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Everything posted by adidas7fire

  1. Lol.. thanks Gorax.. I don't think I'm going to take it that far! ;-) I guess my main concern is that I don't want HIM to think that he's the only thing I think about -- meaning, I don't want it to seem as though if he weren't around, I couldn't handle it or that I couldn't find something to occupy my time with. I don't want to suffocate him and seem clingy and that's my main concern for all of this.
  2. blueangel, thanks for your reply, however, my boyfriend and I are not broken up. We are very happy together.. it's just the fact that I think so much about him when I know he's at his job just going through the day with other things occupying his mind such as his website, job, huge family, etc. I have a few close friends that I talk to from time to time but he's got a ton of friends that he converses with... so there's never a dull moment in his life. For me, I'm more on the quiet side with few friends, a substantially small family, and job... but of course I have some hobbies that can pass the time, however, when I get home, I want to devote that time to us and not to my hobbies, you know? I mean, we don't see each other all day... and I miss him like crazy. And to answer the other response, yes, he loves me and plans to marry me in the future -- that's so not an issue.
  3. You can't exactly do hobbies while doing a 8-5 job, ;-), but thank you for that.
  4. Is it possible to train your mind to not think about the person that you love most? What I mean by that is while I'm at work or somewhere where my boyfriend is not with me, I can't help but think about him. It's not a trust issue or anything but it leaves me depressed that he isn't with me and longing for him. I get to listen to the radio when I'm work but it seems like all the songs I hear relate to loving someone or about the holidays and being with the people that you care about. So I was wondering if there was anything that people have done to kind of keep their minds occupied when not around their signif other so that they aren't sad. Thanks!
  5. Wow.. sounds easy enough but with being depressed for a large part of my life... it'll take time and effort. But great idea! He does love me... otherwise he wouldn't say so and he wouldn't be here in our home with me today. Thank you so very much.
  6. DN, Thanks for your response. I've been in a state of depression because I feel as though I've been a bad gf even after he tells me I'm great. We've had our quarrels and instead of learning from them, I dwell on them. We had some about trust issues and even after we both talked it out and agreed that there was no reason for either of us to not trust each other, I feel in my heart that he doesn't think I trust him. How can I just be happy and not worry about the little things? I just want to show him that he truly makes me feel special and loved even if he doesn't show me all the time.
  7. How can a person be truly happy but also feel like they are being taken for granted at the same time? My bf and I have dated for over a year and we have different schedules so our together time is 2 hours before bed. When he walks thru the door at night, I'm hoping he'll swoop me in his arms and tell me how much he's missed me but instead, he comes home, plops on the couch and watches TV or checks his website. I stay quiet and let him do his thing and then he'll ask me what's wrong but how am I supposed to say nicely "I'd like you to spend some time with me, cuddle with me."? And then when I'm by myself for hours on end, my mind starts to wander and I ask myself why can't things be how they were when we first met? He couldn't wait to see me -- he was calling just to say hi -- stuff like that. Now I feel like I'm the one that has to initiate everything and in return, I don't feel as though he appreciates it. I hate the 1-minute happy moods/next minute depressed moods. Any suggestions?
  8. Yes, I can feel pain right smack-dab in the middle of my tummy, about 2 inches below my navel. What I was also thinking was it could just be a tremendous amount of gas built-up from the sunflower seeds I was eating yesterday, right before all this took place. I'm just hoping that's what it is since I've been gas-y (sorry to be so graphic).
  9. With this, it feels like I have a huge bubble in my stomach (mainly gas-related)... do you think that that could have an effect on the matter?
  10. Does anyone have an answer or at least an idea on what this could be? The issue is basically that after my boyfriend and I had sex yesterday, we both just laid there trying to regain our breath. But when I got up to stand, there was a piercing pain in my lower stomach area that still this morning, over 16 hours later, still hurts. It feels like I have to slouch a bit just to make it so that it doesn't hurt when I walk but I've never had it happen like this before. Sometimes when I'm laying down to sleep and roll over onto my stomach, I can push down on my belly and feel exactly where the sharp pain is. Does anyone know what this is or why it's hurting me so badly? Any ways on how to relieve this? I don't want to tell my boyfriend because of the fear that he might think something's wrong with me or that he's not good in the act which is not the case; at the same time, I want to let him know what's going on so because we tell each other everything.
