I am 42 year old mother of 2 kids 21 yr and 12 yr (still at home) I have been with my husband for 26 years We have had many problems and separated when my oldest was 7 We did not receive counseling and just got back together 1 month later I chalked it up to mid life crisis he was 30 she was 18. In the past 14 years I learned to trust him again and never even imagined that he would cheat. There have been many problems in my life and I have had to deal with the death of my sister, nephew to suicide and my father to cancer. We sort of lost our ability to communicate and he did not know how to handle it so he began to drink more. I haven't been really happy for a long time (admitting this since the breakup in denial prior to the breakup) I just figured we were going thru a rough time and everything would fix itself!!!! Anyway New Years Eve at 10:30 pm home alone relatives had cxxl party plans with us and I was telling my husband the exciting New Years plans I had for next year (dinner out and dancing etc) He looked at me and said I won't be here I have found someone else and I am leaving you I have not loved you for 2 years and you knew!!!! I felt like I had been stabbed. I had no clue he had stayed out a few times with the (guys---too drunk to drive home) I believed him and never ever thought he would run around again. I never begged him to stay but I cried asked why and how he could live here not loving me and making plans for the future he said he was trying to make it work and she was not the reason for breaking up
He left the next day at noon our kids were not here and I was lost so I drove to my moms When I came home a few hours later there was a message from my sister in law and we tried to figure out who the new woman was I went to investigate and found his vehicle I came back home and called her back to tell her and she informed me that my daughter had called her looking for me and had already went to the new womans house, freaked out , punched the woman tore a strip off of her father and was at home. So much has happened in the last couple of days and I am very confused. My husband came here on Saturday and said it was a mistake he loves me and wants to work things out He knows it will take time, I dont know if i can forgive him or ever trust him again or even if I want him again How can someone say mean hurtful things and 3 days later try to take it all back???? Is he doing this because of the kids reaction(realized how much they cared or because she dumped him until he deals with his kids or just wants back in the comfort zone of familiarity I am very confused I don't know if I even want him back and should I do it for the kids sake?????
It felt really good to type this out and get it off my chest I need help and feedback please
Thanks
Allie
