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About TheOutsider1

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    Gold Member
  • Birthday 08/13/1988
  1. I'm in a very negative state of mind right now. Having major anxiety, and depression over this. I feel I wasted my life away. I haven't done anything in these two years. Just apply for jobs, go to interviews, and a lot of waiting and hoping someone would call. I've wasted my life away.
  2. That does not mean I think I am better than people who work at low wage jobs. I empathize with them. It's not easy, and they are underpaid for how hard they work. I've been there. Still, I appreciate all of your replies. Everyone gave me good advice, and I am grateful for it. I think I will look at other jobs, as well as volunteering. I have a lot of thinking to do now.
  3. I don't think I am better than people who work fast food jobs. I'm not sure why you would say something like that. I worked very hard for my education because I wanted a better life for myself. Working low wage jobs was hard to make a living that way.
  4. I am very worried about these past two years of no work for that reason as well. unfortunately I can't go back now, so this looks really bad, the long unemployment gap. I feel like I am screwed. I feel like I'll never find a job due to all of this. I could work fast food like you said, but I worked so hard to get a degree so that I wouldn't go back to such jobs.
  5. Unfortunately, the person who supervised my supervisor was even worse. I got to see some crazy things at that internship.
  6. This is exactly what I have been doing, I'm vague about the situation, letting them know we were just not a match, because I was not receiving the experience that I was seeking, but that I still learned important skills, and that my second internship went well, and I let them know why it went well. If they contact my first internship, it's the supervisor's word against mine. She really hated me. If she said awful things to my face, what would she not say to the employers who might contact her. I feel like I have no control over this situation. It's been two years.
  7. Social Work. There is absolutely no truth in the bad mouthing. I worked hard at the internship, obeyed all orders, even did extra work, while the supervisor gave a lighter load to the other interns. She would yell at me when no one was around, calling me lazy, telling me that I was good for nothing, and that she didn't see me making it in the field, and that I should just quit. I didn't talk back because I was scared to receive a failing grade. I would allow her to just yell at me, while I sat there trying not to cry, but I was going home crying almost daily. I couldn't take it anymore, so I t
  8. I have been unemployed for two years now, after I graduated with my Bachelors degree. I did two internships because I had to leave my first one, due to being verbally/emotionally abused by my supervisor. I am now convinced that my first supervisor is the reason why no one will hire me. If job interviewers are calling my first internship, she would for sure bad mouth me to them, as she did to the staff at my school when we tried to solve the issues. I let my school know about the abuse that was going on, and even they were shocked. Of course the supervisor denied everything. I've considered lea
  9. I'm starting to see something.. how she is being with me, is how one of her friends is with her. She has told me before that one of her friends leaves her messages on read, and then tells her that she was too busy to reply, etc. She has told me that she finds this behavior annoying, yet she's doing it to me. That's so weird!
  10. I'm focusing on her trying to make me feel bad for something I'm not. It's not just her calling me a stranger, she will go on about how she has not heard from me in a month, and she sounds shocked and hurt, it's the way she says it when we talk on the phone about it. We talk about many different things: family, how we are doing, jobs, love life. What do you mean by do I like her as more than a friend?
  11. That's what I have always done. If she leaves me on read, I don't send yet another message. Maybe she wants me to beg her? I say this because it feels as if she expects me to continuously reach out, despite her leaving me on read. I don't message her again and say "hey did you get my message?" She eventually reaches out to me, and tries to make me feel bad for not reaching out. That's when I tell her, "I sent you a message, did you not receive it?" She tells me she read it, and that she must have been busy, and forgot to reply... find the logic in that. I'm trying to. It feels like head games
  12. We have on phone conversations, too, it's not all messages, but I understand what you are saying about human contact. My problem is with her calling me a stranger. When I know I have not been one. Especially because I reply to her messages, I don't leave her on read like she does to me. She's cold to my thoughtful holiday wishes, when she wasn't this way before. Yet she wants to call me a stranger?
  13. We talk on the phone sometimes, and hangout in person once in a while. We don't do the in person hangout often. She doesn't like going out much, so it's not something she is up for often, and I'm the same way. That's not the issue. She has made it clear that she read my messages, and like I said, she didn't act this way before, by leaving me on read, then calling me a stranger, as well as cold responses from her, to my thoughtful holiday wishes. She used to wish me happy holidays before. I feel that if anything, she's the one behaving like the stranger.
  14. She tells me that she reads my messages, because I mention it when she asks me why she has not heard from me. She says that she was just busy. I totally get what you are saying about moving through the stages of life, that's not my issue. My issue is that she tries to tell me that I'm a stranger because she doesn't hear from me. Like I said, she hears from me plenty.
  15. She sends me lengthy messages as well, but I actually reply to them. We talk on the phone sometimes, and see each other in person once in a while. She says she doesn't use social media, aside from text messages, so I don't have her on other social media.
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