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klin

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About klin

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    Bronze Member
  • Birthday 12/16/1992

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  1. Hey there...the last time we spoke you said that you hoped we'd talk soon and you requested that we keep talking about our feelings...I said yes reluctantly if only to just protect myself from repeated hurt, and I've ached so deeply to hear from you. I understand that you may be feeling the same way about respecting distance/space/time for me, or perhaps you are hoping I will initiate because I was the one who requested space...or perhaps you have had the time you've needed to feel more confident in your part of this decision...which really makes it your decision altogether, I guess. I'm not s
  2. Hey there, mister. I'm thinking about you this morning. Well, to be honest, I have mostly been thinking about you since I woke up at 6:30...and it's a Saturday morning, so I knew it was because my body felt like it was missing something...a sad reality of what seems to happen when relationships end for me. I hope that you're having a good day today - maybe you're even still sleeping? Or enjoying a little snuggy time in bed? I hope you didn't wake up too early too. I also hope you found some plans to replace the ones that we had for today - so you can get your mind off things and have time to r
  3. I haven't posted here in a while, but I just wanted to say "UGGGHGHHHHHGHHHH." because it's not that we were never in love or that you never seriously wanted to marry me or that our relationship was never good. (I realized that this is what I've been telling myself recently.) It's that you gave up and you ran away. I don't have any negative feelings for you except for that. For running away from me. I wasn't a bad girlfriend, and you had nothing bad to say about our relationship except "it just wasn't working out." I don't want this to happen to you, but I do want to get very upset to you for
  4. I don't post in this thread often, but today has had a lot of odd little things come up and bother me. I found out that two of your (previously our...sigh) friends got engaged a couple of weeks ago because your brother replied on Twitter. I unfollowed him and your sister realizing that it doesn't hurt to see their updates, but I gotta cut my ties. I hate that I feel so worthless to you. You were the biggest treasure to me, and you just dropped me. You just quit. You left and you didn't look back and you said sorry and that it was okay if I was mad at you. I don't even know if I'm angry, but I
  5. I'm disappointed that reminders of you give me anxiety, that unexpectedly seeing photos of you with mutual friends makes me so uncomfortable that I have to close the album after seeing one photo, that I was hurt so deeply by your actions, that I was forced to let go and move on. It's too bad things worked out like this. I know I said I can't and won't be your friend, but I wish my subconscious wasn't so frightened by you - you didn't do anything intentional to hurt me, you just didn't see us getting married and didn't want to talk about it. You broke my heart and it hasn't forgotten, no ma
  6. I am getting back into the swing of school and today was pretty good. I thought about you a few times but didn't miss you until somebody said something tonight about hating when people whisper in her ear because she doesn't like the heat. It reminded me of kissing you. Gosh, I miss that. I want to say sorry for everything. I want things to be okay. I know they can't. I miss you.
  7. We spoke today and things were good. It's hard, though. I do well when things are good because I feel like we're on good terms and your feelings toward me are positive, I do very poorly when we are in semi-contact, and I do well when we don't talk at all because I know I'm making progress. I miss you a TON. It was hard seeing all of our friends kiss at midnight and know that you were at a party with other friends you told me had become "convenient" for you to get closer with...ha. I think it would have been hard for you to be there too, and I am glad you didn't end up going. I miss you, but yo
  8. Hmmm. Closure isn't just a word to me. I think it varies from person to person, though. I got mine through a few things. My ex and I never really had a sit down and talk through stuff...we talked for a long time when we broke up and he gave me a lot of bs (things aren't as "fun" anymore...yep...sure...glad to see you're planning dates as often as I am....). I asked a LOT of questions post-breakup and he answered few of them (he said a lot of "I don't know"s and "I'm sorry"s). Honestly, I don't think HE knows why he did it, but he felt that he had to and had so much confidence in his decision.
  9. I meant too much pressure as in the days are the most important thing...I know that I don't want to go back to day 1, and some days I can go a good portion of my day without thinking "it's been __ days since we've talked! why! Why!" I'd rather just not know because it's a comfort. I found that last time I did NC I counted and I always knew and now I don't want to know because I'm not waiting for a specific day...I just don't want to talk to him anymore because he has nothing positive or comforting to say to me.
  10. It's been almost a week I think. I'm not really counting...I feel like it puts too much pressure on and i don't plan on reaching any specific date...contacting him has just made me feel like crap. It's a lot easier to pretend that he doesn't exist. I've had a really really good past couple of days. Yesterday was the first day where I felt really right to be where I am in life - doing things that I really want to do - everything has been building up to so much good - the absolute first time that I've felt this in the past 3 months! And I didn't cry at all yesterday...first time in a few weeks!
  11. I'm sorry for holding on so tightly. I'm sorry that we can't be friends. I miss you a lot, and I miss being close to you ~ emotionally and physically. I hope you're doing okay. I'm glad you haven't been wishy washy...my heart's gotta heal. I really hope you figure out what you're looking for. Sincerely, I do.
  12. I am so SO broken by the fact that you don't want me anymore. It just kills all the fibres of my being. I don't like being with myself most of the time because I liked who you brought out in me. I'm so sad it wasn't that way for you too. I miss you, babes. I wanted to call you tonight and let you know how much I cherished you and our relationship...alas, it's 3 am and it's a bad idea regardless. I just got home from that party and I'm really glad you decided not to go. Honestly, I hope it's more because you thought it would be too hard than that you worried it would be awkward. That sucks for
  13. I can feel myself falling out of love with you a little bit. It's a little scary, but it's good. I don't want to pine so much for somebody who doesn't want me in their life. I tried so hard to be my best for you, and you told me you were concerned about settling. I want you to be happy, but saying something like that makes it seem like you're better than me. I don't need to be a doormat. I am worth so much more than the box you put me in and left.
  14. I had another dream about you last night. I think the last time I had one was about a month ago. It seemed really real. I woke up so disappointed. I know I need to accept that it's over, but I just can't. I still want you so badly.
  15. I miss you. I miss being in love. Every day I remember a different special memory that I really treasured. I'm sorry for going so crazy after the breakup. I'm trying to convince myself that there's somebody better out there for me, and that this is it for us forever, but I can't help that I still want you. I love you. I'm sorry that accepting it isn't as easy as it sounds.
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