I've had a lot of stress over the past few years...I got married at 15(I'm 17 now) my husband was physically and emotionally abusive to me) I'm not with him anymore though my mom was suicidal when I was growing up my parents just got divorced oh I had a daughter at 16(from my husband) anyway the list goes on....so basically I went through a drug problem to cope, but I've gotten passed that now...I thought I was better after some intensive counseling but over the past couple weeks I got a boyfriend who is just awesome to me...he's really everything a girl could want, yet I find myself in a deeper hole of depression than I've been in since my husband, and I just keep wanting to hurt myself all the time....I'm constantly fighting myself not to cut myself or stab myself(I have done a couple small cuts but nothing big yet) And for some reason I find it more emotionally painful to have sex with him, the person I love, than to have sex with some random guy I don't love why?????