  11. I totally understand where you are coming from. My boyfriend and I moved into his apt after only 4 months of dating but we both knew for sure that we wanted to be together. Now, if she is having doubts about anything, then that should be a sign that she and maybe yall's relationship isn't ready for that step. You may be but yeah, if she is telling you that she isn't willing to do even just a temporary move-in with her mom or even your mom, that's not fair. It's good that you talked to her about it but a relationship is a two-way street. If she isn't willing to compromise something as small as this, in the future, there may be other things that she won't do. I commend you, first of all, on a long-distance relationship. Knowing how hard it would be to not have the one that you love there with you is really tough and then agreeing that you want to move further into the relationship by moving in together... takes a lot of guts. But of course you have to be very sure that it isn't a one-sided agreement nor just because it's convenient. It's a huge step and a commitment in its own way and that's something that you don't want to take lightly. My advice to you is to talk to her again and see if she will at least give it a shot to live at either party's house and if it doesn't work out, then yall can make other arrangements. You'll never know until you try it and everything is worth its one time. Oh, and btw, don't be scared to be out on your own. It's a life-changing step, yes, but it makes you grow up and realize that you're ready to deal with life as an individual. Sure it has good and bad behind every decision but that's part of life and you'll learn how to deal and make the best of everything. I've been out on my own for 5 years now and it's a great feeling. You'll know what I mean once it happens. Good luck and hope everything works out for you.
  12. Emmylu, If he were to know that I was doing this, why wouldn't he tell me? I mean, it would have come up. And he's told me that he's gone into my account as well. I just feel dirty when I'm looking for something that ends up not being there. I guess recently I've gone in there due to his ex of 2 years contacting him and they've been emailing... just made me uncomfortable. I just wished the past would stay the past, that's all. Thanks for your kind yet understanding words.
  13. Ever since my fiance and I broke up over 2 years ago, I've found it extremely difficult to 100% trust the guys I date. I've been in my current relationship for over a year and I plan to marry this guy. There are no secrets in our relationship, only except for the fact that I check his email everyday just to calm my nerves to know that he's not cheating on me (this is how I found out my ex was cheating). I've started doing this for 4 months now and it just seems like routine for me when checking things online. I feel like I'm betraying him inadvertantly but I don't know how to stop. I mean, sure, it's easy to say "just don't log into his account" but the curiosity of who's emailing him and whom he's emailing is what drives me crazy. I know that if he finds out, our trust level is either going to be at ground level or none but I'm trying to find a way to make myself a better. Do you have any suggestions that might help me out?
  14. I totally agree with NotMyself. Time will become your friend and even not your friend because of all the things that will remind you of her. It sucks bad but you have to remind yourself that you weren't the problem and that if it wasn't meant to be, then sobeit. I mean, it's been 2.5 years my fiance and I broke up but even with as much as he hurt me, I can't seem to let what he did go. I'm in the best relationship now and I still have a hard time dealing with the fact that I dwell on things and sometimes it even hurts my relationship now. You just have to take the good with the bad but evenly distribute them. I'm sorry for your loss.. believe me, it felt like no one in the world could help me but you also have to help yourself. Getting on this website after my split was one of the best things I could have ever done and I hope you'll find comfort in others as well. We are always here for you. Good luck!
  15. Would it be wrong to go under an anonymous name and email him, asking he feels about me and try to see what he would say to one of his other friends?
  16. Do you know what sucks? Early this morning I woke up so happy and everything. Then when I saw that he wrote his ex back after telling me that he didn't over 2 days, I felt kinda lied to in a way... like I reminded him he needed to. I know that he just wanted to see where her life took her since they split but knowing that he writes her still just drives my nerves crazy. I mean, I can be like "F it!" one minute and forget about the whole thing and then the next minute my mind will be dwelling on it and makes me just want to tear up. I don't understand it. But despite some beliefs, I do trust him. I mean, a person wouldn't go in half and buy a house with a person they didn't believe they would spend the rest of their lives with, right? I guess my biggest fear is him finding someone else and saying it's over and then taking the house out from under me even though we are joint (we're not married).
