CourtneyDawn

All of your posts have been great and very helpful, although, my fiancee has decided its best for him that I go ahead and move back home with my sister. We talked alot about it, we never got mad or fought about it, and Im staying here until Thursday and so far he has been very sweet to me and helping me through this. He holds me when I cry and trys to cheer me up with silly things or suggests that I take a walk or keep myself busy. We are still really good friends, and we still love each other very much. He told me to call him whenever I need to as he will probably be calling me when he gets upset, and he will be coming down to see my daughter when she's born. Im so glad it isnt all fighting and me just leaving but sometimes I think it would be easier because right now, I dont want to leave at all. I can see myself going to my sisters and just crying and saying over and over again that I just want to go home. Back to my sweet fiancee. If i were mad at him, I wouldnt want to come back. But then I think, it wont be as hard, because I can always call him when Im having a bad day and I know I will see him again sometime. I also know that he still loves me and he's not mad at me about anything. Another thing that Ive been slowly realizing and not sure what to think about it, is that he wont be in the delivery room with me when I have my daughter. For the longest time, when I thought about my delivery I thought of him beside me kissing my forehead, feeding me ice chips, holding the vomit bucket, and all that gross stuff in between. The truth is, when Im sick, he always makes me feel a little better. And now, when Im about to go through the worst pain in my life, he wont be next to me crying with me when she gets put in my arms. I was never really scared of delivery until now. I just scared in general of my future. I dont know whats next, all i know is I wont have him.

My Fiancee is scared about the complications that we will be having soon...and I guess I cant blame him...but Im so scared he will leave me and Im not sure I could handle that. I am in my 7th month of pregnancy and this baby isnt his. (He knows this of course!) We are young, I am 18 and he is 19. We were together from the time I was 15 til last May, we lived together until then, then we broke up for six months, during this time I became pregnant by another man, he turned out to be a loser and in my 3rd month of pregnancy me and my fiancee got back together and he said he wanted to be considered the father of my child and proposed to me a couple of months after we got back together. We love each other very much and he has been helping me through pretty much everything. We are renting a house (instead of this small apartment) together next month and are both excited about that. He has talked to my tummy saying just the cutest things, and worries about both of us just as if this were his biological child. But now, something has happened. Last week we were lying in bed and he told me that he was scared that this was not the right decision for him and his future. He is scared about the money, and his freedom and the fact that he is only 19 years old. Also lately he has been quite distant. He doesnt really want to have sex with me, (it used to be like almost twice a day and now its closer to once a week) not that he cant or anything he just chooses to masturbate instead of turn over and make love to his fiancee. So now he is telling me that he will be making a decision as to wether this is right for him. He says he is still madly in love with me but wants to do whats right for him. Sometimes I think, "well if he;s madly in love with me he would want to work through the hard times and not even consider leaving me" but then I have to think about it on his side, he is only 19, and he has his whole life ahead of him, should he really juggle being a husband and father whilst just starting his career, even though this child isnt even his to begin with and am I being selfish to want him to be with me? Everything seems so complicated but Im so scared because I really dont think I could do this without him. He is seriously like my rock and my hero and I love him more than anything and would be devistated if he left. Can anyone help me with this?