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Hello I need opinions on my situation or I will start being anxious again. Me and my boyfriend were together for over 1,5 years, and I was planning to move abroad to my home country next year. He broke up with me around 1,5 months ago because he didnt want neither of us get more hurt by staying longer together and then me leaving in the end. We stayed in contact and still met very often. A bit later on I got the courage to say I want to stay in the country and that I made a mistake by leaving, I told him about my decision about staying and he was not happy about it and just very confused. I was very desperate and pushy towards him and he got scared really. Later I found out he was seeing and talking to other girls while we were still meeting up, even though we were not together. I got really mad and things led to him blocking me everywhere and he said he doesnt want anything to do with me. I believe the reason he was upset to me as well, was because I i saidI want to stay is that he already in his mind broke up with me months ago knowning that I would be leaving. And it took me this long to realize that I need to want to stay in the country, I was in a crisis. It took him a long time to process in his mind that I am leaving and it was hard for him to actually break up with me and it took 4 months for him to do it. I stopped contact and I went on a vacation for 2 weeks and he contacted me again and apologized and saying he wants to talk again when I come back and to take things slow but not to have any high expectations. We agreed to stay exclusive and not to see other people. He came to pick me from the airport and we talked a bit and slept together, the next day we talked more and same thing happened. He texts me everyday and we met 2 times more last week. Each time we talked a bit about what happened and what we both expect, he says he cant make a decision yet because doesnt want us to break up like last time. He was upset and angry that we "argued" again about whats happening because I was maybe expecting too much. He said he is afraid if we move on too quick we will end up arguing again because he still loves and cares for me, but at the same time he thinks its hard to get back how we used to be. He is texting me every day to say good morning and helping me with the process of getting an apartment. Also he is planning a vacation for us together. Everything sounds like something a couple would do? However I see can tell the way he is texting his emotional barrier is still up and I can feel how reserved he is, I am too afraid to ask him to hang out I dont want to see too clingy. He is very busy with his hobby and we can only see each other on the weekends really. He always used told me "If i wouldnt love you I wouldn't be spending all this time with you and stay all week at your place." Now there just isnt really time for me and Im afraid there wont be, am I maybe expecting too much at this point. He is making initiatives all the time and to meet up this weekend, but at the same time it was nothing like we used to be. I feel sick of being this anxious and cant focus normally in my life, I would like to be as "chill" as he is about this. Its been a rollercoaster between us, and now its been around 1 month since I told him I will stay and would like to try again. I am afraid we wont be able to proceed without relationship if we wont see each other frequently, maybe I am just being very un patient, but its been a long emotional road to this point. How long should I give him time to figure out if we should be officially together? Should I play hard to get and let him chase me to get the excitement back again? Or should I just be myself and plan things together, asking him out? Anyone has any idea what I should do, please share your experiences.
My ex boyfriend broke up with me 3 months ago. We work together so I have to see him everyday. Its been hard moving on. First month and a half we had no contact. Then I decided to text him and we've been texting ever since. However when I bring up us being friends he agrees to be platonic friends but tells me he's not interested in a relationship with anyone right now. He replies to all my texts and tells me he's ok with us being friends but whenever I mention possibly hanging out he says its not a good idea. Why does he keep texting me and agreeing to being platonic friends if he knows I want to get back together with him?
I used to date this guy, who I still have crazy feelings for. I'll give a detailed background on what our relationship was like. So I had a crush on him initially, and I confessed to him, and he accepted it, and initially, it was so sweet, we really got along, had similar life ambitions, and just in general, the relationship was really smooth, we contacted each other a lot, it was amazing, I was really happy. Then slowly, he started taking longer while responding to my texts, sometimes 2 days sometimes 3, I was tired of being the only one putting in all the effort and I had a lot on my plate as well, with regards to extra curricular activities, and everything, and so we mutually agreed to break up. Around few weeks later, after I was done with all my work, he contacted me and asked me if we could call. We called and talked for 5 hours straight, and all my old feelings came back to me. We called each other the next day, and we sang songs to each other, it was just amazing. Then a few days later he tells me, "I've been trying not to date people much, but I feel like Im falling in love with you, and you're the first girl I've decided to date in 2 years, what should I do?" I was obviously really happy at that, and I confessed back too, then he asked me out, and we started dating. This time we dated longer than we did in the past, and I swear to god, I was the happiest I've ever been till date. He'd even sacrifice his sleep for me, if I'd been busy, I'd tell him, "I'll be done at this time" he'd come at that time, and we'd talk for hours and hours. We both would sacrifice our sleep, mealtimes, etc just so we could talk, and that'd be my joy everyday. I actually have hormonal issues, so I get terrible mood swings sometimes, so I shouted at him twice for doing nothing at all. But he was still patient with me, and kept saying "sorry" even when he did nothing wrong. Once we were playing a game, and we lost consecutively 5 times, because of me, and he told me "you don't know anything about this game at all, you should do this in this situation and that in that situation" but I was mentally on a low at that time, so I didn't even accept anything he said, and told him, "you're being really mean to me" when he wasn't even being mean, and then he got mad too, and said "oh i am being mean? you told me you don't want to play this game, and you're playing just to spend time with me, but honestly it's a burden, because we are losing just because of you, you're not fun at all, you should just stop playing this game." I was really sad :(( and i told him that, then he said "im really sorry". I dont know why, but I kept trying to put in so much effort after that fight, he stopped making time for me, but I still kept sacrificing like before, so that our relationship works out, but it looked like he was already tired of me, he slowly went back to not replying for days and days, and when i told him that he just said "im sorry" when I asked him to break up with me, he just said "im sorry". I was really really sad about it and wanted the pain to end, so I left him a long message, telling him, how someone else could have treated me better, and saying stuff like, "I hope we don't talk again, you have hurt me so much" and blocked him on all socials. After three weeks, I found out that he got one of my socials from my friend, and told me, "i am sorry about what I did, please unblock me so that we can talk" he sounded really desperate and told me he was looking for me for a long time, and wanted to apologize for everything, and I apologized to him for everything I said too. Again, at the start we were talking a lot, and everything, he even told me personal things. I was kind of shocked when he told me about his sex drive, and how it being abnormally high bothered him, but I thought maybe he really trusted me as a friend and he said it, so I told him to consult a doctor, then he did, and then he took my suggestions for stuff like what he should gift his mom for her birthday, it was happy. But now again, he has gone back to not responding to me, like before, and I'm sorry, but I still have feelings for him, and I really really want to know, if it is worth investing any more time, into this. Yesterday I told him, "Please reject me so that I can move on" but he hasn't responded to that message yet, and I don't know how long he is going to take this time, maybe even a month. I just want to know if it is worth continuing to love him and wait for him to come back again, or should I just stop all contact with him for a few months and let this go. I have never felt this way about anyone before, so I am really in a mental turmoil because of this. I am so sorry this ended up being so long ╥ _ ╥