SheHazCatEyez

Reading what you just wrote to me seems like you already have an answer somewhat if you can try to gather it more clearly.She's hinting and blowing u off saying shes to busy for u most of the time,and then when yall finally do find a time to get together she wants to bring a friend?? when u really care 4 someone you want to enjoy there company and find some kind of time compromise to atleast be able to just grab some lunch,movie,or slip them a letter,phonecall or something to let the other person know your atleast thinking of them when u cant be 2gether.I can pretty much grasp the concept myself and i dont even know her..Shes young,confused,not ready to settle down and obviously is to busy to have any type of relationship.But looks like right now shes more focused on other things besides trying to get together with you.I'm sorry for being blunt,but just the way i am,dont string it along or sugar coat anything.Best thing to do is to lie low let her make the first move.If she dosent put effort in it then u need to move on and find someone who wants what u do.Best thing to do is let her make the call,let go and see what happens.But i think u already know the outcome.yall r both young and 2 much out there to ponder away about such immature mess.I know u love her and im sure she feels some sort of feelings for u,but maybe shes just not ready.you NEED to talk to her about how u feel and see what she has to say b4 doing anything,but if she still acts like the busy bee,ect lie low,do ur own thang babe.

My thoughts on the situation from me being a female and knowing the type of rejections we use towards men.Sounds to me as if shes trying to cut ties slowly without saying it bluntly.I know from being a female as what we sometimes do to try and pull away from a relationship we no longer are satisfied with and that is lessen conversations,sex, hanging out with the girls more than usual,not as affectionate,limiting time spent 2gether,and definitely cutting the cell off if we know you'll be calling. We try to avoid being straight forward for the fear of hurting the other person so we tend to use those type of things to try and give them a hint hoping maybe he'll end it first or atleast notice the lack of advances were showing and hoping maybe he'll see that there is some sort of problem in our relationship.Then again,women can't stand to be checked up on that makes us feel distrusted and we will tend to rebell against the relationship for that main purpose.But,she may be in a point in her life where shes trying to realize what she wants in life and she thinks that you may be interfering with that and needs time to figure it out without you bothering her to maybe see if what she wants is you or if shes better off with you.Maybe you should give her some time to spend with her friends for awhile and you do your own thang and see if she comes around cause if you act like its not a big thing she'll start noticing she better get right before she looses what she has and maybe realizes your slipping away slowly.The only way the other person is gonna see how there actions are affecting you is by doing the same thing to them and they'll begin to see how it feels to be treated equally.As i said the best thing is to lie low for a bit and see if she comes around and if it's a phase shes going through or if it's the beginning of the end.Don't call her,see if she calls you.You can't be the only one putting forth effort and if shes not willing to put fourth the effort then you got your answer. I hope this helps you in some way,and i know it'll be hard to do for a few days but try it you may get your answer soon enough.Another thing if your questioning that she may be cheating, then you need to narrow down the reasons why she is giving you that impression and see if they outweigh the reasons why she couldnt be.But,usually the heart already knows the answer to that by the feeling you get when you question it..The heart knows so ask yours could it be that she is or am i just over reacting?Atleast try and talk to her regarding the way her actions are making you feel and see what she has to say about it,but if she dosen't respond in the way you want her to proceed with the doing unto her and she is doing to you then sooner or later you will have your answer.

