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smackie9

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Everything posted by smackie9

  1. Don't reply. The silence will send a strong and clear message. Delete/block so she can't contact you again...let's make this final so you can move on quicker.
  2. What a passive/aggressive d-bag. He's being a sore loser, your gut instinct is right, you are not compatible. next time when a man starts talking to you like that....hit the delete button.
  3. Being on a dating site, men assume you want to "date". They are on there to find women, not friends. Maybe join a club or a group where you can socially interact with people where there is no expectation of sex or a relationship.
  4. smackie9

    Incels

    Anyone with any kind of condition or is socially awkward will get picked on...it's part of life. I know I was. BUT instead of being bitter and upset about it, I embraced change and the opportunity to help those who don't understand, understand. That's why a lot of us are on here. Lend some support and advice to those who struggle. On the positive side, I believe this incident will help give change, and promote open dialog for those who do have challenges. Things will always have a rough start, but will eventually smooth out and bring a brighter future.
  5. Do you really think you are ready for a serious relationship? I agree you should think baby steps and develop some friendships to start.
  6. smackie9

    Incels

    That is what his classmates had stated that he never acted out violently, and were confused by his actions. LET ME MAKE IT CLEAR I never meant being aspie was the cause or it promotes violence ( I know people who have the condition and well aware what Asperger is). I stated it as, with his condition (I believe there is more to his condition), the frustrations he has had, and the influence of this Incel group, made him more vulnerable than most. I believe this group takes advantage of men in his position because they are very vulnerable...and him having a mental condition, with his social anxiety, etc made it easy to fall into that perception that women are the cause of his issues. I think everyone is being a little PC. It's just a discussion to bring up his background. No one is blaming people who have the condition, or to be on alert for others who have it. I haven't seen anything in the media even stating that having the condition is prone to acts of violence...in fact quite the opposite has been stated. What most people are feeling is that they are so baffled he would do such a thing, and how frightening it is that this INCEL group has that much influence over someone who wouldn't hurt a fly, never exhibited violence or had any idea how drive.
  7. What happened? You were more into it than she was. Sometimes the infatuation wears off fast...I believe she was infatuated while you were fallin in love...like two north sides of magnets that don't connect.
  8. smackie9

    Incels

    This guy has Aspergers, and communicated with people meowing like a cat, hissing, pretend to lick his paws, etc. He would cower, hide, scurry away when in contact with a girl, never to make eye contact. This is how his fellow high school students remember him by. He was a weirdo. I'm sure he was picked on, etc. He was influenced by these Incel forums that he was lonely and sad because of women and their unfair attitude towards him and guys like him. Not even accounting the fact he has a mental disorder, he decided to run over people. Yes there was a male or two, not sure of the count, but his intention was to kill as many women as he could..
  9. She's not amazing or even has a bright future because she isn't mature enough to cut the apron strings of her mother. She is codependent, manipulated emotionally, brainwashed, whatever you want to call it. She ain't adult enough to simply stand on her own two feet. Obviously you can't convince her any different...what make you think we can? We can sit here all day and say she can't fill the void for her mother, she needs to be on her own, blah blah. The key thing here is that, she is making the choice to obey her mother. You can't tel her any different. This is something she will have to figure out on her own. If you don't like it...too bad so sad. You can't rescue her. You have two choices here. Accept her choice to do whatever to make her mom happy and support her, or take a walk, take a break, and seek her out 2 years from now and see where she's at if you haven't moved on already.
  10. I suggest you seek out a professional therapist to help you work through your anxiety. It's possible you may need medication, or exposure therapy. In any case, there is no magic antidote to your issues on here. With therapy you can at least retrain your brain to control those emotions that block you from social success with men. I understand what anxiety does and I know when it's so bad it affects your life, you can't cure it on your own. You mind goes a mile a second, messing you up, and can even feel physical pain. It's not a bad thing to get professional help.
  11. If it's anything but a YES, then it's a no.
  12. Maybe she doesn't want to go to the prom with you. That would explain her being distant.
  13. I think he is lonely and the fact he hasn't had any success meeting someone new/or had a relationship. He's burned you a couple of times...don't let him back in. I agree, just give him closure so he can finally stop contacting you.
  14. Your BF is petty and immature. I would not want to have a future with someone who behaves in such a manner.
  15. Because the incident is on the world stage. Not only that, expect more changes as police go through training to improve their handling of such situations. It looks like they are making steps to prevent to use of unnecessary force.
  16. There is a first time for everything right? What you are feeling is perfectly normal. This what it's like when you fall in love...anxiety of losing the person because they make you feel so wonderful. Life wouldn't be life if we didn't take risks right? Sit back, communicate, enjoy!
  17. The difference between Canada and the US...20 cops didn't gun him down in a barrage of gun fire. I'm sure it took a lot of control not to. Hats off to the officers who did their job in such a horrific situation, they are true heroes. Those poor families that have to deal with the loss... I am lost for words.
  18. I'm an aggressive woman, and had np getting men's attention without "looking desperate". When I see someone I'm attracted to, I get in their space and don't interact right away. I make sure they "notice me", make eye contact, and smile. This lets them know I acknowledge them and I'm interested. Then I pour on the flirt and tease, get them all flustered. I have them hoping out of their chairs. It's called confidence by not being brash/trashy. With wit and upbeat attitude, you will get them. Believe it or not, guys do like a woman that is forward....they find it refreshing.
  19. it's only been 2 months....still not enough time to shed all those emotions and attachments. She's only moving out of state, not off the face of the planet. If need be, you can always see her again down the road when she comes back into town. Give yourself another month and see where you are at. If it's still really bothering you, then ask her if she wants to meet one last time to have that closure.
  20. Some people, like myself, Don't bother with a serious relationship until about a year and a half of being single/dating around. She might want to get her past relationship out of her system first. All those memories and emotions take time to dissipate. That would be the reason why you are not having any success...you are still hung up on her, and none of those women don't have a chance.
  21. If he was honest about getting back with you, he wouldn't act like a total jerk, intentionally trying to hurt or upset you. IMO he doesn't deserve to be with you. Once you get that perspective, you will be able to move on without any doubt.
  22. Ask her for yourself. Me, I think she knows you want to get back with her because you haven't moved on yet (no GF) and still want to meet up with her. Has she forgiven you? probably not. Maybe that's why she doesn't want to try again. She doesn't trust you. BTW her being hesitant is a NO for now.
  23. I'm going by what she has told you. You can't force/make someone to take you back or love you again. She's made it clear to back off, she's not ready yet, you just won't accept that. Now the best thing you can do is to keep in contact and let her make that decision. I believe if you push, she will push back. She's still very hurt, she's heard your apologies....now the ball is in her court. I agree you must heal and move on. I have been on both sides of the fence so I speak from experience....that's how I know. I've had two relationships that had messed up my life. You know when you are done with it. Maybe seek out some anger management/therapy to figure out why you had such abusive behavior.
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