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About Me

Mod Notes

  1. THE CIVIL WAR The nation is rent asunder. Truculent factions marshal their arguments against one another. In one camp, the confident general maps her route relying on sheer gut. She hoists the banner of your nigh and certain return at the conclusion of your present engagements. She refuses to negotiate with her challenger. Across the battlefield encamps the anxious opponent. She is chary to trust the cries of her heart, for her troops sustained heavy casualties in the last conflict when she heeded such advice. She seeks to rely not on instinct but on intelligence-gathering. Your final words convince her of your desertion. The weary-limbed soldiers have seen pitched battle for days now.
  2. I am in a huge delima. Me and this girl (who had 2 children already), got engaged quickly. She had been wishy-washy about commitment and made a few mistakes (cheating, but not sex.) I bought a mobile home for us to live in (it was cheaper than rent) and my best friend who ran the park put it in my name, just "in case." We have had our problems, on and off. We each said, "Don't do this" (a limit) and we each kept doing it for reasons as feeling no other option, etc. (no more cheating, though) Recently, she did soemthing she shouldn't have done and I did something I souldn't have done and she ended the relationship, yet again (it's happened more than 10 times.) Except this time it was over for her. She no longer cared for me the way she used to and didn't want to "Try and work on us" when she didn't care to be with me. Regrettibly, I understand not wanting to if you don't feel the same. Within a week she started dating someone, while we were still living together. That really hurts. She was a full time student with a part time job. She got help with student loans and grants. I had a full time sales job and made good money. I had ok (well, kinda ok credit) and she has excellent credit. We used her credit to get the things we wanted and mostly my income to pay for it. About 1 month before we broke up, I found an online opportunity and we used her credit to start it (about $1,500) I have been able to support us the same as before, but now staying at home. NOW THE ISSUE We have been talking about how to start physically seperating and have had some problems. We don't make enough money for either of us to live separately, unless I get a job to pay for my own apartment. This completely sucks, because I have been working 12 years to finally NOT have a regular job. I asked my cousin (who is kind and not bitter), what I should do. He said I should give her 30 days to find a place to live and she needs to move. We aren't married. (I am more pissed at the supposed unconditional commitment of being engaged and promising to each other that even though we may feel different about each other sometimes, we owe it to the other person to try and resolve what is causing the unhappiness.) The only place she can go is her mother's, which is a BAD place for 2 children to grow up in. Now I don't know what to do. Everyday is a constant reminder of someone who gave up on me and the children I used to be a father to and something needs to change. But at whose expense? I honestly want to say, "It's not my problem now." She was living before me and I would take all the debt until she could repay it. She says life would be really stressfull if she had to start working more and had to move and she feels like this house is hers too. The house is with my credit. She also suggested I move back to Dallas and live with my parents, since it would be free. I feel like I don't owe her anything any more. "My heart changed and I can't control that" isn't an excuse for no consequences. Even if you didn't intend it. Any advice on the seperating situation would be greatly appreciated.
  3. Hi, I have been dating this girl for about 2 years, she and I have a lot in common and often have a good time together, however we have also had numerous arguments over the course of our relationship, I understand that disagreements are normal however I think we have more than normal and a lot of our arguments are not necessary and I am not interested in getting married to someone that I argue with all the time. Most recently I told her that if the arguments would stop then we would get engaged, things stopped for awhile but have begun to creep back up, and in our last argument I am not happy with her telling me that she believes my mother (who has a medical illness history longer than any AMA publication, she is doing better now) is faking her current condition, also she hates my sisters, and if we were married I would not be able to help my family members if needed(just random stuff-moving boxes, simple home repair etc) we even had one argument over the phone because I asked her to let me call her back because I wanted to go back into my mothers hospital room to say good luck to her before the orderly rolled her away to have some test done......her argument was I just saw the woman, why do I need to see her again before she has some "f-ing" test done. She often has these outburt which will last for a hour or longer before I can get off the phone, but will often (not all the time) call back to apologize in some form, either for what she said or to change her words to what she "really" meant......in any case, please tell me what you guys think, should I continue in this relationship and get engaged or just end it?
