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ohsweetlove11

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Everything posted by ohsweetlove11

  1. ohsweetlove11
    Congrats!!! Don't worry, it'll come. I didn't feel excited or anything either, just the same thing. I want him gone. I keep dreaming about him. It sucks.
  2. ohsweetlove11
    Day 30. Made it.
  3. ohsweetlove11
    Day 29. Didn't even realize is but yesterday was 4 weeks to the day. I've been dreaming about him a lot lately, so I wake up thinking about him, which sucks. But I'm ok. I can actually listen to our music/songs now and not get hurt. It's getting better. Really focusing on me. I go running/hiking every day now.
  4. ohsweetlove11
    Day 24. Missing him today. Last couple days have been hard.
  5. ohsweetlove11
    So I had a moment of weakness and ALMOST checked his twitter on my phone but decided against it. Two days ago, a really cute guy and I sat in front of each other on the subway. We looked at each other and smiled ridiculously big smiles. I got up at my stop, he was still sitting down. So I walked out. I look back at where he was sitting and he was gone. So I smile, turn around, and say "Why did I have a feeling you were getting off?" He laughed and asked me if he could see me again. I gave him my number. The guy is HOT. If anyone here is watching The Bachelorette (don't judge!), he looks like Ryan P. Except with a Romanian accent. Suuuuuuuper hot. So I kinda want to see where that goes. It's been 3 weeks, A is obviously happy or he would've texted or called or something... he would've contacted me by now. So I'm moving on I've had enough with the weight gain too, been exercising a lot. Hiking, runs, walks, I bought a mountain bike yesterday too and I've gone on 2 rides so far. So I'm trying to make positive changes that don't concern A at all. Life is actually good right now. Everyone, it DOES get better. First 2 weeks were HELL for me, but once I decided to stop sulking and stop looking at his twitter, he started fading away. YOU CAN DO THIS. You can. There's NO ONE you "can't live without." No one.
  6. ohsweetlove11
    Truly is. I know absence is supposed to make the heart grow fonder and all, but not in this case! lol
  7. ohsweetlove11
    Day 21. 3 weeks. I feel good.
  8. ohsweetlove11
    Day 19? I think. I was doing great the last couple days but today I'm struggling a little bit. Dreamed about him so I woke up thinking about him. Sucked. But I'm trying to pull through. It's just hard.
  9. ohsweetlove11
    Day 14. Still haven't heard from him. He was in town this weekend, made no attempt to contact, nothing. I miss him. Trying to keep strong.
  10. ohsweetlove11
    Do not cave! You're doing great.
  11. ohsweetlove11
    Day 12. Really need some support. He's in town. Very hard not to contact him, though I'm positive he's spending time with her at his cousin's wedding. I really need help right now, I'm going insane.
  12. ohsweetlove11
    A, You're here in town... I wish I could see you. I miss you so much right now. There's so much I want to tell you I'm a wreck today knowing you're actually here... probably with her, too. So i'm beside myself right now. I feel very empty. I miss you.
  13. ohsweetlove11
    Day 11. Add me to the "wish you were dead" club. Dreamed about him last night. I have good days and bad days. And I wish it would just stop. One dya I'll hate him and think I'm over him, next I'm all sad and pathetic and mising him. Do you even miss me, A? Cause I miss you. And I * * * * ing hate you. I know you'll be in town this weekend for your cousin's wedding, and you're prob bringing K. I * * * * ing hope you miss me. * * * * * * * .
  14. ohsweetlove11
    Day 9 Still NC. He hasn't tried to contact me yet, which I'm still conflicted over. Nevertheless... he's changed so much in a week, from what I can see in short glimpes on Twitter. During our relationship we were both straight edge... now he goes out a lot and drinks. Way to not really believe in it, A.... I'm so disappointed in him, and I'm actually disgusted. I was doing great up til today. I actually hated him a bit. But now I'm missing him a lot and the hole in my heart seems to be growing. Could use some strength.
  15. ohsweetlove11
    Day 7. He seems to have forgotten me. i'm a mess.
  16. ohsweetlove11
    A, I blocked you on fb but we have mutual friends... saw you're drinking again. Thought you liked being straight edge with me? Was that just another one of those things you did for me when you didn't really believe it? Your ring is back on your hand too... guess you and K are back together. You're killing me.
  17. ohsweetlove11
    A, Had a dream about you. Woke up upset. I'm still suffering and you're not.
  18. ohsweetlove11
    Day 4 Having a very hard time. I will admit though, it's nice not to have my phone constantly on me. We used to texted straight from 7am to 7pm (when I got off work) with about 20 calls through the day. We were totally codependant and I'm seeing that now. Pretty sure I was well on my way to cancer with how much my phone was around. ha. Small victories.
  19. ohsweetlove11
    A, You had promised me you'd wait til the end of June to get back in touch with her. I saw you posted on her Twitter. So yeah. I jsut want to thank you, i guess, for this final kick in the teeth.
  20. ohsweetlove11
    A, Had a dream that relived the breakup. Starting to hate you.
  21. ohsweetlove11
    Day 3. Trying to push through.
  22. ohsweetlove11
    A, I can't believe you haven't called or texted. I am drowning here. I wish I at least knew you were suffering.
  23. ohsweetlove11
    A, I miss you. I'm pretty sure you've told your ex that you and I are over. Great. I'm glad it took you all of 2 days to be over me. You've made me feel like nothing, like I never meant anything. Every single word you said...? Useless. I hope I can forget you soon. It's so damn hard though. 2nd day in a row I wake up thinking about you and it kills me. I wish it would stop. I don't want to think about you like I do. Because I know you're probably not thinking about me. You're not trying to contact me, you're deleting me from your life. You suck. You just plain suck. I don't believe you ever loved me anymore. Yet I still love you. And I still miss you.
  24. ohsweetlove11
    A, I can't believe you just did this to me. 4 years trumped 6 months, sure, but you called me your soulmate when you didn't even call her that. You said our connection was stronger. We knew how to communicate and we were always honest with each other, and now I feel like everything was a lie. I hate that you missed her so much you dumped me back for her. I hate that you love her. I hate her, and I think I might hate you. You were everything to me. And I love how quickly you seem to be over me. I don't know for sure of course. You might be hurting. But you're relieved we're over. And I hate you... but I love you. No contact sucks. I miss you. I miss you on gmail chat. I miss our band. I miss skyping. It's 11:17 right now, "our time"... and it's breaking me. I miss you. I hope she's worth it. But I do hope you suffer from losing me. A part of me wants to know so badly that you're crying yourself to sleep. But you're probably not. you're probably fine because you'll get her back and everything will be perfect and you'll both be so deluded. Maybe reality will catch up with you that it won't work out, or maybe it's meant to be and you'll be happy with her forever. Either way. I hope you miss me. Goodbye.
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