Jump to content


  • Content Count

  • Joined

Everything posted by redpoppy99

  1. Sure he did half the making but who's going through the entire ordeal? Not the father. He shouldn't be an influence especially if he is not taking responsibility. That doesn't sound like a good father to me. There's a phrase that I myself use for my real father- SPERM DONOR!!!
  2. This may come off badly but it's my opinion: You made your decisions and followed them through. Now is time to deal with the consequences. There is medicaid for to-be mothers who can't afford health insurance... There are clinics, too. There is SO much out there to help someone in your situation. If you don't want to keep the baby, there are couples out there who have dreamed for a long time for a child. Why not make their dream come true? Terminating a pregnancy is a selfish act... and the consequences of that are with you for the rest of your life. Everytime the guessed birth date
  3. My SO and I are happy now. I am not going to ruin it by bringing up the past. Even though I never confirmed it, my SO does know about what happened- rumors spread fast. I don't think telling my SO now would solve anything- we've moved past it, gotten over it and we are back on track. I understand where you are coming from- however, this was a mistake. The definition of a mistake is: An error or fault resulting from defective judgment, deficient knowledge, or carelessness. Yes, some mistakes are accidental but some aren't. Don't be so sure you know what was going through my head as I mad
  4. What is it that she does to make you angry? Sometimes the things people do are intended to make someone that angry. My SO will do and say things that make me SOOO mad and I completely lose my temper but that's what my SO is going for. I do the same, I won't lie, and we are aware of this problem. We know we need to find a way to solve our arguments that won't involve screaming and crying. We are both in our early twenties, also, and I think that is part of it. I suggest talking about a better way to work out your arguments while you are both calm and not in the middle of a dispute. And i
  5. Perhaps people should not jump into marriage and go in "blinded" as you say. People do not take marriage seriously and don't seem to understand the contract part of marriage. There is a lack of responsiblity and ethics today and everyone expects marriage to be like a fairytale romance. Divorce is very ugly and it can ruin people, not only financially, but emotionally. And what about children who are involved? Perhaps that's why people jump into marriage now-a-days... They are so desperately looking for the love they missed out on during childhood when their parents were getting divorced.
  6. I agree with the previous two posts. It's easy to feel stuck in a LDR. You commit to your girlfriend, call her everyday and stay faithful but you get very little reward for it. Sure, she does the same but you don't get to see her very often and do things that couples who see each other everyday get to do. If you were able to see her everyday, do you think you would still be feeling this way? Look at it like this, even though you feel like being single would be "easier," you have not lost feelings for this girl. Try figuring out ways to keep the bond strong. Send each other little present
  7. There is a HUGE difference between her spending a weekend with a male friend and you spending time or just talking to your sister. IMHO, I think emotional cheating is when you FEEL something for someone you should only feel for your SO. That's obviously not going to happen with your sister so the answer is no, you did not cheat in any way by talking to your sister. Everyone needs someone to vent to sometimes. Anyone else's wife would be grateful it was a family member of the opposite sex and not a coworker or friend.
  8. Yes it hurts me, too, to hate her. We have mutual friends and it makes it harder. She has known these people longer so I feel they are loyal to her and it affects my friendship with them. Part of me feels like I should just be her friend but part of me feels that would be against what I think. When we do hang out, she talks about it and I do not know what to say. I feel like she is pushing me, seeing how far she can go or perhaps she says it to see if I will say I've forgiven her. I am a stubborn person and I rarely disregard my beliefs for anything. I still care for her well-being but
  9. Here is an update: I decided NOT to tell my SO about the kiss because they have moved past it. My SO trusts me to go out with friends again and I trust myself not to do anything like that again-it has almost been a year since the incident. I am working on some of my personal issues and I think that will greatly improve our relationship. I am 100% positive that there will be no infidelity EVER again on my part and I am very confident it won't happen with my SO. I am working on building a stronger bond with my SO and we are working on building a solid future together. I have learned from
