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NSY991

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  1. Coollady we have been "dating" for just over six months, but we see each other infrequesntly mostly because he travels for work. We had a big fight two weeks ago, right before my father passed away suddenly, and though he has been supportive about that, he said he is not ready to talk because of the fight we had....and he wants to "think about" what direction he's heading in. His last contact was Friday evening.
  2. I agree Batya...and am trying maintain my distance. Great advice. Thanks so much.
  3. That's what I was thinking , and to be honest , me being able to NOT do anything makes me feel stronger. I guess my only fear is that he will decide he doesn't want to continue pursuing things, but I know I have no control over that.
  4. If someone you are dating says they need some time apart or to "think" what is an approriate time frame to give them? A few weeks? A week? THe guy I have been dating has pulled away and even said in his last email" Rest assured I think of you often and still most certainly have hopes for us, that's important for you to know". The following night I received an email with him saying he hoped I was feeling better. (My father passed away almost two weeks ago) Nothing since, and though I have done nothing (as in contact him) I am a little hurt I haven't heard from him yet. Especially with V-day tomorrow. Am I being unreasoanble or impatient? Any thoughts on what I should or should not do? Thx
  5. Hi Mease. Not sure if I'll be of any help really. I am going to attempt some NC whith the guy I've been dating. Dating : Just over six months We haven't really "broken up"...I am just feeling taken for granted and need some distance from the situation for now. I am starting today. Last contact was from him Friday night saying he hoped I was doing better. (my father passed away about 10 days ago) but he doesn;t want to talk right now because of a fight we had right before that.So I'm giving him "space". Good luck with your situation.
  6. I will try to be out of the house on V-day. I will try to only post if I hear from him, otherwise I will try to just remain strong.
  7. I know Annie, it's sad.I am have been crying all night trying to make this decision and it's not easy at all. Valentines day is going to be REALLY hard, and I hate to admit but it will be even harder if I DON'T hear from him at all, but I am hoping that will make it easier too. I know I will get through it, it will just take time. Thanks for letting me vent and I will keep you posted.
  8. I will be seeing a grief counselor about that. Yes, this makes it extra hard, but then I tell myself mabe I am putting a heavy burden on him by expecting him to go through this with me.We aren't married, and he lost his own father to a heart attack, so maybe it brings a lot of bad stuff back up for him too. Just trying to see things from his POV and not my own grief stricken one. I don't think I want to discuss this with him either.I am not good at these conversations.I tend to withdraw. We have rarely gone more than a couple days without talking but I have to do this for now. I really hope it's ok for me to post during this time, as I am sure I will need it, especially if he contacts me.
  9. I have taken this next week off for obvious reasons.Maybe this week would be a good time to begin this withdrawal.I know this is going to be one of the hardest things I have ever done.I feel like not only one special person has died in my life, but another one as well. I need strength.
  10. Thanks Annie.I guess the hard part is that he hasn't really done anything "wrong". I could place blame but there really isn't any. There was so much potential for us and I don't want to throw away a great thing, but at the same time I know me just accepting the situation as it is, is only going to frustrate me, and he will likely continue as things have been. It makes me sad that him not having me in his life anymore might not even make a difference. I'm also not sure if I'm strong enough to NOT contact him if he contacts me.It's so hard.
  11. I am trying to decide to let go of the guy I have been dating.It is much harder than I ever thought it would be because I have formed an emotional attachment to him.We didn't see each other often because of his traveling and my schedule but we have managed to remain in almost daily contact for a half a year. My dilemma is I want more in terms of a relationship, and things are not progressing. I feel like he is getting the benefits of an 'emotional" relationship without putting forth any real energy.It is hurtful and frustrating. I don't know HOW to even begin this. Not talking to him is going to tear me apart. In addition I am grieving the loss of my father. I need someone to be here for me, and he just isn't and this is something I simply can't handle. I just need strength to end it somehow.I know it is going to be hard, but I need to do it. How do you let go of someone ??
  12. The guy I have been "seeing" sent me a short email today...after telling me last night he wasn't ready to "talk" to me,....because of some negativity last week.You all can find my previous posts....His email was short...."Hey, hope you're having a better day today. Just thinking of you. be happy!!!' My father had a heart attack and passed away last week. last night I REALLY needed someone to talk to..and he said he couldn't..and truthfully right now I am a bit pissed...and hurt, because regardless of what happened last week, I would be there for HIM no matter what. So.....should I even BOTHER replying or wait till I am LESS upset?
  13. Congrats BTR!!!! My birthday is today.........so he came close to sharing a birthday with me I wish you and Benjamin a life of happiness!!!
  14. Thank you Beec that really means a lot.......I really appreciate it.
  15. I admit, I DID become emotional with him. Yes it was a VERY selfish act. I really am NOT like that ona day to day basis. As I said, it had sort of come to a boiling point. I have said I'm sorry and I really am. I have also expressed my gratitude for him being there in this hard time...however he has said he is unable to talk to me right now, which...while hurtful..I understand, and need to respect that. Scout: Thank you for the input. I agree I should seek support outside of this relationship. Maybe we will come back together, but I suppose that shouldn't be my concern at this point in time. I will focus on myself and my grief for the time being.
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