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turnerik

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  1. We have been married less than a year now, but we are having some problems in the bedroom. I, the husband, am having a hard time wanting sex. It seems like we are never in the mood at the same time. Last night I came on to her and she rejected me. Why am I supposed to just take that rejection for nothing, but when I am not interested in sex, it’s the end of her world. We had sex earlier today mind you. We just got back from a hike, and I was giving the dogs a bath. I finished and started cleaning up the bathroom. She comes in naked and I was more worried about cleaning up, then having sex. I make a joke and she walks away crying. I immediately feel like crap. I feel like I can’t satisfy my wife. I feel like less of a man. She goes “I’m sorry, it’s my fault, can we move on now?” I don’t feel like it’s her fault, I don’t feel like it’s my fault either, although I do feel like less of a man. She said she has to leave. She walked out the door and is gone. I don’t think she is going out to sleep with anyone, but I don’t know how to move forward. Do I just have sex with her even if I am not mentally into it? Do I do that every time? I’m so lost.
  2. My wife and I got married a little over two weeks ago. We lived together before hand, so our honeymoon isn’t a true honeymoon. We are in the middle of our trip and I’m not sure what to do. She had a complete mental breakdown last night. We were walking around Honolulu and we were looking for a place to drink. I picked a bar and she didn’t want to go. She saw this other bar and wanted to go. It was a $20 cover charge, and I didn’t want to pay that as we are way over our budget already. We didn’t go, but she walked away and told me she would go if she wasn’t with me. I was a little hurt and she started walking away. We are both uneasy with the city as we are not big city people. I finally found her sitting by a river. She told me she hates her self. I asked why we can’t compromise to find a place we both want. She said because she is defective, and an awful person. We finally settle down a little bit and go back to our hotel room. I’m not sure how to exactly explain it, but she just went nuts. She was sitting in the floor hitting herself with a pillow screaming she hates herself. She would just lay on the floor. She decided this morning that I would “control” the rest of the vacation because she is a mess up, and is ruining our time in Hawaii. I don’t feel like that at all, I want her to be happy, I want us to decide to do things together. I have no idea what to do, we have 5 days left, but I don’t want to honeymoon with a sad puppy that just follows me around.
  3. I got a text early in the week about a co-worker whose birthday is coming up. The person asked that we all bring something for a salad bar on Monday. I absolutely cannot stand the birthday girl. She has tried to get me fired, she is super bossy, and tells me I am fat. It has gotten to the point where I just won’t talk to her. I leave the room when she comes in. Everyone else complains about how much of a she is, and has been since she started. Is it the right thing to participate and bring something for her birthday even though I hate salads and her lol?
  4. Update: I sent a text to my best man and the other friend planning it, basically saying do not bother. I don’t want any stress for travel and time off. Both guys were understanding. My fiancée was a little perturbed but in the end said it is my choice. She just doesn’t understand it. I told my best man that we should all go out fishing the morning of the rehearsal dinner since we will all be together then!
  5. She isn’t pressuring me to get strippers. She knows I don’t want any, but said she won’t get upset if I have one. I think she did it to calm my fear (that I really don’t have) that I would be worried about how she would feel if there was a stripper.
  6. I’m getting married in a few months. I don’t want a bachelor party. My fiancée wants me to have one. I have no interest in one. First I don’t want strippers. My fiancée says she is cool with it. I’m not. She said she has told my best man that I don’t want them, but she said there is a possibility they could get one anyways. She knows I’m the person who would just leave if one shows up, but told me not to leave. My best man and most of my friends live out of state. I don’t want to travel back home for a bachelor party. I don’t want to drag her brother out there with me either. He wants to go. I honestly would rather save the money. My fiancée has a birthday coming up and I want to take her out of state (a different state) for a concert. It would cost some money that we are trying to save up for our wedding and honeymoon. I really don’t know how to say to my best man I don’t want one, or tell my fiancée. I have already told her that I don’t want one at all, but She basically told me I need to have one. I think they are buying the plane tickets soon, but I don’t want to go. I don’t want to disappoint my friends and fiancée but I just don’t want to. It’s my choice right?
  7. I asked her if she was done with him and she said yes. She also texted me this I love you so much. I want us. I want you. I just also need to be honest with my expectations. I expect that I can make my own choices. I expect that you trust me. I told her I feel like I’m in the purgatory of not really knowing if she is gonna continue talking to him or not. She said she is done, but might contact him when she’s drunk.
  8. So she tells me that she can see herself getting drunk and texting or calling him. I told her there are steps she can take to make sure that never happens. I ask her point blank is she doing Anything suspicious. She tells me that it was just a really close friendship. That my standards for what a friend is doesnÂ’t matter. She asks me what happens if she feels like she thinks she can be friends with him again. I tell her I refuse to play this hypothetical game. Part of me feels like she lost a good friend in her mind so sheÂ’s super sad. The other part says who the hell cries over someone who just stopped talking to you
  9. My fiancé has started telling me how she misses this guy she used to be really good friends with. She has spent nights crying about him, and how she misses the friendship. She told me she doesn’t think there can be a friendship between them with me in the picture. She said they were really close before and would hang out constantly. While she was married before this same guy ended up texting her telling her all the sexual stuff he would like to do to her. She said she didn’t participate but also didn’t ask him to stop. After we got together, he stopped contacting her and she did the same towards him. Today she told me she wanted to call him to end things with him on a better note. She talked to him for a while and then she told him there really couldn’t be a friendship as there’s no room for him and I In her life. I’ve never met the guy but I think he’s an awful person by what she says he has said to her, and how he didn’t even say anything or tried talking to her when he randomly stopped contact. After she got off the phone with him she started crying about how easy it was to talk to him and how she really misses him and misses their friendship. I honestly just sat there because I don’t know what to do. I don’t feel like there is room for both of us in her life. I want to comfort her but at the same time I can’t say it’s ok to keep talking to him because it’s not.
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