  10. I need to spend more quality time with my SO but I don't know what to do! Anyone have any ideas for bonding with someone when you are already in a seriously committed relationship? I want some alone time where we can talk but also have some fun. When we sit at home, we usually end up doing our own thing- one of us watching tv, the other on the computer or whatever. We live in a town where there isn't much to do (no mall, no activity centers like laser tag or bowling...)PLEASE HELP!!!!!
  11. Have you considered or tried temporarily going on medication?
  12. I know it hurts! I can empathize. I have been through similar. It is so hard when so much falls on you at once but don't give up!!! Life is full of downs like these!!! But it is also so full of wonderful highs!!!!!! Perhaps you should consider seeing a school counselor- when I was in college and my high school sweetheart (of three years) and I broke up, I was just as devestated. It is sometimes not beneficial to talk to peers. Many don't understand. I went to a counselor and it really helps just to have someone listen and not judge and counselors are perfect for this! Also, surround
  13. A girl I was very good friend's with had an abortion (over a year ago). It is something I do not agree with but I tried to help her, I tried not to judge. I was there for her home pregnancy test, I took a day off work to go to the doctor's with her... I also tried to persuade her not to do it- she was already 5 months pregnant. I told her she could live with me for free, I told her I would do anything and I would have. I tried to talk her into putting her baby up for adoption instead. I know she was torn (she and her b/f were on the verge of breaking up before they found out about the pre
  14. I have thought of this possibility but it pains me more to think WE were the reason he did it. I don't understand, if this was the reason, why he didn't try to contact us.. why did he just disappear? We never wanted him out of our lives and maybe we didn't communicate that but I don't remember ever making it seem like that. I do ask why and I wish someone could tell me. I have looked and looked for his obituary, for anything hoping to get more insight. I don't even know how it happened... and maybe I don't want to. I wish I knew who he was involved with- family, friends, or whoever- bef
  15. Sex is a way of giving yourself up intimately to someone. It's meant to be a loving act, especially when you agree to commit to someone. In some ways, it's allowing someone to become a part of you, to touch your soul. And by agreeing to be in a committed relationship, you are giving up your right to do such a thing. That is why it is so wrong.
  16. Hello all- I pretty much just need to get this out and I don't feel I can dicuss this with anyone else so this seems like a good place to go. When I was in about 3rd/4th grade (I don't exactly remember a whole lot from that time in my life) my parents divorced and it was nasty. Both trash talking each other, my father trashing my mother's new boyfriend... the worst part of it was that my brothers and I had to choose who to live with. My father was, unfortunately, not the best. He got to the point where he beat my brothers and I and that made us want to go live with our mom. None of us
  17. I am just not sure they would accept it and be willing to move past it with me. I am afraid my SO would rather move past it on their own. I am not sure my SO would realize how regretful I am for it and I guess I don't really know how to make them see that I am. My SO tends to disregard things I say as just words... and I guess I don't blame them but that is a big issue for me.
  18. After reading everyone's response, I guess I should add a little more. I never lost feelings for my SO, I just felt neglected- like I was not a priority. I know that what happened is due to my own personal problems and nothing else but that is not my problem here. I am fully aware of what my faults are and that I need to work on them- what I am dealing with and need advice on is this guilt I am feeling. Will it truly ruin our relationship the way everyone says it will? My SO is everything to me- the one I want to be with for the rest of my life. I do not want to lose them. All I want to
  19. Hello all. I am new here and this is the reason I joined. I made a mistake. I cheated. It was once and the only thing that happened was kissing but it is still cheating because I liked it and I wanted it and I had feelings for this person. I didn't feel guilty for a while because I got very good at the whole denial thing... but I saw this person recently and I hung out with them (not alone and nothing happened) but it made me remember what I did. Now I feel horrible. So completely guilty. I realize what a huge mistake I made and I will NEVER do it again. My significant other knows but
  • Create New...