  4. Ive posted on here before but never really to ask this kind of advice.... I really need to know if there is anything I can do to try and win my Ex back. We dated for almost 3 years when we were younger. Then we grew up and remained friends for a while until I met someone else and that person made me stop being friends with my Ex. I ended up getting engaged and then ending my engagement but now I am single and enjoying life. Two months ago when I was having issues I decided to write my ex and he was super excited to hear from me but only because he was having issues with his girlfriend. But now that he is not having issues with his girlfriend he wants me to kinda sit on the back burner. I really care about him and I want advice on how to win him back... Is there anything i can do?
  5. Me and my girlfriend of two months have been talking about getting engaged. During the last two months I have seen her every day including weekends. We just can't seem to get enough of each other. She's my best friend and lover. I'm crazy for her, and she for me. Within the first couple of dates I had the idea in my head that this is the woman that I will marry one day. She says the same thing. I'm still a little dumbfounded that I met her and it feels and looks like a match made in heaven. She's 22 and I'm 31 and at first I was exceptionally sceptical but rationally I think that this can work. We agreed that we'll get engaged this December and get married within a year from then. Today she asked me if we could do it within two weeks. I have no idea what brought this on. After some talk I said that I feel that it would be to soon and that I think it would be better to wait until December. It looked like this sent the alarm bells going off with her. After some more talk I asked her to give me a day or two to think. I'm not sure what to do now, as I feel that I've known her only two months and that it's to soon. Is it to soon? I'm also a little worried about what my parents and her parents will say about it (because it's so soon) and this will very likely not carry the acceptance of my parents or hers.
  6. I broke up with my girlfriend about a couple months ago, but soon afterwards I started to regret it. I found out soon after we broke she met someone new. Well I just found out the other day that she is engaged. I feel like an idiot, why did I have to do that?? I could have been the one engaged to her, but no things got all messed up. Why can't things just work out for me? I lost my job last week, and now this. When are things going to start looking up for me? Do I have anything to look forward to at all? Such a sad, cruel, unfair world we live in. end of emo rant
  7. My ex broke up with me 4 days ago (after 4 jear relationship) and now she is seeing someone... And I can't be less bothered by it! Im not jelous even when she tells me she's seeing him... When I think how they'll have sex... I feel nothing towards her! We ware engaged! Does that mean that I didn't felt anything (but I cried and you know what for the past 4 days, but today I feel strange), that I was afraid of being the dumpee or what? Is this normal? Am I normal? Does that have anything to do with the fact she cheated on me (with someone third...)? The fact that she cuted her beutiful long black hair and painted it blue (well she's natural blonde but...)? I'm afraid of this! (not exactly but you got the point)
  8. You’ve fallen from the pedestal where I held you up above, My vision no longer impaired by the blinding of your ‘love’. Once engaged by your façade, adorned with your angelic smile and welcoming eyes, I now clearly see, beneath your chameleon camouflage, the depth of your lies. Another victim to your trap, entangled in the web you so intricately spun, Playing people as pawns in a game they had no chance to have won. Broken is a heart from the callous and malicious intent of your ways, Never sincere were your actions nor the words you thought to convey. You’re a lost soul plagued by immaturity and an identity unknown, For, time will heal my wounds but reap for you what you’ve sewn.
  9. Is marrying at a young age a bad idea? My friend is 24 yrs old, and has been dating a guy for a year and a half, and they're getting married in June. He is in the army and stationed up in Alaska, so she moved up there to be with him and now they're engaged. I just have a bad feeling about this for some reason, and was wondering what you guys think.
