppl sorry i this is going to be really short or if its really long but my g/f(im a lesbian) of 2 and a half years just broke up with me the day before valentines day and i am having a hard time handling it becuase she broke up with me because she wants to be with a guy and it hurts really bad because she is supposedly lesbian to so i dont know what to do anymore i have ended up in the hospital twice so if that means anything to you if you could help me out by giving me some advice on how to kinda get over it it would be greatly appreciated:sad: :splat:
  23. Let me start by saying I adore women. I have always been attracted to women. I love everything about them. I am and have been out as a lesbian since I was 17. That's what makes what happened so weird... I work with a man that I became friends with. He is about 10 years older than me. We would go out and have drinks sometimes. We had a lot in common, we both liked talking about girls. I never considered hooking up with him, but there was always a "spark" between us, even though he new I was a lesbian. There was something about him I could not get over. He's married w/kids. We talked a lot about his marriage. He is in a marriage that is friendly, but not loving. They stay together for the kids, are polite to eachother, but are not in love, don't have sex, etc. He genuinely cares for her, but he seems very lonely. He is caring, funny, smart, honest, handsome, and very open minded. Well, we had been drinking a bit one evening and we ended up having sex. I was the aggressor. He was the most amazing person I had ever been around. I was the most mind blowing, sensual, experience I have ever had. I have never had an orgasm like this before. I have orgasmed with girls, but this was multiple orgasms that left me shaky for 20 - 40 min. It's like our bodies work perfectly together. I have not had sex with a man since high school. We continued to hook up for sex because it was so incredable. We both were clear that this was just for sex, and it was for a while. This is where it gets really weird... I am completely in love with him. And I can tell he loves me. The way he talks to me, touches me, respects me. We can talk about anything. He is very manly and very feminine at the same time. He cares about issues with women. His touch gives me goosebumps. He makes me feel amazing when he smiles at me. I just want to be around him all of the time. I was sure that I could never be with a man, relationship wise. But now I don't know. I've never felt this way before and I'm 28. I thought I was a lesbian. I am still a lesbian..I think. I don't understand how this could happen. Can amazing sex cloud your mind and change you? I'm so confused. I want him. I want him to leave his wife and have a relationship with me. I think this is the person I could spend the rest of my life with. I know it's wrong, and I don't care. I feel like a horrible person. Am I still a lesbian? There are so many feelings inside of me. Am I turning my back on what I really believe in? It just feels so right to me. I have told a couple of my friends and they are mad at me - they can't stand men. Life has really mixed me up here.
  24. Hello to all of you. I have that kind of problem. I think im in love with the sister of my friend. And im not sure but i think she shows also a little intrest in me. Before she never talked to me when i was by my friend his home. But the first time when i talked to her i felled excited. I think she also did feel like that. Because she smiled but i saw at her face that she was very nervous and uncertain and when she was breathing i saw that her heart beat was at least 2x faster than it normally should. im 26 and she is 29. Like i said i dont know if she is interested but when i was talking with my friend, she was also participating at our conversation for mor than 1h and 30 min. till she had to go for some sport with her G/F. I know from my friend that she is single for almost 10 years. The questions that i have is: Could it be that she is lesbian because she is single for so long? And otherwise how can i know if she is lesbian or not without confronting her too mutch. because that would be a nigative point for me if it isnt like that. I bought a house and i asked my friend if she would be interested to come and watch it. he told me she wouldn't do that but when we 3 had a conversation i asked them sidewise if they would like to see my house and she also wanted to see it. Next question is how should i give her my phone number without losing sight and second toughts from her? Thx already for some reply's
  25. LOL, so much stuff is going on in my life right now that it's confusing me!Yesterday started out to be a normal average day & I went out with a group of friends. We all went to a mall & we sat at the food court where we always have discussions. It seems like everytime, the subject of homosexuality will come up. One of my friends who's a girl, brought the subject up of seeing an old high school friend we all knew from school. She went on to say how our friend came out to her & said that she was now gay! All of my friends made a big deal out of it & they just carried on for like forever. I sat there quietly & I made a statement saying that why should homosexuality be such a big deal? If she is gay now so be it, it doesn't change the fact that she's still a decent human being. As soon as I said that,everybody got quiet & the girl who who brought the subject up gave me this weird look. The subject quickly changed & it was forgotten. Later that night I gotta call from the same girl who brought the subject up.We talked for a very long time & it was strange because we're never on the phone for such a long period of time. Eventually she brought the subject of me seeing anybody right now at the moment. I quickly said that I was happy being single at the moment & that there really wouldn't be any time for any relationships right now due to the fact of me working & starting college in the fall. She went on to say that you don't have to be in a serious relationship right now but you can just mess around, which I thought was something ignorant to say. I told her that's not how I roll & I'm looking for someone with substance. Shortly after that the subject of homosexuality came up again & she went on to say that so many people are turning gay today, it's almost like a trend. I told her that for some people it is & for others it really isn't.She went into a usual speech about it not being normal & basically those type of people are mentally ill & such. That aggravated me by what she said & I was like well everybody is different & that's what makes the world so unique. I went on to say that not everybody can be the same, not everyone can be straight.She was like true but she really think it's choice! Then she was like, you're not gay are you? It shocked me when she asked me & I told her no.I didn't have the guts to tell her yes & I wish I told her the truth just to see her response. She was like oh ok. She was like none of my friends are turning gay, if any of my friends change on me, we're going to fix that. I laughed & I was like how exactly would you fix a gay person? She said easy, I'll just set them on a date with the opposite sex & they'll realise what they're missing! LMAO, I really gotta kick out of that response I was like if only it were that simple & she was like it really is that simple! For the rest of the night, she kept making gay references to things & it was annoying. We were watching tv shows & everything was basically, that's so gay or whatever? She asked me if I watch any lifetime shows. I was like no not really, she was like you should start watching them. She was like there are so many good shows on there. She went on to say that she really doesn't know any straight males that watch lifetime. I was like yeah me either lol. Then at another time out of no where, she asked me if I know that they have a playgirl for women. I was basically like I was aware of that. She said she would love to get her hands on one just to look at the men. I think she was trying to get a response out of me basically but it didn't work at all! She confuses me! I think she has a very big clue that I am gay but I'm really not sure how she'd react if I told her I was.What makes it so funny is that I think she's a lesbian because she has this tomboyish way about her sometimes but I know that's not a good sign that she's a lesbian.She gave me mixed signals last night & I'm pretty sure she was trying to make me come out of the closet. She said that she would fix her friends if they came out, what kind of crap is that? Was she serious & does she really believe that going out on a date with the opposite sex would fix matters LOL! Anyway I'm not phased by it but I'm a little puzzled about where exactly is she coming from....
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