docz83

What happened to me today must be one of the worst days of my life. I feel like jumping out the window, swallowing pills, cutting myself, but I am not that stupid and I won't do anything these things. I wrote a thread a week or 2 ago. Don't quite remember. But it was about a girl from Singapore that I could to know over myspace. Well we both fell in love with each other so to say, as much as one can over myspace. She gave me feelings that I never thought I would ever feel. And I am not a dating newb, i have gone out and I have met girls online and eventually met them, well ones that are closer to me in distance. But "Ann" (not real name) made me feel like I do not NEED anything in this world anymore but her. We have been sort of together for 2 months and I was planning on visiting her in October. Its been a rough ride. We have had our couple of arguments, here and there. We got back together. The other night she was on the way out with her friends and I called her in through Skype. I honestly was so depressed that day and didnt feel like talking, but just wanted to hear her voice.. Well the call was short, although she didnt want me to hang up at first, she later then said go go... anyways I wrote her back saying what I felt and I was sorry, but she basically said she was sick of my attitude that this whole thing was bull * * * *. We didnt talk for one long tortureous day, no SMS, no email, no MSN, nothing... I called her this morning and she said the whole deal was over cause she couldnt wait for October and even if she did and I came for one week, then what? We would wait for another 3 to 6 months? Anyways... she believes it would be best not to even be friends, but it feels deep inside her she still would want something from me. I can feel it in her voice and the way she says things. She is like MAYBE we shouldnt be friends, I ask her is that what you really think and want? And then she says, dont put me on the spot, etc... I am so lost..... I dont know what to do... I am hurting so bad inside....

File for sexual harassment, the guy always get the short end of the deal.... Let that be a lesson to you men out there with such stupid and sick jokes..

Well I read over what you wrote.. You know you are absolutely right about the blogs part, I plain and simple shouldnt read them. Yet sometimes it seems as if she wants me to read them. I mean you can set blogs to private or public or to a preferred list and I am on her preferred list... Anyways I will do myself some good and not read them anymore, thats good. And about taking it a step to far as we havent ever met, you know I have been thinking about not committing and being serious about it until we meet, but sometimes I think about her saying what she does to me. Saying she will commit and she wont date another guy or anything. Of course she could be saying that to make me feel good, but ya... I wont commit fully, but I wont go out tmrw with the intention of getting hooked up with a girl. If it happens it happens, but I really like "Ann" and really want to be together with her.. Well let us see what happens in the following 6 months... geee thats a bloody long time. haha, but I am determined and optimistic

