I think, that when two people are in a relationship, that they should be focused on making the other person feel good.
Right or wrong?
When someone communicates their needs, the other person should try to meet those needs.
Right or wrong?
Please answer those two first, then consider the following.
When I'm sick or not feeling well, he gets mad that I am not being nice to him. I don't mistreat him. I'm just less responsive.
In a healthy relationship, shouldn't he be trying to make me feel better instead of making the issue about him?
It's frustrating to me - because that's when I need him to help me and be there for me. Instead, I feel like I'm being attacked when I need help. The entire conversation is always about me not being as attentive as I should be. So, I already feel bad because I'm sick, then I have to defend feeling bad. Then, I'm a little angry that I'm the one who was sick and needed help, and then it somehow becomes all about him.
I've communicated that several times. It always ends up in a fight that was my fault for bringing the issue up.
I've said "I want to do everything you want, and give you everything you need." "I want to be treated well in return." We still wind up a few paragraphs above.
What do you make of that?
Also, I come from two happily married parents. He comes from a single parent home with a bad relationship with his mother. Does that make a difference?
Advice? I want it to work.
