Meow18

From your view, this is only going to be a one time thing and then you will be gone and forget about her. For her it's more than that. She is begging you to sleep with her because she wants that attention from you. She isn't thinking about the future when you will be thousands of miles away. She's thinking about now and winning you over now.

I agree that she would probably end up getting hurt by it. It sounds like she has been trying to push for more from you, like a friendship, and now maybe feels like sleeping with you is the only way to get to you? It's sad, but I know a whole lot of girls who think that the only way to get attention is through being sexual. In my opinion, nothing good could come from this. Whatever you choose to do is obviously your choice, but if you have any doubts at all, don't do it cause you really will regret it.

I'm assuming you are referring to me.. What I meant was, he leaves soon after school ends. I don't think he's ever left at 3:00 in his whole job life, but usually by 3:20, unless he has to meet with a student, or unless he has a reason to stay.. and if that's the case then it will be around 4:00. Just thought I would clear it up, even though it has nothing to do with the original post..

Wow.. obviously neither of them care about your feelings to do it right in front of you. I can't even believe he would have been so involved with what she was doing to not even realize that you were upset, or even on the floor. I would lose them both. If he can do something like this in front of you, then who knows what he might do when you aren't there. He basically cheated on you right in front of you. And your "friend". I don't think you even need to hear this, but why would she even do something like that? That is not a real friend. At least you know now that neither of them really care about you and you deserve better people in your life.

My boyfriend is a teacher. He LOVES his job. He leaves soon after school ends, unless he has to meet with a student. Why? Well why stay if there's no reason to? Besides, he likes to get home so that he can start on grading so that he can have a life outside of work later in the evening. My mom is an accountant and she also loves her job. She loves numbers and even does her whole families taxes for free. I know that these are only 2 cases out of millions, but not everyone hates their job just because sometimes they want to leave as soon as they can. , so be careful of what you assume. Full time jobs can be stressful, whether you love your job or not. Just because one wants to have a life outside of their job doesn't mean that they could care less about the work that they do or the people involved. In my opinion, if you hate your job, there's no point in staying in it, even if it pays a lot. Some people choose to stay of course because to them money is important. People need money to survive. That's only realistic. So, I think that it's important to at least make as much as you need. And sometimes, low paying jobs that you love are worth it for that reason. You can't go on cruises every other month, but at least you love what you do and don't mind waking up in the morning for it.

Same here. Anyways, if I was you, I wouldn't worry about it. Are you talking about having sex soon? If you are talking about sex, then maybe let her know. But it won't make any difference now if she's not going to be down there. If she doesn't want to be with you over it, then it's her loss and you would deserve someone who isn't so shallow about a person you love.

You don't want to move out without having a job. You have a lot saved up, but that money won't be saved forever, so it's important to have the stability of a job. In my opinion, what you are going through can be normal. I think your dad is honestly just looking out for you, even though he's not giving you the privacy you deserve at your age. I am in no way saying what he is doing is ok, but I don't think he's doing it to get on your nerves. Maybe he feels like he doesn't know about your personal life? Maybe he wants to know about your friends and your girlfriend? I think you and your dad need to talk and come to a compromise. Maybe include your mom so that it doesn't get nasty. But I really think you need to tell him that even though you are under his roof, you want to be treated with respect and have the privacy you deserve. And maybe what you can do is just talk to him honestly whenever he wants to talk. I know it's not that easy, but I really think that moving out would not be your best option at this point. I think you need to talk to your dad.

Can you call them today, like right now?

I would send an email, but maybe even call if you don't think email is the best way. Say something like "Thanks for agreeing to do these recommendations for me. I'm just sending a friendly reminder that they need to be turned in by "blank". Please let me know if there is an issue." You are not harassing them. This is important and they agreed to do it I'm assuming. They shouldn't have taken on the role if they wouldn't have time or didn't want to. It's up to you to make sure that they actually get done.

Congratulations!

There's nothing wrong with just being together, if that's what you both want. But to some people marriage is important. So, you just have to decide what is important to you and if it's not the same as your boyfriend, then it's not going to work out too well.

I can understand why you are annoyed. Maybe Nikki just never learned how to be a problem solver? Maybe she just doesn't know how to handle sudden changes/stress without over stressing? That's not exactly her fault. But there's nothing you can do about it unless you want to really hurt her feelings by telling her this. In my opinion, what she's going through now is a big deal. She had her heart broken. It will take much more than a week to get over this, especially with the way she handles things. You have 2 choices, either be a friend and support her through her times of need. In this case, do things with the girls, as others have mentioned. Listen to her talk about how much she misses him and remind her about why she's better without him. Afterall, isn't that what friends really are for? She needs time to heal and forget about this boy and with the help of you and her other friends, it will be faster. Or take a step back. That wouldn't make you a bad friend. But don't be one of those friends who pretends to listen to problems but then just complains about it behind the other's back. If you are tired of hearing about it, tell her to take her problems to someone else.