I know it's hard for you going through so much right now at the same time. But it seems your husband dosen't have a problem handling relationships,seems the problem is handling responsibilities.As your about to have a child you may learn your husband is still acting like one himself.As you stated he has 3 others who he hasnt really been a father to and now he knows he's now married to the woman whos carrying his unborn child and will be living in the same household as this child,were he will be needed and expected to be there,take responsibilty and that could be to much for him when he's never really had that kind of responsibilty before.So,he could be running from the marriage because of the commitment to be a father.thereforeeee, he could be afraid of failure or he is just not ready for it.You need to let him know that regardless if the two of u stay 2gether or not that you want him to be a part of this childs life.Let him know he needs to step up to the plate because behind him is a woman and a child who love him very much.I posted a little of advice on divorce If you would like to read it,here it is again. you can close your eyes to the things you dont wont to see,but you cant close your heart to the things you dont wont to feel A divorce is like a new house that you've worked so hard to build with so much time,effort,thought,and care invested in it,then having a tornado come and destroy it.So you can either wait for someone else to come along with the bulldozer to haul off the remaining pieces so you can start over with a fresh new design OR you can pick up the remaining pieces,start rebuilding by hand and make sure you build a more solid foundation and disaster proof it as much as possible this time around.Divorce is a hard thing for anyone involved,but staying were your not happy is gonna be the hardest in the long run.So whichever you choose(packing up and walking out to move on) and saying "Here comes to the rest of my life" or (staying in it when u are unhappy),then your gonna be stuck saying "There goes my life". But,you got to think what makes you happy,what you want in the future,and if you don't see a lasting marriage in it,then by no means get out.Quit postering the idea or bickering about how unhappy you are and do something about it,cause no one can make that decision but you.Only you know what it's gonna take to make you happy.Yes,some have children involved and that makes things even harder. Though,we always try to put our kids best interests first.Does there best interest include a household environment thats full of fussing,arguing, tension,ect ?.I don't think any child would choose that environment, Because when they see this it's even worse on them than having 2 divorced parents.But I can tell you this..Women usually tend to stay in the marriage because they've become so dependent on there husbands that they feel they cant make it on there own and have lost there confidence to be independent.So,some men take that as a advantage.Because,when they know this they tend to lack respect for there wives,which lead them to run over the woman knowing the wife won't leave.But,for men they tend to stay in the marriage for fear of loosing something(there assests,alimony,fear they won't be able to see there children,ect.And yes..women tend to use there kids as a leverage over there husbands knowing if they do that the husband wont leave.So the only solid advice I can offer is that if you do decide to divorce try your best to end it in a good way,on some sort of civilized level.So,if you really want to do whats best for the kids atleast do that and for those who choose not to divorce>I wish you the best and good luck on rebuilding that new house.(Remember it requires 2 hands to build it,so don't be afraid to let the other person know it needs there help to). U know getting a divorce teaches you both new things and with what you've learned,you may find your way back to each other one day.Then again,a divorce can be just like a death in which you loose them forever.

you can close your eyes to the things you dont wont to see,but you cant close your heart to the things you dont wont to feel A divorce is like a new house that you've worked so hard to build with so much time,effort,thought,and care invested in it,then having a tornado come and destroy it.So you can either wait for someone else to come along with the bulldozer to haul off the remaining pieces so you can start over with a fresh new design OR you can pick up the remaining pieces,start rebuilding by hand and make sure you build a more solid foundation and disaster proof it as much as possible this time around.Divorce is a hard thing for anyone involved,but staying were your not happy is gonna be the hardest in the long run.So whichever you choose(packing up and walking out to move on) and saying "Here comes to the rest of my life" or (staying in it when u are unhappy),then your gonna be stuck saying "There goes my life". But,you got to think what makes you happy,what you want in the future,and if you don't see a lasting marriage in it,then by no means get out.Quit postering the idea or bickering about how unhappy you are and do something about it,cause no one can make that decision but you.Only you know what it's gonna take to make you happy.Yes,some have children involved and that makes things even harder. Though,we always try to put our kids best interests first.Does there best interest include a household environment thats full of fussing,arguing, tension,ect ?.I don't think any child would choose that environment, Because when they see this it's even worse on them than having 2 divorced parents.But I can tell you this..Women usually tend to stay in the marriage because they've become so dependent on there husbands that they feel they cant make it on there own and have lost there confidence to be independent.So,some men take that as a advantage.Because,when they know this they tend to lack respect for there wives,which lead them to run over the woman knowing the wife won't leave.But,for men they tend to stay in the marriage for fear of loosing something(there assests,alimony,fear they won't be able to see there children,ect.And yes..women tend to use there kids as a leverage over there husbands knowing if they do that the husband wont leave.So the only solid advice I can offer is that if you do decide to divorce try your best to end it in a good way,on some sort of civilized level.So,if you really want to do whats best for the kids atleast do that and for those who choose not to divorce>I wish you the best and good luck on rebuilding that new house.

I know exactly what you are going through.I recently just experienced this situation myself.My best friend "D" and my ex"T" have been hanging out,though when me and T were together neither one of them liked each other.She said that they've become buddies now and she talks to him about guys,issues,ect.But I have to admit she did have the honesty to tell me this,and also that they kissed and who knows what else and that it just happened,but they found it was a mistake and since have become pals only and dont like each other like that.We ended up not talking for awhile because I was so hurt and felt betrayed when she knew how much i had loved him,but it was a lesson in friendship i learned to forgive and forget once,but if it happens twice there will not be one.So,make sure you know exactly whats going on before distrusting your friend or jumping to any conclusions.Plus, we know how guys can be at times and wanna try and get close to your friends just so they can get the scoop on you.lol