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Showing results for tags 'avoidant'.
I am in a 9 month relationship with a man who is aware that he has an avoidant attachment style. Despite his being very uncomfortable with emotions, he is able to say he loves me and shows me his love in other non-verbal ways. We get along wonderfully and everyone who knows us comments on how well matched we are, but they aren't aware of his fear of longer-term commitment. I'm not worried about him ever cheating on me, just that he's so afraid of progressing the relationship to a more serious level that he will back out, sabotage it, withdraw from it and move on to something new that takes the pressure off. He says he is aware of his attachment style and is trying his best to change it, but at the age of 39 he is still not ready to settle down, move in together, or think about the prospect of marriage or children. He says he does ultimately want those things, but he doesn't know when he will be ready. I'm 33 so I don't have a huge amount of time to wait around to have children - I don't know if I'm being foolish sticking with him and taking the risk that he might never be ready? Should I just be more patient with him and enjoy living in the moment? I love him so much it's too hard to walk away but at the same time I don't want to sacrifice my chances of having children before it's too late and I'm then faced with fertility issues.