  10. Hi Guys, I'm sort of confused about a girl that I've had an interest in for about three months now. I can handle any kind of criticism or honesty so if you feel she has no interest whatsoever, PLEASE let me know. I don't want to keep spinning my wheels on somebody that may not be interested and think I'll only lose her respect if I were to do that. First, I think I'll by clear and honest by saying that I work with her currently -- although that won't be a factor for long because I have been offered several other jobs and am just looking to pick the one that "fits". Three months ago, when I first had an interest, she wouldn't go ANYWHERE with me. Walk accross the street, lunch, to another office -- NOWHERE. It usually takes me a while to get to know or like someone, though, so for about the first two months of her being there, I rarely ever said a word. I can readily say about anything around her now and can do a play fight routine where I act as though I'm about to punch her or kick her and will get a laugh and a, "don't practice you're wrestling moves on me." It's nothing uncommon now for a playful "high five" to take place -- sometimes several times a day. The smiles can be on and off but, normally, I can get a smile out of her fairly easily. I'm not certain that it matters, but she laughs at me a lot. Today, for example, we went out to eat during lunch and she walked in the door and I was sort of shuffled out and ended up holding the door open for other people and noticed her clapping and laughing to the waitress (apparently about the fact that I was sort of shuffled out). There were several bench's and I took a seat in one of them (that had an open seat next to it), but she sit in the bench beside me. We talked about several subjects and somehow, an ex-girlfriend come up which was met with a FROWN by her. She seemed to warm right back up, though, and we had a pretty nice lunch with the exception of one STUPID (Hey, I'll admit) remark I made... I noticed a ring on her finger (that finger) and, somewhat crushed, asked, "So, when's the big day?" She responded with, "The big day??", and I said, "Well, I see the ring." She laughed and said, "This isn't an engagement ring, this is my university class ring" (I only saw the backside of it and not the front so, as far as I knew, it could be any ring). I then just sort of casually said, "Well, he's lucky anyways", to which she responded, "I'm not getting married... This isn't an engagement ring" and laughed. From there, she just sort of talked about a graduate degree, one day possibly moving, and other things she would like to do with her life. She asked about my goals -- which are similar -- and seems to be interested in some of the things I say. She does have a great memory as she can quote things back (or ask about things I've talked about in the past) with ease. I'm a huge NFL fan and also enjoy video games and she'll regularly mention seeing something to do with one or the other to me. We have always taken my truck to do things in the past, but if I ever mention something I need to do (or whatever), she'll always say, "I can pick you up." Finally... as for e-mails and telephone calls... I've only called her on the phone once before which mostly was just a lot of laughing from both of us. She may or MAY NOT respond to my e-mail, but it's usually met with a response. She also seems pretty "joking" toward me. Alright, I think I've included about everything going on between us (good and bad) and am just curious if any of you can help me distinguish whether or not she has an interest level and what I should do, etc. I don't really WANT to be in a serious relationship while I still work there (as it could be disasterous for us both -- especially for her considering she'll be staying) but definitely want her to know she is somebody I would want to consider having a serious relationship with at some point (which is what I hoped the conversation about the ring would have done). Am I screwing anything up that I could be doing differently? I would rather just be myself as it feels more "right". Thanks, NASCARfan30534
  11. I feel so embarrassed to even be posting this, and this is going to be beyond long... ok, so I have never been one of the girls who was hounding her boyfriend to pop the question since becoming exclusive or had planned their Barbie dream wedding since age 10, in fact I dread having to deal with all the crap that goes along with having a wedding. However, that hasn't stopped me from feeling like my heart is ripped in half whenever one of my or my boyfriend's friends gets engaged. There tends to be a surge every 6 months (summer and Christmas) and during the '06 summer surge and two more of his friends jumped onto the engagement train my boyfriend decided he wanted to get me a promise ring. We had been dating for about 2 1/2 years at that point, I'm 20 and he was almost 24 so I figured it wasn't a bad idea since while everyone getting engaged was in our age range (and in most cases dating less time than we had been) I still felt like it was too soon. Fast forward to the end of the year. As he's asking me to start scout out ring styles, like literally as I am loading up sites I find out one of my friends my age who had only been dating her boyfriend 10 months had already gotten her engagement ring setting. I just broke down crying, and I really couldn't figure out why. I know my friend was still clearly in the "honeymoon" stage but it still crushed me and I felt so horrible and embarrassed when I had to explain why I couldn't bring myself to look up promise rings. This wasn't like me, I'm not supposed to care about this. He said he wouldn't give me one if it was