Ok...Where to begin..... Ahh let me start out from where and when I met her, or as who I will refer to as Ann (Not being her real name). I currently live in Vienna, Austria and I was in Thailand for a semester. Doing a study abroad program through my university. This is not one of your Thai love stories about a girl who steals all my money, no no.... haha so keep reading.... My being in Thailand really has not a lot to do with it, just that around this time and place is where I met her. Well not quite all the details... During my spring break, I happened to fly to Singapore for a short vacation. As I heard it was a great country to travel to and I did. Oh do I have to tell you I fell in love with the place. It really is exactly the type of place I want to live in. Well as I flew back to Thailand, I was overexcited about getting to know Singapore even more. Soooo I logged onto my myspace account and I tried looking for people who lived in Singapore. Male, Female, nationals, residents.. whoever.... I didnt really care to necessarily MEET the people, but wanted to know more about the country. Stuff I couldnt find out by buying books and stuff... Well I so happened to have met Ann...I added her to my friends list and we started talking. We didnt talk much in the first two months of us meeting. We had exchanged MSN emails to we could chat, making it easier for us. As March passed, April passed, and then soon after May too, we got to know each other quite well, well... as well as you could over the internet. I really liked her and I thought she was such a cool person. She was everything I was and everything I wasnt at the same time. She carried qualities that I found in myself and some that I didnt have which I was really interested in. Let me tell you... Getting information on Singapore (from her) was shortlived, in a sense that especially from her, I had lost temporary interest in finding out about the ins and outs of Singapore, but more about the ins and outs about her. I really go interested in her.. I had cravings to chat with her after we ended out chat sessions... When May came around, I had 2 weeks left before my semester ended and I was going to head back to Vienna. To my surprise, she ended up giving me her phone number. She keeps telling me that she initiated the phone number thingy, but I am sure I remember asking her about her number once.. ya maybe she agreed to it.. whatever.. I called her up once or twice in Thailand.. THe first time I heard her laugh... the blindness that is associated to love struck me... Her laugh is absolutely one of the most beautiful and it still keeps me energetic whenever I hear it. Its so beautiful. Her voice is amazing. Soon after, i was back home in Vienna again and my summer term had started. As I am graduating soon (October to be exact) I had planned on visiting her for my first vacation that I get from work. Once i get a job after graduating. As it works in Europe, most companies allow you to take your "leave" even if you just started working. You have 2 or 3 weeks a year starting off and you are free to take them whenever you want. Well thats far from happening right now.. I am just saying... The first few times we talked over the phone in Austria, we argued. BAD... about different things. We made up, and shook hands so to say cause I really liked her and I didnt want to lose her. We went fine, phoning each other and smsing each other, emailing each other, myspacing each other, etc...... Up until 2 weeks ago when we got into a serious argument again.. NOW... She says it was my fault. In a sense it was.. but she provoked it. On myspace, with those of you who are familiar, you can set up blogs. Often she writes blogs, lately they have only been about me. She writes good ones about how she likes me etc.... and sometimes she writes stuff, like "This path I have take and done, can it be undone." etc..... She writes blog titles that seem to congrue with our relationship, but she sets them on private. So I read the title and I misunderstand. Well she did so similarly before our argument, i misunderstood, thinking she was into another guy. Well i called, got pissed off, raised my voice... and hung up.. Dumb thing to do.. THis went on for 24 or more hours. We finally found time to talk and we settled it.... Now let me scroll back a bit... About a month after I was back in Vienna already. We both told each other what we felt. There was a mutual interested. I really liked her soo much, that I have begun to find all females in my presense bland compared to Ann, although I have never met Ann, face to face. I have seen pictures and she constantly updates her myspace and sends me pictures. She is gorgeous, ethnic Javanese, but Singaporean. She is everything i desire and I do not say this to every girl I meet. When I say it I say it... and I mean it. Of course I have never met her face to face and I am a little shut door just to be careful that I wont get too hurt if meet her and she is everything I didnt expect in a bad way, but I am taking this with a grain of salt and happy and enthusiastic. Anyways, she has told me what she felt for me. Although it took her more time. She liked me a lot, always messaging me about how she misses me, etc.. and without me having to initiate it. Which is a good sign. Well as the month passed by and now we are in July.. or almost... haha We fell in love. I did before her.. I couldnt help it. As everyday passed I longed for her more and more and still do. She is on my mind constantly, she has the power to shift my mood so much with things she writes on myspace... I thought she would never love me, but eventually she told me she loved me too and has been writing it on myspace too. She told me that she was afraid of saying it that I might think she was saying it just for the sake of saying it, but she repeated it a few times, not as often as I have, but she did and I am really happy... Well a few things about her.. She tells me she is really insecure. She often thinks about our relationship, if it will ever work out. I mean you do have to see the situation we are in, she in Singapore and me in Austria, thats soooo far away.. She also says though, as soon as she thinks of me, she feels happy again, she says, I am her pillar of strength that I help her feel comfortable. I want to. I love her a lot that I am willing to do just about anything in the realm of possible. Just today she wrote a two blogs, both on private which kinda shocked me. She often said that these things she writes to test me. See my reaction. I told her that I dont like them and they always make me feel bad. At times I feel that she doubts the situation so much that she is about to pull back or I said or did something which i totally dont remember and she got pissed off... But I called her on Skype today...(Both our phone bills will surpass the allowed..So we both fear our parents will be mega angry). She said everything was fine, she said you have a choice to read the blogs, your curiosity is your doom, and then I told her that if it has nothing to do with me, why she set it on private so i couldnt read. I thought we have reached the level of trust and love that we should share everything with each other. She didnt say anything. I was interrupted by my dad, I needed to help him with something. I told her I would call her in the evening. Well the evening hasnt arrived yet, so I will still call her.. Anyways she seemed sort of cheerful or happy when I called her.... I wont be able to visit her until probably either after my graduation or sometime after Christmas. This is due to money and time. For one she has school and it would be pointless for me to visit her if she is busy and I have no cash, well not enough for a trip. Reason why I decided to visit her, is cause she has no money either and the job she is doing doesnt pay her enough and she is still like full in univeristy as she is like 2 years behind me. She said she will visit me next year. Well we will see about that. We will see if we last until Christmas. I keep telling her that it will and I am determined. I am, cause I really love her and want it to work out and she says she does too. Ah well... I am just a bit confused and I would be curious to know if there are any of you in a similar situation or were in a similar situation and how it worked out or not.... I am not REALLY looking for an answer. I think that is what many people come online for and hopelessly look for an answer to all their problems, as if God where residing on enotalone. But I know thats not the case and I just would like to hear your comments, whether supporting my cause for her or not. I can tell you one thing. I have immense strength and stamina for this. Although at times I do feel depressed and hurt about certain things, I just need to think about what can become and her laughter and I am fit again for the day... I hope she feels the same..... Any comments and opinions are welcome... Like to hear them! Best regards, Martin from Austria

