gemsie
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I really don't know!!! I agree that taking things slow is probably the best option. I just wanted to say I hope things go well for you tomorrow and your husband is very lucky as I don't think many people would be so understanding. Hopefully your husband will come through this shortly and you can get things back to normal
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I think if you do want to get back together then yeah why not? However I do think you need to sort out all these problems first as to stay in contact with each other and pretend everything is fine will just result in more arguments. Just so you can understand a little of what I think she was feeling when she said she wanted space...... I broke a relationship between me and my first love in similar circumstances. It wasn't because I'd been with anyone else or wanted anyone else, it was just simply I had spent three years living in each others pocket, I had lost friends and when I did have some time alone (like when your girlfriend went to Cuba) I found myself thinking is this it? Is this me for the rest of my life? I know this is a very hard situation but it does all come good in the end and if you are meant to be together you will sort it all out. You just have to think about whether you can forgive her for going with someone else and also if she can forgive you? I hope things turn out well for you and you are happy, and I hope what I'vewrote has helped a little.
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About 4 years ago I split up with my first love, nothing bad had happened, we just grew apart as we were very young when we got together. It was hard leaving as his family were fantastic and I did really love him, we were just arguing alot and made the big mistake of loosing touch with our friends. We have both since moved on and I can see how bad we were for each other as we now both have better social lives than we did when we were together. I don't know if this is important but I don't really get on with my current partners family. I did maintain a lttle bit of friendly contact with my ex's family. Unfortunately my ex's mam died a few month ago, which I was very upset about and obviously he is going through a bad time. Since this happened he told me he still loves me. I have had what can only be described as a "stir of emotions" since he said this. I don't know what these feelings are or what it means and I am finding things quite upsetting. I am really in love with my partner and we have just getting engaged and I don't want to lose him. It's becoming difficult when we're out as when my ex is out with his new partner he refuses to speak to me which I find really difficult as we were really close and I would miss him as a friend if he said he didn't want to speak to me again. Has anybody got any advice please?
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the same thing happened to me last year!I went through all the motions of him promising there was no one else, then finding out he met sum1 else when he was with me, then also meeting sum1 else who also had a gf. I think the best thing you can do, which is what i found was best for me anyways, is to avoid men altogether. Go out with the girls and hav fun, do things that u neva wud have done when you were with your boyfriend. I did all this, had lots of fun! I dated a few people but nothing serious, then one night i went out and met sum1 and ive been with him ever since and im very happy. I believe its easier to move on when your not lookin for sum1 else. As for bad things happenin 2 u, it happens to every1. No matter how nice they are. My nana used to always have a saying when i was younger, it mite sound silly but its true, what goes around comes around. One day your ex will get his! I know everything ive said isnt exactly advice but more about my own experiences, but i hope ive helped. I hope you feel better soon x x
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!!Hi guys, I just dropped my boyfriend off at the airport,hes going away on a lads holiday, im gonna miss him loads, any ideas on wot i can do to stop myself thinking about him all the time? Another thing he's also goin with 3 of his best mates (female) one of them he had thing for, although i trust him and know he wont hurt me, theres still sumthin at the back of my mind! Is this normal? because its driving me mad!!!
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Just found out he has a new gf...Please help
gemsie replied to jd21's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
Hi Jd, I understand exactly what your going through. I am in the exact same situation. My ex split up with me in october, similar reasons, he felt he was too young. A few eeks later I found he had someone else, and as far as I know he's still with her. It hurts like hell I know! I promise you though it really does get better. Ive found it easier to move on by not having any contact with him at all, which is quite hard because we go to uni together, but it was the best way for me. After a while, you'll begin wonder what you didn't love about being single. You have no one else to think about, and can take time to yourself as you please. At the minute I don't even think I have time for a boyfriend. I admit I do still miss him, but when I really think hard, I miss having someone there, and not the person he turned out to be. I'm sorry your feeling bad, Hope you feel better soon x -
I don't know if anyone remembers when I first started posting on here about 2 months ago when i first split up with my bf? Anyways i'm doin fine now, thanks to everyone who gave advice on here! New situation now, I went out clubbing last weekend, and I kissed a guy, first person since i split up with my ex. Then I found out he had a girlfriend, he had already taken my number. Through the week he rang me a few times saying he really liked me and wanted to see me. Stupidly I agreed to go out with him today. I know I shouldn't have, because I've ended up really liking him. I told him I didn't want to see him again because it's unfair on his girlfriend, he said it was ok because they were going through a bad patch at the minute anyways - but isnt that unfair on me? Now i'm sitting here constantly thinking about him and wondering why I get mixed up with guys who aren't going to treat me right. He obviously has no intention of splitting up with her. Am I right not to see him again?