going to make me unhappy but I said no it was fine, I thought it was. Christmas comes and no surprise, I get a promise ring from my boyfriend. I think the fact that it came in the wrong size and way too big to wear helped set the stage of me being uncomfortable with it. I wear it on my left ring finger (since it was also going to double as a "please don't hit on me I'm taken" signal) Christmas goes and two more friends are engaged, and one of his friends who had only been dating her boyfriend for a few months got a promise ring too. Again, this hurt me so much for no good reason. I don't even know if I want my friends to notice I got one because I know it's going to lead to wondering why I'm not engaged, and I don't think I could really handle having to admit to everyone I'm just too immature to be engaged if this is how I am reacting to everyone else's. This weekend. I was spending the night at my boyfriend's house and definitely three sheets to the wind after more booze than I probably should have had. Checked my Myspace and the friend from two paragraphs prior just got engaged. I completely break down crying. I don't quite remember everything since I was fairly drunk at this point, but I had no choice but to have to explain to my boyfriend what was bothering me. And I felt so embarrassed, so stupid and like this little immature girl who can't feel anything but jealous. I couldn't understand why I, the rational scientific one was breaking down and crying like a baby over something so petty. And I started wondering, what do all our friends have that we don't? Why am I the only one who is too immature to be engaged by the 3 year mark? With one exception of a couple that's a less than functional LDR with no end in sight, we don't know ANYONE in our circle of friends who dated for as long as we did before a proposal. And for some stupid reason, it hurts. I should also add that talking about marriage and all that jazz isn't a complete surprise to my boyfriend. I have already made it quite clear I refuse to move in together until I am engaged because I watched my cousins get into that trap and 6 years later and it's still just "getting the milk for free." I am going to start grad school in either Jan or Sept '09 (did I mention that a few of our engaged friends are looking at dates LATER THAN THAT to get married? that also just stabs me in the heart!) and if that's the route we're going to go down I'd like to be married either shortly before or within a semester of starting grad school so I can get on his insurance and honestly, maybe I'm just old fashioned like that and don't see a need to go out of my way to not get married when I go to grad school because I "need the experience of the single life" or whatever. My boyfriend and I decided we're going to start premarital counseling soon because it seems silly to me to start that AFTER you already set a date and start throwing money around before being 115% certain it's going to stick, and also agreed to order some books online - does anyone have any recommendations for books either as a couple or of the "yes you are not the only girl who isn't all smiles and gumdrops about getting engaged/married." I'm so lucky that he's accepting of my stupid girl jealousy, but I wish I knew how I could just shut that part of me off until it's my turn. I wish I knew how to not be mentally calculating how long they've been together and ages and deciding whether or not I "measure up." I wish I could not be ashamed of getting a promise ring when everyone else is getting the real thing, which is something I've always associated with high schoolers and people who still measure their relationship in months. I just wish I was mature enough to be engaged and not freak out about it. I know I'm not mature enough otherwise I wouldn't be getting so unhappy, and I hope I can find a way to get past that so I'm not a miserable wreck every time I watch someone pass me by and get engaged younger than us after dating less time than us... If anyone read all that, wow. If it wasn't the internet I'd give you a cookie.
  12. So my bf and I are both in our mid-20's and we've been together for about 1.5 years. We've had some issues at the beginning but we've managed to work out out and besides that we don't really fight that often and in my opinion everything is going really well. As I start thinking about my future I couldn't help but start wondering where this relationship will be headed. We haven't really talked about it or anything but it seems like my bf is extremely sensitive to the word "marriage". A lot of our friends are either married, have kids, or engaged. Sometimes our friends will joke around and ask when he's going to propose, and when that happens he immediately went on the defensive and starts going off saying "whoa! I'm not even thinking about that right now!" We went out this past weekend with a couple that's engaged and as a joke my friend asked if I wanted to try on her ring just for fun. As soon as my bf saw that, he immediately tried to push me away and said "whoa, I don't think so!" There has been other similar accidents and it really made me have doubts about our relationship. I can't really get a good read on him and I don't want to be the one to bring this up. I think I'd be really sad if we were to be together for another year or two but find out that he doesn't even want to marry me. Sometimes I feel like that maybe I am just wasting my time . . . I know, selfish of me. But I think I am just tired of going on dates and going thru relationship after relationship and I just want to settle down and not having to worry about that kind of stuff. ARe there nybody out there in a similar situation??
