secretguy1607306448

Bleeder had a great idea too... call her and ask her how she is feeling and if anything is wrong... she's not gonna hate you for caring about her enough to ask.

If he says she can't go, then ask "How about we go on _____ instead." If she says yes, then you are set. if she keeps saying no, then she porbably does not want to. Call her back. Offer her another date. See if she takes you up on it. That will help you to know if she really is interested. Good luck.

My advice is to focus on whatever he/she is willing to talk about-- even if it bores you a little. Try to build on whatever he/she says, ask questions, nod, smile, tell brief stories that connect to the conversations. example 1: If you ask him/her about her family and he/she says he/she is close to her brother, ask him/her a question about the brother. Ask what they do together, why he/she likes him so much, etc. Then ask about another aspect of her family rather than shift the topic totally. In other words, whenever you hit a topic he/she *is* comfortable with...stick with it for a little while. Stick in some small jokes, ask more in-depth questions that relate to the topic. Also, don't dwell on yourself, but wen you have a way of connecting to your own life, do it. Say, "I am kind of the same way, because..." Also, you might try a little pop-psychology. As long as you are saying what the guy/girl wants to hear, he/she will probably love to hear you analyze his/her situations. example 2: He/she says, "I need to find myself. I'm thinking of hitchhiking accross the country in the back of a pickup truck." Then you say, "Oh, what a wonderful experience that would be. You know, that's a healthy way to explore your life. It would allow you to experience new things without being held back by people and things in your life." (Now you know darned well he/she's probably not going to actually hitchhike accross the country, but entertain his/her thoughts anyway.) Hope this helps. Thanks.)

If I may offer some constructive advice here: For your son's sake, please wait until the end of the school year. I work in an elementary school building and I have heard many stories from teachers about parents asking them on dates. Honestly, I've never known a teacher that accepted the offer. It's not because there is no attraction, but because it would be incredible akward to walk into a classroom and teach the child whose mother/father you just dated. When the year is over, find an excuse to contact the teacher and pursue your interest then. I think it'll be better for you, better for the teacher, and better for your son. You should go for it...just not now.

One of the incredible things about the Internet is the ability to be anonymous. It fosters honesty, but generally allows people the opportunity to lie without consequences. Because of e-mail, chat rooms, and forums like this one, people can express their deepest feelings freely without risking embarrassment or feeling guilt. The Internet provides us access to an unlimited number of pop-psychologists, anonymous friends, and virtual lovers. It's amazing...but I digress. My advice, in a nutshell is, be extremely careful. If you inquire about his personal life, he may choose not to share information with you. If he does not, then he has reasons for wanting to remain anonymous. If you do end up sharing information-- telephone numbers, addresses, pictures, etc.-- be sure you know and trust him like an old friend. Giving information out freely can be dangerous. I don't mean to sound like I'm on a soap box. I have seen friends find true love online. I know someone who travelled over 4,00 miles to meet his companion. There was, however, a mutual trust built up over a long period of time and many precautions were taken. Good luck.

Sisterlynch, you are probably right. I hate to think she's playing dumb and don't know how I feel, but there's a chance she could be doing just that. I know she's not seeing anyone now because she has always told me a good deal about her relationships with others. I guess because she's always been so open with me I hoped I'd have a good chance at winning some romance here. When I see her next, I'll scope her out a little more and take your advice. I'll see how she reacts to hand-holding, if the opportunity presents itself. And I'll talk with her about our current relationship and work on complimenting her. It's good advice for testing the waters. Thank you. Anything beyond that, though, and I think I ought to back off. If she has been catching my signals, she's could be ignoring them in order to preserve our friendship. Oh yes... I like your tagline, Sisterlynch. "Lolve is friendship that catches fire..." It's practically my inspiration here.

Thanks for your advice and help! Here's an update on today's outing with this girl I was writing you all about: We went to the movies and to lunch today. We both had a great time, as usual. I tried to drop a few subtle hints: Told her how easy she was to talk to; Reminded her that we always have fun together; Looked at her eyes more than I normally would have; smiled at her jokes more. Paid for her lunch and drinks afterwards (we usually split the check). Sadly, I don't think she noticed any of this. We're still just pals. I didn't have the courage to tell her about my feelings of attraction outright, but our friendship is still strong. I'll probably see her again next weekend when we're both off. Normally we hang out in the afternoon. I was thinking of asking her to do something later in the evening. Do you think this would be a better atmosphere for transforming friendships into relationships? I love being anonymous on the Internet. It allows me to talk about problems in my life that I normally wouldn't share with anybody. Thanks to you all for responding. Any additional comments or advice would be GREATLY appreciated.

Keep the ring. I, personally, think that giving gifts back to an ex is a sign on an immature breakup. It's like saying, "You've given me nothing worthwhile and I don't want to remember you." I know breaking up is not a happy time, but hopefully that's not the message you want to send. Keep the ring to remember the good times. Use the break-up as an opportunity to move away from the bad times.

A+ adivce!! Thanks for posting this!

I am a 25 year-old guy who has a 24 year-old friend (girl). We hang out every couple of weeks or so-- go bowling, the movies, whatever-- but we've never been more than pals. Sometimes we're with firends; other times we're alone. Never kissed. Never held hand. Never even talked about being together. I am-- and have been for some time now-- attracted to her romantically. I don't want to ruin our friendship, but I do want to find out if she is interested in moving our current relationship forward. I am going to the movies with her tomorrow. We'll probably get something to eat afterwards. How can I send subtle signals? I want to know if she'd be interested in me, but I don't want to put our friendship in jeopardy. Thanks in advance for any help. Also, if possible, I'd appreciate some concrete advice. When people tell me to "just let her know" or "communicate tactfully" or "flirt" that's a little too vague for me. I am looking for someone to tell me, "Do this, this, and then that." Again, thanks for any and all replies to this post.