Jump to content

pewpew

Members
  • Posts

    28
  • Joined

pewpew's Achievements

Rookie

Rookie (2/14)

  • Conversation Starter
  • Week One Done
  • One Month Later
  • One Year In

Recent Badges

1

Reputation

  1. Day 1 - 4/23/08 8:08 AM - 8:20 AM I just told her that I was going to start going into 'No Contact' with her for about 30 days. I let her know how I feel about her and then told her about NC. She is honeslty so heartless sometimes... She said that she is annoyed with me saying "I love you" to her, so I asked "would you rather have me say 'I hate you'?". She said yes, so I told her that I "hate the way she is and the way she acts sometimes is revolting and disgusts me" (which is true). I know why I am doing this. I am doing this because I believe that if we give each other space that when I come back things could be better. I know that I'm so full of * * * * . How could things be better at that point? We will have both forgotten about each other after the 30 days is up. Maybe it will be better that way. Right now I'm just sitting here thinking about her, thinking about how badly I want to be with her. I know that it won't happen unless she wants it to happen. It just hurts knowing that she doesn't want it to happen. Thinking about her right now, have this feeling in my chest that reminds me of her and how much I love her. Sometimes I wish it would just go away so I could move on. Going to bed seeing as how I stayed up all night. 9:35 AM For some reason I'm not exactly able to sleep. I keep thinking about her. I keep thinking that after these 30 days are over she will find someone else. She won't remember me at all anymore. Maybe after these 30 days are over I will realize something about her that I hadn't before? Heh. Who knows. I keep going back and looking at this website where we first met. Reading over things etc. and so on. I should really just stop going there during this time. I feel odd in a way being there though. I feel as if I want to be with her very badly, but then I remember she doesn't want to be with me and I start to feel terrible. 10:00 AM - 10:55 AM I've spent a lot of time talking with friends about her. Seeing what they thought about the whole no contact thing. No one really seems to comment. They all just say that I'm better off without her and its just better if I move on. Its better if I find someone that shows me the same love that I show them in return. The way she is acting towards me is cold and heartless. The girl that I knew before, the one that wamred my heart is the one that I want to remember. Its the reason why I still think positively about her. I realized to myself the only reason that I keep trying with her is that I believe she is saying things negatively to me just to help herself get over me and to help me get over her. I tell mysel that she still loves me, but says those things to help her move on because she knows that the distance between us means we wouldn't be able to be together. 11:00 AM - 12:00 PM I've been playing video games for awhile and talking to people on msn. I keep thinking about her and I keep coming back to this place where we met. I feel like I shouldn't be on that website because I'm trying to the NC thing. I'm technically not contacting her, but going back to that website just reminds me of her even more. I'm going to bed.
  2. Read over this post before making my post this morning I've thought about it and started NC no more than 5 minute ago so .. would that make this day 1?
×
×
  • Create New...