  13. I have always believed that relationships are great regardless of gender, color etc, just so long as no-one gets hurt. I also feel that people have the right to have sexual relations with whoever they feel comfortable so long as no-one gets hurt. For myself I've always believed in monogamy in a relationship. Here's the problem...I met someone online, we got on well and it was great. I found out fairly early on in the relationship, about 2 months on, that he is bisexual because I saw a profile of one of his screen names I found while using his computer. I asked him about it, he was pretty straightforward about his attractions and said that since the breakup of a long term relationship he decided to explore that side of him that he has known for many years, since childood. After 3 years of being together we moved in together with my 2 children. Two years later I find that he had still be explorig the internet, advertising online for encounters. We're very rarely apart & I'm fairly certain he never actually met anyone. He denied ever meeting anyone but did enjoy looking at the porn sites. None of the porn sites were of women. I told him that I wanted to break off our engagement and he promised he wouldn't do anymore internet searching. Then I discovered he was doing it again last year. I was away for about 3 weeks & I found out he had signed up for free AOL (denied he knw anything about it), had secret profile & was advertising himself. He infact said he had done it for all the years we've been together. The problem is, I feel insecure, I feeel guilty for stopping him from acting on his urges. He wants to marry me and says he has stopped any of the internet stuff. Short of spyware, I have no way of knowing that is true. He is a sensitive, intelligent, kind person who says he loves me and will be faithful forever. I need advice. I feel sick.
  14. Was with my ex for 3+ years, nearly engaged, same story most of you have. Have had NC (with the exception of a bday email I sent her two weeks ago) for 2 months. In that time I started seeing someone, casual dating at first but now she wants more. I like her very much-she's fun, very, very kind to me, and not bad to look at. However, I'm finding myself unable to emotionally open up. I suppose the reason is obvious; two months is hardly time to recover from a relationship of 3+ years. My question is this: am I doing more harm to myself by dating rather than being alone? Is the loneliness I feel when I'm apart from people too high a price to pay for the fun I have when I'm with her?
  15. Do engagement rings have to be diamond for it to be considered an "engagement ring"? My boyfriend has been talking of getting me a ring for Christmas all year, and I think he wants to get me my birthstone (December)... but he also added the comment tonight that he doesnt think an engagement ring has to be diamond, its whatever I like the most. What do you guys think?
  16. For those who don't know, I'm 16 and 32 weeks pregnant with a baby boy. I'm engaged to a great guy who it taking full responsibility for my son (it's a long story but he's not the biological father) and we're planning on getting married once I turn 18. I know it sounds really selfish of me, but I still want to join the New Jersey National Guard. I've been interested in it for a few years now. My best friend's brother was killed in Ramadi in November of 2004 and we became best friend's soon after. As soon as he graduates, he's going into the Marines to follow in his brother's footsteps. My fiance was only a few weeks away from signing the final papers to join the Army when we got engaged and he decided not to continue with the Army. The US Services has always seemed appealing to me but I know now with a son on the way, I could never join the Marines and be away from him for that long. Still, I would like to join the National Guard when I turn 18. Is it selfish of me to do so for my son and fiance? I haven't actually talked to Ian about it so I do not know where he stands on the issue. Please give me your opinion on the situation. It's greatly appreciated.
