RUN GIRLFRIEND!!
I'm 40 years old and have been dating the same guy you're dating! Not really, but they sound exactly the same!! We've been together for nearly a year and I can tell you, it only gets worse! You may want to look at his background (Dad not in his life, parents divorced early, abusive parent, etc.) In my case, his parents divorced when he was 6 and he's never seen or heard from his Father since. It destroyed his self-esteem. I've done a lot of reading on this and we've been to counseling too. I know how difficult it is to handle because you love his GOOD qualities! Like you, my life is very established, I work with 60+ men, have male friends, I'm a Human Resources Manager so I HAVE to deal with my male co-workers on a daily basis. Not to sound "big headed" but, I've always been told that I'm attractive. No matter how much I try to boost my boyfriends self-esteem, nothing works. He has got to do this himself! He needs to find the one thing that he's really good at, and dive right in.
The therapist said my boyfriend (age 39) will need weekly sessions for about 2 years to overcome his low self-esteem problem. It's sad because like your guy, mine can be extremely thoughtful, loving, affectionate, etc.
I'm not sure what to do myself because I'm in love with his good qualities. However, the bad ones are over-shadowing the good right now. Word of caution: If your guy is overly "CHARMING", EVERYONE likes him, thinks he's just the greatest guy ever..........RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN! That's another type of guy with low self-esteem but they're dangerous (become physically abusive).
I got on this site today because I'm at my witts end! I can't even make an appointment to see a doctor without him accusing me of cheating on him.
Best of luck to you!
