Moriarty

I have a positive myspace story. I found my ex’s new girlfriend’s myspace page, put a face to the evil &%@$ that stole my man and MOVED ON! I saw her relationship status in black and white, was sad for a little bit but finally attained some closure. I realize my boyfriend breaking up with me was not her fault but I was still upset. Seeing her myspace page made her human to me. I think it sped up the healing process. And it let me walk out of the house without looking at every woman I came accross and thinking, “Is THAT her?”

Sorry for the additional post but I want to refine my point. If we had no ties to each other, then I wouldn’t care what he did or with whom. But he wants to be friends. Doesn’t that somehow change the equation? Of course, I want him to be happy but he literally started dating this new person within a day or two! And I don’t doubt the fact that he was ready for dating again but doesn’t he owe it to the ‘new friendship’ he wants to start with me to at least let me regain my consciousness? After all, friends are supposed to be considerate of each other. For the most part I’m a rational, understanding person and I want him to date. Yet this is pushing my limits; his actions seem nothing but selfish to me. On the other hand, he is a really great guy. I don’t see us getting back together because, besides being in love with each other, we were complete opposites. But I sincerely want to be his friend. This is my dilemma.

Yeah, I realize I'm crushing on someone else but that’s really just a coping mechanism. I want to get my life together too. But I'm still in pain about our breakup everyday. And I'm not necessarily upset with him for finding someone else, it’s just the timing!

My boyfriend of four years broke up with me a month ago. We were each other’s first loves and this has been really difficult for me. I wouldn’t say the breakup was mutual but it probably is the best thing for both of us. But he wants to still be friends and, after I heal, I would really like to be his friend too. The problem is that I recently found out that he is seeing someone else. What makes this impossibly painful for me is that he started seeing that someone IMMEDIATELY after he broke up with me. I’m sure they were already talking and flirting for a while but he didn’t even let the dust setting on our relationship! In fact, he had left me with the impression that we would take it slow and possibly get back together after he took some time for himself. I know I’m still hurting from the breakup and I don’t want this to cloud my judgment. Yet I really feel disrespected! He didn’t think I would ever find out and I asked him about this repeatedly and he always denied having met someone (I found out on my own). His reason for the breakup was that he was “changing.” It almost seems like he was just keeping me on the backburner in case his new relationship fell through. And despite his intentions, if you ask me, after four years he should have at least waited a week or two. He hadn’t even returned my things! Are my expectations of proper breakup etiquette wrong? If you were in my position, would you still be his friend? Thanks!

Thanks for your guys' replies. I hope no one misunderstood but I definitely have no intention of making any type of move while I'm in his class. I see the "conflict of interest" and that's why I stressed the fact that I'm waiting until I graduate. But I just want to talk to him to see if he's friendly. I thought maybe I could ask him about his dissertation or something? And I thought asking him out by email was weird and only a last resort. I was going to pick up the final exam after it was graded and do it then. Good idea or not?

Hi everyone. I'm new here but I need some advice. I'm a college senior and I have a crush on the grad student that teaches one of my classes. I consider myself shy but try not to let that stop me. The problem is that he is also shy and is really quiet. He doesn't talk with anyone before class and the only interaction he has with us is answering questions. I want to ask him out at the end of the semester but I need to talk to him before then. I have no idea how to approach him, what to say, etc. Also, he's very professional and I'm worried that he won't want to date a student. So I also have to let him know that I'm graduating. How do I go about this? Also, when I do approach him, how will I know whether he is interested? Thanks so much!