  17. Well, I haven't posted on her for some time, but I'm glad to see that the site is still around. A couple of years ago, everyone on here helped me get through a really tough break-up. And, now I am engaged to a beautiful young woman, who is intelligent, kind, caring, etc. For me, she is a total package. Here's the weird thing... We have been dating for about 1 1/2 years, and engaged since June of 2006, and the wedding plans are under way. But, I keep thinking of one of my ex's, from a long time ago...my first love. I dated this girl for about 8 months, 8 years ago, and have always kept her in my heart. But, over the years, as time went on, she has popped in and out of my mind. But, more recently she has been on my mind a lot, and I don't know what this means. Can anyone help me out? I also have to add that I talk with her a couple times a year through MySpace. I setup an account to keep in touch with my college friends, and she e-mailed me out of the blue, about a year ago, after 6 years of not talking. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
  18. Ok, I'm just looking for some opinions on this one, let me know what you think! My issue regards one of my friends. We have been friends since Year 8 (10 years). We were close in high school, but she wasn't my best friend if you know what I mean. We have been in contact every now and then since high school finished (6 years ago) but over the last 6 months or so we have again become quite close. This is a result of having a mutual friend (also from high school) who we both hung out with so we became good friends through that. Now, that friend has moved so we are even closer. She also works with my bf so we are always at their work functions together. Let me say I love this girl, she is great, but at times she can get a bit dramatic. I don't really know how else to describe it except to say that when something happens that I think is kinda minor, she can get upset about it, crying etc. For example, if a guy she likes doens't call her or, or something, she then spends our whole night out analysing it and saying she's not good enough etc. She also always says stuff like 'You're so much prettier than me, guys always like you' etc (When really I think guys just like the fact that I'll have a nice chat to them without anything awkward being said; see below). This can be really draining, as I am a farily upbeat sort of person, and try not to sweat the small stuff, but I try to support her as best I can because I believe that even though something might seem minor to you, it can be very important to another person. She was dating a guy in high school and they stayed together for 6 years. She always said she was 'never 100% sure' if he was the one (even after all that time!) however, when he proposed after 6 years she said yes. A week after the engagement party, she slept with someone else. She also slept with someone lese while they were on a 'break' (hello, Ross and Rachel I don't judge her, she's my friend and she knows she made some mistakes. They obviously ended up breaking up, which believe me, I know is hard, regardless of the circumstances. The ex still doesn't know she cheated. They have been broken up for about 3 months and this is my main issue; she just won't let it go, not even a little bit, and any person (stupid enough!) to ask her anyhting about it (say we're out and someone we're talking to asks if she has a bf) gets a very bitter 'WELL, I WAS engaged but now I'm NOT, and I had to move out and now he has another gf'. The reaction from these people is generally severe uncomfortableness. I'm not suggesting she shouldn't be able to be honset but she doesn't realise that she sounds a little insane. I've actually had people say to me afterwards 'Oh my gosh, what's up with your friend? I was just making converstaion and she made me feel so uncomfortbale I didn't know what to say.' Yet she has no idea it makes people feel this way. I've kind of jokingly sai to her, 'not your best story ha ha' but she still does it. She even says it like that to guys she's trying to 'chat up'. I think she expects a lot of sympathy, but most people are just scared off and, right or wrong, they don't have a lot of sympathy, especailly when they find out it happened over 3 months ago. (Not that she should be 'over it' but still, she's pretty bitter, considering it was her decision). The hardest part is, she gets all teary about it and expects sympathy from me, which I do my best to provide but not only did SHE break up with HIM, she also cheated on him! Am I being unreasonable to find this tiring? Am I also being horrible to wish she would stop with the story? I'm not going to end the friendship or anything like that, I just wondered what others thought. Any thoughts?
  19. I've been dating this woman for 3 years. We broke up twice within the first 6 months, not for arguing or anything (we've never had an argument the whole time), but mainly because she was head over heels in love and I wasn't feeling it, so I felt guilty. She's 38 and I'm 47. She is beautiful too, and gets mistaken for someone in her mid 20's. So time went on, we got engaged, she moved in, lost her job, and it all went to hell in 6 months (I work from home, so we were basically together 24 hours a day, 7 days a week). The woman is wonderful in every way, except for her voice, and the fact that she talks too much...she sounds like she talks through her nose instead of her mouth all the time (if anyone knows how to improve that, PLEASE let me know.) We weren't happy...so we decided to break the engagement, then she moved into an apartment ( I helped all along, and we're still friends). I think I want to get back with her, but I'm unsure. She has a job now, we're just taking time apart to sort things out. I could never tell her about her voice, I really don't think it would be the right thing to do. But I miss her like crazy, and I don't want her to move on with someone else, or really start dating again. The voice is a big thing...and it is annoying to most people I know that have heard her, considering she could talk the ears off a brass monkey.... I would marry this woman in a minute if I could bring myself to like her voice...hypnosis maybe for me? What would you do in this situation? Tell her about the voice? Move on?
  20. Hey all, I just finally registered, but have enjoyed reading people's advice. It seems like most people give pretty good advice. So I thought I should ask for some too. I have been dating this girl for 1.5 yrs. I have the ring bought and everything, I even know how I'm gonna do this. Here's the thing, last week a friend of hers got engaged after like 6 months. I don't want to look like a copycat. So I was wondering how long to wait, if necessary. Also, she is taking a huge test this week, MCAT sort of thing, so I don't want to give a 'distraction' before it. We are taking a trip to Vegas right after the test, and I originally wanted to do it before that. I could do it in Vegas, but that wasn't my original plan. I don't want to give the impression that I am looking for excuses to wait, because I'm not. Any advice would be appreciated. I look forward to being a contributing member in the future.