I agree with this. Long distance relationships are a lot harder because you can only go off of words. I mean, when you both have two separate lives so far away, it's not easy to always show your feelings through actions. And it's not easy taking hours daily out of your life to work on the relationship. The other thing is that you have only been together for 1-2 months, right? If it's that early, and you haven't even met in real life, you don't really know each other too well. It might be harder for him to do romantic things for you when he doesn't really know you yet. That doesn't make him braindead or stupid or even lazy. To some people it's common sense to reply to a valentine e-card. To others, it might not be. He just seems like the type who is still in the "getting to know you" stage and doesn't really know how to go about this kind of relationship. Maybe he feels that it's common sense for you to know he is thankful without saying it.. who knows. It sounds like you really want more than what you are getting from this relationship. And that's ok, but it's not ok to expect things from him and get mad or insecure everytime he doesn't meet your expectations. That's just who he is and maybe he's not right for you if he's not meeting your expectations any way.

I hate to point this out, but this is exactly the same problem you have asked about before. You won't get different advice. Your girlfriend goes between wanting to be with you and wanting a break. She's confused and doesn't know what she wants. You need to give her space. if you ever want her to get it straight. I know it's hard to understand when one day she can act like she wants nothing more than to be in a relationship with you. It's confusing. And it's not fair for her to be dragging you through this. Give yourself a break and give her space and time to decide what she really wants.

I think if you take this as a lesson learned, it will really help the relationship. Also, if you can't trust him, there's no real relationship. That's why long distance is so hard.. because you just have to trust what they are saying and telling you. He probably wouldn't still be with you if he didn't want to. Nobody wastes their time in a relationship with someone else if they really odn't want to be. Just trust that he would let you know if he didn't think things would work out.

I think that you definitely have some issues that need to be worked through. And that's normal when you have been basically raped, especially when it's by someone who is supposed to care about you. I would really suggest professional counseling. In my opinion, you are still being effected by something that happened years ago and even though you might not feel as bad about it, it still continues to effect you. It's great that your boyfriend is so understanding of your past. He must be a wonderful person. But really, you are still having issues with feeling used and hurt when it comes to sex. Getting some help with that will really help.

I believe so. It can be hard sometimes though if and/or when one starts to have feelings for the other. But in the cases where it's really just a friendship with no feelings, I think that two people of the opposite gender can be great friends.

[quote=desert_rose26;1463707 btw meow18, love your pic. Thanks I think that it's good that you got your feelings out. It did hurt you and I can understand why it did. Just remember that issues need to be talked about. If you feel like something is not right, talk to him. You need to. And if you feel like you deserve better than what he has to offer you, then you do.

Next time you see him online, send him a message. Don't wait for him to do it. It's as if you are testing him. Why not just ask him if he got it? Long distance relationships won't work if you can't be honest and talk to each other. Instead of jumping to conclusions, give him a chance to explain himself.

I don't think your relationship is doomed just because she fantasizes about threesomes. It would be one thing if it's all she talked about and she was really pushing for it to happen. But I don't think she will cheat on you just because it's a fantasy. She obviously loves you since she said it doesn't matter if it never happens. Just think about how you really feel about it and be honest with her.

I would advise not to do it as well. She would completely understand. Afterall, she said she couldn't stand to see you with another girl, so she better understand. Could you stand to see her having sex with another guy right in front of you? In my opinion, it will only bring un-needed insecurities into your relationship. It could do more harm than anything.

I was wondering the same thing. Is the ring really that important? If you wait til he can afford an engagement ring, then you will waiting forever, especially with the way he saves money.

Maybe he has something planned. Don't assume that he doesn't, and don't assume that just because he hasn't replied means the worst. The best thing is to not have your expectations too high otherwise you will only be let down. Don't be too hard on him just yet. The day isn't over..

He might not have gotten it yet. I would give it a few more hours at least before you start assuming the worst..

That's a really interesting subject. Personally, I think it would be wonderful for those women who really wanted children but couldn't have them. My cousin had to have her ovaries removed when she was 9 years old due to cancer. Now she's 36 and would have loved to have her own children, but she recently adopted and loves the child as if it were her own and wouldn't trade her daughter for anything now. So, if a woman really wanted to have her own children, and adopting wouldn't be enough, then I would say it would be great for them.