sunnz

Thanks yeh thats exactly what i was thinking...that's what I don't want ...so throw him off a bit...because I think he will be expecting me to come back exactly that day...but I can easily go another few weeks...I really did get myself back together and am thankful I no longer feel pain...

another one with a short 2 - 3 month relationship but we had contact everyday...etc...future talks etc we both wanted a future together right from the very beginning and throughout the relationship I'm on day 25 [6 weeks since break up] no contact however we spoke briefly 2 weeks after break up when I was in nc for those 2 weeks...anyway he said he wanted me to sort myself out to prove to him I am what he wants...means no texts contact etc...and I had said how do I prove if he cut me off ? do I come back in a month ? how ? and he said yep come back in a month... so the month is nearly up [a few days left]...what does other think ? should I come back like we both agreed upon ? I was thinking delaying it longer for another week or two just so we have more time and it doesn't show I am hanging on that exact month to contact...which I am not I am perfectly fine and back to my normal single independent self... I have essentially let go and believe what will be will be...however I *feel* that keeping nc for a little longer gives me the control back... any help on this ? thanks

I've written here just the other day...however... The best thing i did today ...well 1am in the morning after I woke and had enough thinking of him was...deleted every fb message of his [they were sentimental sweet messages of future together blah blah]...every text...his phone number [that was deleted a week ago]...blocked and deleted him off msn...he's off fb and I am contemplating to either block him on there or deactivate my account...changed my profile pic to a scenery pic...no need to see me... I tried to get back with him he said I needed to give him space for a month and to come back after a month...he is now getting space from me forever...If he wants me back he will just have to seek me out and nothing less then %100 work it out with me... I feel liberated and free...I usually keep all messages and texts I like to envision those thoughts but once I delete...I finally let go and my mind is free... 1 month broken up...first 2 weeks was NC...I broke NC he was in hospital sick sent a get well message...were going to meet up but then I got pushy...he said needed space both agreed to 1 month space and him saying for me to come back after that...maybe to try again I guess ? Deleting stuff from him takes a weight off my chest... My message is don't hold on to the things they said in the past...messages etc..that is the past...and to me it was all fake and they abandon is the way I feel in my situation...so he can eat space lol... DOn't pursue let them be the ones to make it work...you blow your chances of healing and also you become their pauper...let go and let them see you as the one with power...letting go gives you the power again...as you are no longer the weak...when you don't contact them you are showing strength that they are the pauper now...

what happens if me and my ex both agree to NC for a month ? I asked him to try again with me if I give him space and prove that I change my behaviour [behaviour was acting needy for the last week before break up it made his attraction go - put off]...he said I need to do a lot to prove to him I am what he wants which includes no texts it is *stressful* for him and that I need time away from him to sort myself out...I asked how do I prove come back after a month of no contact ? and he said yep come back in a month... Broken up for a month...did 2 week NC then back to texting each other then I badgered him with texts we were going to meet up but after I kept changing my mind or trying to set a date thats when he said I was hounding him and I need to give him a lot of space and sort myself out... I'm currently back on NC day 9 By the way I have no problems with NC I am not heart broken [was the first week of break up] needy anymore...I do recover quite quickly...back to myself...it was a short [but intense] 3 month relationship so maybe that's why ? Him telling me I need to sort myself out brought the kick to my butt and woke myself up...as I am not technically a needy person..I require my space a whole heap...aloof type person...however in the heat of the moment of not getting what I want yep I became someone I am not...not anymore though... Just think it's better for myself to get a *grip* immediately or hurt myself with crap stress ...rather *wake up* now...then ruin myself over someone... my question is should I really come back in a month ?? I really want him to contact me first so that I know he misses me...by contacting me first... note re exes getting back: by the way for those wanting to know if exes come back...yes they do with NC...My other ex broke it off after a 10+ year relationship with kids...after a few months of NC/LC..[giving kids the phone for him to talk to] he wanted to try again [in beginning I had done the usual want him back...but stop after couple weeks] anyway after about 6 months he wanted to get back...I decided no I was over him...he tried again another 7 months and tried to be friends I said no I don't need friends have plenty and I said did not want to get back with him...he was the dumper...he regrets it to this day said to my mum...still says on the phone I'm the only one he could ever talk to...he has a gf...and I am not interested in him [been 4 years since break and I don't like him like that anymore]..I keep convo short only about kids...I really dislike talking to him because I am over him...