Gio Salazar

Hello. Thanks for the insight, Moggs. I guess I sorta got alarmed after reading everything that happened to everyone in this thread... I'm just scared that one day she'll wake up and realizes she no longer wants to be with me, or worse, that she's killed herself. She wasn't like this before. She's had her "fits" over the past 2 years but she was never this ill-tempered and turbulent. This change in her attitude is really alarming. Like what happened to you with your ex, I could sense my girl breaking away from me now. She no longer tells me how she's feeling or what's going through her head like she used to. A month after her cousin passed away, she was still very open to me... talking about her cousin, her thoughts, obsessing on the "what ifs", and I would patiently listen to her go over her stories repeatedly. It was understandable because she was still devastated and in shock from her cousin's sudden death. But now, she barely speaks. When she does talk, it's only to snap and lash out at me. Even a simple conversation would irritate her and she'll shut herself off in our room and sleep. Sometimes, I’m afraid to talk to her because I might say something wrong... or fall into her path for fear it would annoy her. We're living under the same roof but we might as well be living on a different planet with the distance she's created between us. The rare times that she does manage to tolerate my company, she would drift off into space and I've never felt so far away from her. It’s like she’s here but her mind is wandering off somewhere else. I wish I have enough strength to deal with this. My family is getting worried and they’re telling me to return her back to her family when I express how this is affecting me. I know they mean well but that is not an option I’m willing to consider. I love her so much and I can't for one second picture myself with someone else. We’ve broken up before and I saw what my life was without her… it was so empty. Our relationship was not perfect but out of all the women that I’ve been with, she’s the only one I saw myself building a life with and I won’t give her up just like that… but she’s making it extremely difficult for me to stand firm on that decision.

Hi there. The same thing is happening with me and my girlfriend of 2 years after her cousin [who was like a big sister to her] passed away 3 months ago. Except that, when she’s not withdrawing from the world and shutting me out, she’s either angry or irritated with me. It’s so difficult because we’re living together and I’m always at the receiving end of her wrath. I’m constantly walking on egg shells around her. I can’t believe how much she’s changed in just a few months. A week after her cousin died, she became very clingy and emotional [a complete turnaround of who she was] and she would get anxious when I’m not around, so I tried my best to be by her side as much as I could. This went on for about a month until suddenly; she became extremely moody.... which progressed to anger---directed some towards herself or family, but mostly at me! Although my needs aren't important right now, I wanted badly to pamper her... to take care of her but she wouldn’t let me. A part of me feels a bit frustrated that my best intentions... my sweetest gestures feel taken for granted. I want to provide at least some measure of comfort in the best ways I know how, and feel like i'm being shoved aside. I cared for her cousin a great deal.... and her death affected me even more than I anticipated. I suppose I had the mistaken impression that we could comfort one another... but it hurts that she doesn't seem to want any of it. I don't know what to do. Almost everything I say or do is annoying or just plain wrong.