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most of all, the drowning keeps repeating in my mind. i dont imagine ever getting over it.

it is now nearly 8 months (in 3 days to the day) since Ndali passed. i miss her the same. i miss her yowls, her dancing, her showdog walk, her smell, her muscular yet tiny body, her pooping while walking (she never squatted), and most of all, her exuberance. where will i find that all again. i have still not been able to accept it. i keep hoping to see her again, to have her speak to me. to see her out my window... if not see her soul in another dog, then in a bird, a lizard, anything. she was my angel in a fur dog body. link removed

thank you for the story. i dont know if i believe it, but it feels better. i miss her so, this feeling does not end.

I recently lost my dear fur child to a drowning. i was not looking, i was not listening, i was eating, while adjacent to us, only 15 feet away, she must have slipped into my aunts pool during thanksgiving dinner. i should have been more careful. i was watching the older of my two dogs. french bulldogs cannot swim, i know that, yet i forgot to be worried, and while eating a turkey carcass (which i cannot eat again), she died, and i wasnt even there to help her. we found her minutes later, at bottom of pool. cpr, resuscitatation, drive to vet. nothing brought her back. i wish she would come to me in a dream, i wish i could speak to her. how can i say goodbye to her? do ii have to? will she come back to me somehow, i call her everyday. it's been 37 days. i still feel so forlorn. if it werent for my living dear dog and my husband, i would have chosen to drown too. i miss her so...

i had a similar experience. on thanksgiving my precious Ndali, a french bulldog, must have slipped into my aunts pool where we were visiting having dinner. i cannot forgive myself. it's been 37 days. i am still guilt ridden. i am waiting for her to come back to me in my dreams, a mirage of her to sit next to the sunlight florida room she used to sunbathe, i am trying to learn to meditate to be able to communicate with her. i just dont know if i believe in an afterlife or, more likely for me to believe-- reincarnation. i just dont know. why hasnt she come to me then? i need her so. i need to say goodbye, sorry that i let her in that deathly patio with the deadly pool area while i gobbled up turkey carcass. i felt guilty not having her and my other frenchie underfoot the whole time, but felt it was innappropriate to keep them next to me when the other guest's dogs had to stay on the patio. oh god, what a mistake i made, in not being more careful. i do hope both of us, and others undoubtedly, can forgive ourselves for the death of our dogs. i dont know what to do to get over it. i just want her back so badly, to touch her soft fur, hear her cute crying sounds, hear her snoring, and see her pounce on our other frenchie. i want her alive again.