  17. Hey guys... has anyone eelse felt the way I'm feeling right now. Scenario is that my boyfriend of over a year is a webmaster for a popular website in the music industry. With that comes the "celebrity-ness" and lots of emails. On top of that, he's had two ex-girlfriends prior to me which is no big deal. What bothers me is the fact that after over 3 years, his ex contacts him, trying to apologize for her behavior as a bitch after they split so they keep emailing each other back and forth. I would think that once you are done with a person and the breakup is final, each would go their separate ways and if involved with someone, would not bring "baggage" back into the present. It really makes me feel uncomfy and I've told him that but I don't want to show him that I can't trust him. I just wanted to know if anyone else would, does, or has felt this way. Thanks.
  18. LOL.. thanks.. I live in Watauga. It's just getting so cool at night that I fear it's cold and hungry.
  19. Even though I know that most people just write about people or themselves on this forum, I feel that animals are also a great part of us. I love my 3-yr-old like he was my son and after returning home yesterday, he was nowhere to be found. He's only an inside cat, declawed, but so sweet and carefree. For a long time, he's figured out how to open doors, especially the ones that lead to outside so I'm thinking that when my bf was leaving for work yesterday morning, my cat Elliott may have slipped out the door without anyone's knowing. I miss the little guy so much I couldn't sleep, haven't been able to think about anything else but him. I worry because at night it's so cold and there's no sign of him anywhere. I've asked the neighbors, posted fliers, called him time and time again and still nothing. Even though he may just be MIA, I can't help but feel a great part of me missing. Please pray for his safe arrival back home and soon. I still believe that he's alive and just been taken in by someone since he will walk up to anyone that calls "kitty kitty".. so please keep your fingers crossed that he makes it home to his momma. Thanks!image removed
  20. Thanks all for your responses. I told him exactly what was bothering me and that made me bawl twice as much. I've been on an emotional rollercoaster and yes, even though I'm glad I was able to speak my mind, I feel terrible since it was a subject we were so touchy on. We both agreed that I need to just breathe, take a moment, and let things go so I don't stress out but it's not something I can just do like flipping a light switch. I've had this happen to me before with past relationships but I value this one more than anything. I guess it's time for me to believe in myself...
  21. Bigbilly, I think you've hit the spot as far as overanalyzing. How do I stop... I have no idea. But I'm falling apart.
  22. I just know that if we have an argument, I'll feel really bad and regret ever not agreeing and just being happy. Sometimes I'll say things that I don't mean and wish they never came out... but the entire time I'm bawling and he told me that I was being overdramatic because every relationship has its tiffs but I want a relationship where there are none. I know it's none realistic but I can't help. He also told me that no relationship is perfect but we can always make it better. What's that supposed to mean? I mean, it's like our love will never be good enough but I don't want to think about that because it already tore me up that he even said that. I'm a person that dwells on things and am doing my best to stop and just move out from whatever issues we might of had... but it's hard to be happy all the time.
  23. But what if hurts so you so much... that it ends up making that person think they're doing something wrong and you can't convince yourself to withhold the tears?
  24. Is it possible to love someone so much that if anyone speaks their name, you get so exhuberant that tears fill up your eyes and you just wish that that person was with you at that very moment? I tend to do that when I read emails from my boyfriend and I'm just wondering if I'm overemotional or if anyone else has experienced this.
  25. Miss M, Do you just take Calcium supplements or a specific type of supplement like St. John's Wort or euchanacia? I believe it to be more muscle-related but then I read about if you sleep on your stomach, the tendency for upper back muscles to worsen is likely and that's what I do because I can't seem to sleep any other way. I try sleeping on my back but I just toss n' turn all night. Ugh, there's no solving me, I promise, but hopefully a chiropractor can fix me and put me back together.
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