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I think you should be brave and come right out and tell her how you feel, the longer you think about it the longer its going to drive you mad. Just go for it, whats the worst that could happen? She could say she only likes you as a friend, but at least then you know where you stand! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you x
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Dealing with the anxiety after the relationship ends
gemsie replied to Boromir's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
its awful isnt it, i am going through exactly the same thing. I dont even know what to tell you, the nly thing that can make u feel better is time. One thing my mam said to me tho, is the comfort feeling you r looking for is a habit, and habits are always grownout of. I know it doesnt help but its something to think about. Im gutted abut my ex bein with sum 1 else, but im sure we will be ok????? hope your feeling better soon x -
I dont know if most of you will have already read about my break up? but anyways my ex has a new gf who he got with about a week after we split up. spoke to hm on thursday for the first time in a month, ive been too hurt to speak to him before that, but for sum reason i really wanted to talk to him. I ended up having to leave after a few minutes cos it didnt feel right. After thinking about it for a few hours, i decided to email him, basically to say goodbye. I dont want to be his friend, its too hard, i manage ok when i dont c him! It was kind of closure. I sobbed when i wrote it and for hours afterwards and all the next day, i wasnt crying because i was upset. I kind of felt relieved cos i felt like it was all over. Te next day when i logged on he had replied, sayinghe understood, but wud like us to be civil bcos he hates how we pretend we dont know each other. Now I dont feel like ivehad the closure, hes never replied to any of my emails after we split up, so this has kind of thrown me. wot do i do? please help
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thanx for your advice boundaries. This weekend has been a bit of a turning point for me! I had a good cry and let everything off my chest. I cried not just for my ex but for everything thats happened to me in the past couple of years that i've kept bottled up. Ive never been able to grieve properly (my nana and granda died within a few months of each other) because ive always had someone else to think about, but now i only have myself! I quit my job, which i have been unhappy in for a long time, and I had the girls round last night and we had a really good time! Before i used to find myself really looking forward to a tuesday as that is the day that i would see him at uni, but thinking about it im dreading it instead. I dont know if thats a good thing? I feel as though it is. I feel things r on the up for me now. Things are still hard, but i know its going to get better. Thanks again x
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This is a really difficult situation. Ive been going through a similar one. Me and my ex are in the same classes at uni, I thought everyone would be adult, but some people have been childish and chose sides. Two people have even stopped speaking to me altogether, even though it wasn't me who ended thngs. It's at difficult times like these when you find out who your real friends are, one thing you must never do though is give up a friend. Although if you do want to be friends with this guy you can't talk about your ex. Talk with him about how your feeling, thats what friends are for, but don't ask about your ex or what shes been up to as this will make your friend feel uncomfortable and thats not fair. I hope ive been able to help and hope you sort things out soon x
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a temporary separation that i don't really want
gemsie replied to painrelief's topic in Long-Distance Relationships
I really don't think theres anything else you can do to work around it. It's what she wants and you have to respect that, no matter how much it hurts. My ex wanted a break and I kept hassling him because I didnt want it. He ended up dumping me and I think i pushed him into making a rash decision! I think what you need to do is let her know how you feel about her, and then just sit it out. I know its hard but if its meant to be it will be. I hope everything works out for you! x -
I've been split up with my boyfriend now for six weeks. I loved him more than anything in the world and still do, I thought he felt the same about me, so when it came out the blue that he wanted to split up I was shocked. In the time we've split up he's moved on (it took him two weeks) and that hurts so much, it's come to the point now that I can't even speak to him when I see him because I get too upset. I cried for about three weeks when we split up. I've been strong for the past two weeks, trying to get on with my life and finally accepting the fact that he doesn't want me back. The past two days though, ive been so depressed, i'm so confused as to what I want. I don't know if i miss him or miss having someone there for me, or if I just need a good cry. When I think of him it hurts so much, and even more when I think of him with someone else. Im sad that we havent spoken for two weeks, but he doesnt seem to be bothered. When I see him I just want to throw up! I don't know what to do. I want to get on with my life, I dont want to hurt anymore, but I cant stop thinking about him. What can I do?
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Everyone says things they don't mean when they are upset. In time he will understand this. Dont contact him yet though, give yourself some time, then contact him when your ready. Speaking to him now will only hurt you even more! Keep your chin up and keep smiling x