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Benson

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Everything posted by Benson

  1. Benson
    also another tip, if youre trying to put weight on, u should be intaking protein equal to your weight in grams per day (ie 150 lbs = 150g protein) you should always have protein in your system if you workout alot
  2. Benson
    I wont. Im going to tell her I dont have them anymore, and to have a nice life. I can see if i was an {mod edit}, then fine.. I'd meet her, but when I did everything I could, still she couldnt give me common courtesy.. this chapter is closed, no pictures for her, nor am i going to reply to her.
  3. Benson
    well she didnt have enough backbone to call me... but i already knew that.. she might call me in a few days but im certainly not going to wait for her call... hilarious, her status message on msn is ' {mod editing}ing {mod edit!}!!!!' hahahah i love it... even though I dont quite know what I did.. LOL
  4. Benson
    thanks for the many replies you guys are great. certainly alot to think of.. I was considering just mailing the stuff back to her.. But it would also be nice to let her have it cause I never got the chance... thanks again guys, I think if she calls im not gonna pick it up.... or... lol
  5. Benson
    but what i wanna know is, why did she message me at 5:30 am, right when she gets up.... doesnt make sense.. "I've just gotten up for work, and I've decided I want my pictures back! im gonna text him!" lol
  6. Benson
    bah well i already texted her saying that if she wants them to call me.... other than that i havent been rude/nice at this point, i would send them back to her without a fuss, but she doesnt deserve that..
  7. Benson
    really? even after what she did to me?? you wouldnt meet up and let her hear what you couldnt think of at the time to say?? ive been waiting to tell her this mod edit for a long time she values silence too much. its time to let her see the real world besides, who gets up at 530, getting ready for work and texes their ex of almost 3 months saying she wants her pics back... llol
  8. Benson
    well they are of her childhood and stuff.. but they werent that important, ive had them for a year lol even when i was with her i had them but her message was very cold, "i want my pictures back" I want to tell her what a selfish person she was and that I had earned more with her than to be let go at the drop of a hat, i want to tell her that i was Mod editing devastated cause she couldnt even give the decency of giving me a reason, or talking it out with me when every time ive had a problem with her I always talked it out with her, you know... i NEED to say thesse things.
  9. Benson
    For those of you that have been following my story here, I had a bad breakup with my ex, she left me for no reason, or atleast I didnt get any closure.. She messaged me yesterday and told me that she wanted her pictures back. There are so many things I want to say to her, and im just looking for some advice.. Im not looking to get back with her, but I want to be angry at her, is this right? I want to say what I couldnt think to say when it happened because I was too traumatized, is this a good idea? this would be when we meet face to face I texted her back twice and said if you want them, you call me, dont message me on my phone again...
  10. Benson
    I second that. It was the best thing to ever happen to me. And I know everyone is different but the ONLY thing that will get you over someone is yourself. You have to CONSTANTLY try to get over it. It takes a long time for some people, and you have to have a decent amount of will power.... One day you will realize that what you lost wasnt worth it. Now dont get me wrong, I think of her from time to time but thats completely normal. You dont spend a span of time with someone and just magically forget it... Its normal... Its also normal to have some ups and downs but for the most part you should do yourselves a favor and try your hardest to get on with your lives!
  11. Benson
    Hey guys and ladies. For those people out there that are hurting, wondering, pleading, crying.... It really does get better. For me it took two months, for some it may take more, but trust me, it does get alot better. The past two months were dark as hell for me, all I could think about was what went wrong and how I didnt fix it. Let me tell you, the more you 'what if' about things, only drives the hurt... I was even slightly suicidal.. I am doing alot better now, because I listened to all of the advice that this forum has to offer. No contact has helped me a great deal and I hardly think about my ex anymore. The most difficult part about healing is that you're constantly thinking about how you cant live without your ex or that you've done something wrong , etc.. Just let it go and get on with your life. Its harder than it sounds but it has to be done. What really worked for me is just even talking to other women, not even neccesarily dating them, it gives alot of confidence.. So try to atleast get out there, and realize that you're doing things for yourself now, and not for someone else. I am not ready to date again, but I will be soon, and im amazed at how far i've come from this.. Like most of you I didnt think it was ever going to happen, but it does. Another thing that amazes me is that I realize im much much more of a stronger person this time around, I cant believe how much stronger I feel after all of this... So please everyone thats hurt, take time for yourself, it really works. Your mind will stop racing eventually and nothing but time will help you. There are no tricks or anything else you can do. Best wishes, benson
  12. Benson
    thanks joe. I needed that. My biggest mistake was letting myself get into this long of a relationship with someone that I knew couldnt commit emotionally.. Its weird isnt it? I mean, when you know why a breakup happened and you know you really didnt have much to do with it, yet you still feel so hurt inside it makes you want to throw up.... The absolute best thing I can do for myself is move on and find someone with some emotional stability, however it seems so dark and extremely hard right now to do so. I guess I have to wait until im ready, which, I hope will be sooner than later.
