catfish1199

I guess I technically broke NC last night, but it was for a good reason. Is this destructive? And I was advised against total NC....... She texted me to ask if I was working at the bar last night. I texted back Yep. A friend of ours had a birthday alot of people she is friends with including her coworkers and her two best friend roommates were in my bar. I didnt mention her to her roommates but I told one of them that I miss them. One of the girls, who loves me, and is friends with her, but not to the point of telling her any inside info, asked me how I was doing. I said really good, but I had to ask one question. I said basically, "Should I just forget about her? because all Ive heard was that NC was the only way I will heal and its the only way I can have her again anyway." She said, in summary, that total NC isnt the best thing. You cant just forget about her and forget about having something down the road. You can grow apart, but you can grow back together. You just have to be available and open if things start to sprout. You kinda became a different person, and she was dealing with alot of different things. Just focus on yourself and keep her in your heart. Just wanted some thoughts on all of this........

Hang in there. I am in the exact same boat. If there is anything for you two in the future, NC is the ONLY way. I tell myself that everyday. I tell myself that I wouldnt be able to have small talk and I definitely dont want to talk about the realtionship. So any talking would really suck anyway.

I just feel like it is sending a more powerful message than just plain NC. It says I dont even want to see what she posts or her name in general while I am in this stage. I am definitely not posting sad stuff, in fact, a rarely post anything at all. I just communicate through PMs. As far as the message. I think it is constructed in a way that if she does tell her, it will be OK, and her knowing why I did it will not be a mystery plus she wont need to message me about why I did it! Thats my rationale anyway. EDIT: I just thought about it and it may have the added bonus of her thinking I dont want her to see me getting messages from other girls. Plus, when I do get those posts from other girls I really dont want her thinking I am trying to make her jealous, that may spark resentment.

Dave, A response from anyone else is very welcome..... I am on day 4 of NC. Day 7 if you dont count thank you and youre welcome texts for the birthday flowers I sent and a drunken Miss ya! text from her. First, I would love it if you would take a look at my thread. I received many valuable answers to my questions, but I would like the Master to check it out. But no rush, I know you have quite a few people hunting you down! Here is the link: Now to my question related to NC..... I have an idea to simutaneously make the impact of NC on her more effective and to accelerate my own healing. I want to delete her as a friend on facebook as well as her 2 girl friends who are now her roommates. I will not send her a message before I do it, and Facebook will not alert her to it. However, I do want to send a message to one of her 2 friends that I plan on deleting saying something to this effect.... I took Tiffany off of my friends list because I want to disappear from her radar. It doesnt make much sense to take her off and keep you on because I will always see her name. I really miss you guys, and I am sure I will see you around. Maybe we can have a drink one night like old times. I had alot of fun with you. What do you think? It should be noted that I am friends, but not close with her best friends boyfriend and his friends. I see their band play occasionally, but only when I am sure she is not there. That is why I know I will bump into her friend at some point.