Alright, this is confusing me so much, I could seriously explode. Right I have known this girl since we both started at a university here in Vienna. Before we actually knew each other, I would always receive the look. You know when I was talking to other girls and stuff she would give me this cold look and a lot of times just smile at me for no reason. Well when we got to know each other we went out twice. And it seemed to go find socially. But after the second time, she got a job back home and kept going home every weekend. Well she comes from the Czech Republic and since its right next door to Austria its easy, only 1 and a half hours. Since we both have soo much damn work during the week and she is gone on teh weekends, well u know not much we can do. But yet in school she always looks at me very interestingly, comes up to talk to me and for her bday I gave her a present which meant a LOT to her, well at least that is what she told me. I even went to Egypt two weeks ago for spring break, my parents live there and I bought her a souvenir, a silver necklace with hieroglyphics, very nice piece and she seemed to like it and told me that I was very sweet, blah blah blah..... yeah well I am sure she knows that I like her.. I mean its obvious. But I don't know she just confuses me. What I am hoping for is that she will come to Egypt with me for a week in the summer, before she actually buys the ticket, I will tell her what I feel for her. If she still wants to come with me, well then it will be quite obvious and might work out, if not well yeah thats that.... But can someone still give me advice on SOMETHING! something that will calm me down, lol....... I need help, somehow.... "LINDA, U DRIVE ME CRAZY!!" In a good way of course........ lol.....

Well I found out her bday the first week I meet her, and its been months now and I heard from a friend that she is having a party and has invited my friend... But I didnt get an invitation... there OBVIOUSLY is a problem.... But I am think of just telling her straight out.. That if she has a problem with me, she should tell it to me, cause I don't like people that pretend to be your friends or whatever...

My dad is a diplomat and I have moved more than 10 times from school to school inmy entire life.. and the first few times I was scared to death, but trust me, it ain't so bad. ANd after a while you will appreciate it, just the fact that u know soo many people and have such good friends....

Yeah, anyways, I am not ready to give up my life for some girl or anything like some of these people, but I really would like some help or some tips... K, I have a feeling that this girl I like is ignoring me, I don't really know why, at the beginning we both had a splendid time and all, we got along real well, but now suddenly, it seems as if she is backing off..I Invited her to my birthday party which is coming up on the first of march and hers is on the 22nd of February and I didnt get an invitation from her, but my friend did. Somethings wrong thats for sure, I mean I could still get an invitation, but I doubt I will, I am EXTEREMELY paranoid, but sort of feel depressed... I don't, I have a lot of girls around me all my life and still do, its just she, the one I really like.. I don't know........... HELP! lol.. or I will jumP! haha... If u guys cant Help I understand..

My friend has been telling me all the time, that I am TOO nice with girls. That if I am ever interested in a girl, and ask her out on the first date or so, I should not seem available for the next couple of weeks or so. I should maybe even be a bit rude or just sometimes ignore her. Cause girls like it when they have to work to get you. So if something ever happens between the girl and I, like an argument, that I should not apologize immediately, I should wait till the next day or so, cause then she would be really waiting for it and would appreciate it more. I don't know, he is confusing me, I am not used to being that way, I have had two gf already by just being nice, though I have to admit it was hard getting them.. Right now I seemed to be getting along with this one girl quite well, today I sent her an SMS on her Mphone to ask if she wanted to hang out on the weekend and somehow it got into an argument and both her and I got really pissed off, well as I am, I immediately sent back an SMS saying what an IDIOT I was and apologized, wishing for her forgiveness.. Maybe I am annoying her too much, just give it some time... I dont know...... i would REALLY appreciate some help here........... Thank you.. I am feeling all a bunch of different emotions , but most of all at myself... for being an idiot...

haha thanks dude, hah yeah I know about that cafe, I am Austrian myself, although I have only lived in austria for 2 years. But again, thank u!

Well, there is this girl (I dont want to use her real name, I will just call her L) in my university, she has a class with me. I have known her for about a month now. Sometimes I get the feeling that she is always looking at me, I can sometimes notice from the side of my eye that she is looking at me, but when I look at her, she looks away. Other than that I am not noticing any signs.. WELL, we have become good friends, I even took her out to dinner and to a cocktail bar. According to her, she had fun, whether she lied or not, I am not sure. WELL, at the end of the date, I escorted her home half way, since we took the subway, I had to make my way home too, so I would not miss my train. So I just took her to her subway line. As we were waiting for the train to come, she moved a bit closer to me and was looking at me, well I was talking to her, but she pulled out her chap stick and started using it. Did she expect a kiss or something or was that just normal? Since I am a European, Austrian and also LIVE in Austria, it is not tradition like the Americans to kiss on the first date. Just to add something, before the date we were SMSing on our mobile phones and she at first thought this was a group thing, so i said no, I we would go alone and I asked her if it were okay. What she said shocked me.. She said that as long as I am not expecting anything it is okay with her.. Well I replied with a shocking answer and was like how could she think that of me. She wrote back saying that she didnt mean to upset me, she just doesnt know me too well. Well things have developed. Last weekend L went home for the weekend, she comes from the Czech Repulic, so she went back home to Prag to visit school friends and family, its a 4 hour ride by train. Well this weekend she is going home again. So I have come to a conclusion, IF she really liked me she'd would rather stay and hang out with me. What is killing me, is she always sits next to me in class, I see her starring at me, she always follows me during break.. SO I don't get it, can someone who understands this help me out, PLEASE!!! I swear I am about to get a nervous breakdown here! hehe