  21. My boyfriend and I have been together for two years, and will most likely be engaged very soon. He is a fantastic man, except for one problem: he doesn't ever show his feelings, or do anything thoughtful at all. There is no attentiveness, birthday gifts, christmas gifts, flowers, surprises, the things that make us women feel so special...He claims that he used to be very emotional, and went way out of his way to make a girl feel special, but realized that it was pointless and stopped. Does that mean he's been hurt? He won't ever talk about it. Just gets mad and says that my expectations are too high...that I don't appreciate what he gives. How do I bring out a more sensitive, attentive man in him? Is it even possible?
  22. Hi how are you there ? i dated my ex for 2 years then we decided to break out becuase we both from diffrent religion so i told her to go and find the right guy from same religion as hers and 2 months after i told her that- she came up to me and told me that she wants to meet a guy that her girlfriend intrduced her to him , i told her go ahead and meet him if he is the right guy. she did !and said that she really liked him.and 2 months after they got engaged ,but during all that time she was still calling me and saying hi to me and evrytime she calls i feel so nervous becuase im missing her and i dont want her to be with anyone else even i told her to go and find the right guy .i think im still in love with her.but like one month ago i sent her a text msg telling her dont call me anymore becuase she is with someone else and i wished her the best in life .since then i havent heard from her anything ,what should i do ? becuase im missing her alot !! do you think she still in love with me?should i send her any email to see if she still thinking about me or she is totaly in love with that guy that she got engaged to.
  23. Hello everyone. Ive been on this site for about 2 years now. Im now under a new name so that my fiance wont get curious and start reading my posts again. Since weve been engaged (December 06) I have stumbled accross several emails that she has written to her ex boyfriend and his daughter. She left her email open one night and when I sat down at the PC i read bits and pieces of an email sent back and forth from his daughter. The main point in it was that my fiance still has feelings for him. During their exchanges I read that the only reason they split was because my fiances son was too wild for him and he dont and cant deal with kids his age. They were still seeing each other but on the outs when i came into the picture. My problem with this now is that I realize that my finance loves me and wants to marry me, but now with this info Im reading from her, will she still be interested in his relationships, and possibly dart at her opportunity to be with him since she still has those feelings for this guy? Should I confront her about him at all not saying i know about it, just ask about him? Or should I leave it alone and hope that shes in this for the right reasons? Im torn as what to do and I know all of you have great advice to give. My prior nick was perseverance_rules if you look up my old profile, you can see that ive dealt with cheating women too much now to let this slide so easy and on the verge of getting married again. Thanks for all the help in advance, and I will try to stay positive with all the feedback. Thanks!
  24. I was just talking to a friend, and shes gotten engaged to this guy shes met up with twice or so...its an arranged sort of thing with the families, happens quite a lot in their society. And apparently shes getting to know him now, and they talk a lot on the phone. ANd he actually told her that she should lose some weight. My friend is hardly a few pounds overweight...maybe a bit like Hilary duff but before she lost all that weight..do you remember her size then? Anyways, what shocks me is that they barely know each other, and he tells her that she needs to pull down. Do all guys think like this? Even if shes a little chubby? If thats the case, I need to hit the gym ASAP!!
  25. Newly engaged, set to be married in like...three months and a few weeks. I just got home from an evening at the pub that I have been going to for like...six years with my girlfriend...(whom I do not see very often now that I am in a relationship) My fiance saw his mate early this week by himself..and...I was invited out by my friend. The problem is, I realize that from now on...I cannot just go out and have fun without being accountable to someone anymore. I need to call, check in...frankly...I do not know if I like it. I don't mean that I want to flirt, see anyone else...yadda yadda...I meant, just go out with my girlfriends and be silly. I feel like I am 15 years old again and I broke curfew. (he and I are not living together yet...but I did promist to call when I was on my way home..) It was later than expected. He did not seem too happy with me. Do I need to even try to explain myself or apologize? I am a bit confused.
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