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Hello everyone and thank you for visiting this topic. My family is facing some problems right now related to my father behavior. Currently I am 24 years old and I am working remotely from home, living with my father and my mother. My older sister is married and my middle brother works abroad and I am the little son. The problem I am going to talk about does not involve bullying or anything of that kind, it's just something that is becoming annoying and I wish I could find a solution. My father is a retired man, taking good care of all of us. He has a little brother, who is the CEO of the company where my brother is employed. Of course he got him this job and it's been nearly 5 years. Since then, I am feeling like my father is becoming so needy, pleaser and clingy to my uncle. All of us noticed it. He wants to involve him in any kind of subject : If I am looking for an internship, he insists that we should take his advice. If I got an offer from some company or whatever, he wants me to share it with him. That's the case for all of the family members and not only me : For example, lately my brother came back for some vacations with us and he noticed that my uncle bought a new car, so he casually said that the car is good, but he didn't even take a good look at it. Later in the same day, my uncle called my father and guess what my old man told him ? He said that my brother was overwhelmed by the car and he wanted to wash it and drive it so much that he went crazy ... I hope you see my point here. Things are escalating and it's becoming ass kissing. He also treats my uncle's son, my cousin way better than he ever treated us. He is so friendly towards him and always jokes with him. He barely does that with me or my brother. My uncle never treats me, or my brother in that way, I respect him so much and we get along, but not in a friendly way. the same thing goes with my uncle's wife, which annoys my mother so much. I just can't stand it anymore. He makes us feel like lackeys. He just abandons all self worth and confidence and makes us look pathetic. I am 100% sure that if he had to choose between his family and his brother, he would go for his brother. He wants me to join my uncle's company so much too, which I never intend to do if this keeps up, because the ass kissing will evolve and that's the last thing I want. Even when I mentioned that I want to work in Japan, where my brother works, but in a different company, he tried to convince me not to because there is a possibility that my uncle will get mad because I went there without his approval and not in his company ... What the hell was that ? Believe me, it's driving me crazy even though I am a calm person. That is my decision to make and my uncle is not my father ! He did not help me in any way throughout my studies and I don't owe him anything, why the hell should I give up on something I want to experience or try, just to satisfy him ? You see ? I want to let out my anger at my father for his behavior. I want to yell at him so much to the point I am sure that It will end up with a serious argument and fight. Believe me it's affecting even my mental health. I will be graduating soon but my thoughts are concentrated on this instead of my graduation project. Finally, thank you so much for reading this towards the end. What do you suggest I do ? What do you think of my situation ? Thank you in advance
Hey y'all! Just for those that don't know me yet, I'm a 36-year-old woman and I live in a big city in Australia. When I was 13 years old, I was bullied at school and I started speaking to my high school counsellor. I thought she was really nice and helpful and I decided that when I "grow up", I wanted to have her job. In the last two years of high school I decided to study psychology, which I really enjoyed. I actually had a two hour long assessment once in my late 20's with a psychiatrist specialising in ADHD. I'd shown some milder symptoms of ADHD and my other psychiatrist suggested I do the assessment. It came out of the assessment that I probably do have it. But was not advised to take dexamthetamines due to having had mental health issues which are likely to be made worse by stimulant medication. So, couldn't really do much regarding the ADHD medication wise. I also wasn't 100% sure if I really had it because the psychiatrist didn't say it was 100% certain, but likely. I struggled really badly at university with concentration and time management. I did notice even pre mobile/cell phones or any social media that I couldn't really focus on reading text books. I'd sit in a cubicle in the library and keep reading the same page but it didn't seem to be sinking in that well. I didn't have a cell phone to distract me and I was alone, so I didn't actually have anything getting in the way of the reading. I couldn't focus on doing assignments except when I did them the night before or on the day they were due. Then I felt this surge of anxiety and stress that it had to be done and very quickly I would hone in on it and do it all in literally one go. I wouldn't sleep all night and I'd get it done. I was really good at writing and I got OK marks. I could have gotten pretty high marks I think if I didn't do everything at the last minute. I'm also obsessed with shopping and shop impulsively. I also am very bad at organising my house and hoard stuff. Anyway, it took me a long time but I got my university degree, a Bachelor of Arts with psychology major. I didn't continue to study psychology because it required a huge amount of statistics and data, and I was actually really bad at it. I hardly passed the statistics. I also took some time off my degree and I got qualifications at community college (TAFE). I got a Certificate 4 in Mental Health and Drugs and Alcohol and a Diploma of Disability. I really liked community college because it suited my learning struggles. It was very hands on where most of the assignments were very directly work related. E.g. Doing a presentation about a particular mental health service, presenting a case management plan for a fake client, things like that. There were a lot of role plays, where one person was the worker and one acted as the client and you practice actual techniques. You could also submit work late and as long as the work was satisfactory, you still passed. Eight years ago I did some volunteer work with a church mental health programme and in an art programme for people with disability. From there I got references and got actual paid work. Since 2013 I've been working in not-for-profit mental health/disability services as a support worker. I've been in my current job for five years. I really enjoy helping people but I've been finding my job a bit monotonous and boring. I also don't work on a team, only one-on-one with clients in their home or out in the community. I was thinking that I wanted to get a higher and more varied role. Like counsellor or case manager. I started thinking that I'd like to do a Masters of Social Work. In the last few weeks I got this E-mail from my previous university because I'm an alumni there. They were writing that the government is actually paying for some post graduate courses because this work is in high demand. There was a Postgraduate Diploma of Counselling which is free to do. Normally courses are not free. You can borrow money from the government. You get a loan in the sense that the government pays for your course. But once you work and start earning over $50, 000 per year, the government takes 10% from each pay until all the debt was paid off. This is an automatic deduction which you can't control and the money just gets taken from your pay. So I began thinking I could do this free counselling course. But I'm a little worried because the only work you can do with those subjects is counselling. It's not a social work degree, which allows you to apply for a large variety of roles, like case manager, etc. If I finish it but I find that doing actual counselling is not for me, I might be back to square one. It's a lot of effort for me to study and do the assignments due to my concentration issues. I mean, I can do it but it's not a piece of cake. I want to try counselling but I'm also wondering if I have the right personality for it. I think I'm a very caring person and have done well in my support worker jobs. But it's not counselling in the sense that I have to mostly just listen to people. I'm actually very talkative and bubbly and in my own personal conversations with friends and family I talk a lot. I was worried that I might struggle to just be mostly silent in counselling work and only listen to others. On the other hand, the course is free and that is a big advantage. I already have a huge education debt with the government because I failed many subjects in my university degree, but I still have to pay for them because I didn't withdraw from the unit. I also put my whole Diploma of Disability on the loan, which was maybe about $6000. The university degree is probably about $20, 000+. It seems good to do something for free but of course it requires time. And I am still working at my job too, but it's an online course. Any thoughts or suggestions? How am I doing on here? Do you think I have any potential to be a counsellor?