  13. Benson
    good for you sjv. well done. keep up the NC.
  14. Benson
    I think more than anything she needs help, and not just your help either.. professional help.. It may very well be in your best interest to forget this woman... I wouldnt have anything to do with her. You deserve someone that will take YOUR thoughts into consideration and not theirs all the time. Not to mention the irrational behaviour she's showing.....
  15. Benson
    yeah, but it wont work hun.. i swear it. I just did that, and it didnt work.. lol.. my only closure would be screaming at her haha .. dont do it!!! keep NC.... believe me it WILL hurt even tho u dont think it will.
  16. Benson
    sjv... I sent something like that last week.... although it didnt cause me much pain because I didnt get a reply, I knew it wasnt the best thing to do.... im in a world of doubt, probably as you are.. but please dont send it.
  17. Benson
    Why is it that I feel guilty about my ex breaking up with me, even though clearly I didnt do anything directly to her that would make her leave?? I want to get mad at her but I just cant seem to do it.... Even though I know she had self esteem issues and various communication issues.... it feels like im responsible for everything thats happened... After a few months of trying to make it work for us both and explaining to her what I needed, and what we had to do to make it work, as always she never did anything for US, and yet I Still feel bad about what happened... I tried so hard to make it work, maybe she took it the wrong way, as in I was putting pressure on her or something and she couldnt take it, but is that my fault??... Im not even physically attracted to my ex anymore and I dont even want her back, I couldnt imagine even touching her again after leaving me without an explanation, yet I still feel bad about what happened.. Is there something wrong with me?
  18. Benson
    I needed this post when I read it last night. thanks. Very inspirational.
  19. Benson
    To be quite honest, I would do it all over again and listen to my instincts instead of my heart and gotten rid of her and not have wasted the last 8 months of the relationship.
  20. Benson
    hey meantime, you know what the worst of it is?? its not just being sad you know, about someone you loved that left you.. other people besides me notice im sad, and im not the same person I was when I was dating her.. It makes me sad that I cant make as many people laugh as I could before, and it makes other people wonder what the hell is wrong with me... and in turn, me asking myself that very same question, which is the reason for this thread.. ah.. vicious cycle. so far, ive had no ill advice from anyone on here, it is very comforting to know other people feel the way I do, each and every day. this site has kept me going thru some of the worst times when i wanted to call her.. but youre right, when it comes down to it, im on my own..
  21. Benson
    Thanks again everyone. Ive maintained NC for the most part, slipped once and sent her a happy new year email.. I just looked onto her hi5 profile and she deleted everything.... this hurts reallllly bad
  22. Benson
    Yeah. I guess two years is a long time to spend with someone. Forgetting them might take almost as long... Especially when I tried so hard to make it work.. thank you
  23. Benson
    thanks. i was beginning to think I was obsessed.... theres a million reasons why im thinking 'bout her all the time. and theyre all probably normal.... i just wish it would stop...... thank you.
  24. Benson
    Hello all. I'd like to take this oppertunity to thank each and everyone of you for your support and kind words... I have but one question to ask.. Is it normal to think about your ex even if its been two months after a break up?? All I seem to do is think about her, every day, all day... I've barely broken NC even though its killing me... Im wondering if its because I didnt get a real reason why she broke it off.. Im just very confused, trying to heal... any input would be greatly appreciated, thank you.
  25. Benson
    wow sleex.... I had the same problem. Unfortunately for me it didnt end the way I wanted it to. I always asked my ex to call me more often and try to express her love for me, be more open to me.... What I should have realized (maybe I did but I was too naieve to break it off) was that she wasnt the one for me, because she didnt meet my needs/wants.. You should look at it that way... Dont expect someone to change who they are for you, you should have someone that doesnt need to change to keep you happy.. just my $0.02
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