nins2

i do leave my phone with my friend but that doesnt stop me from using someone else's phone to call him lol i just need to make sure i control my drinking

ok i have a big problem. me and my ex have been broken up for 2 months now. i broke up with him and he tried soooo hard to get me back and i just kept saying no. there was too to many problems we couldnt deal with and trust issues on both parts. So i decided to visit my friend in new york for the holidays to get away from everything. obviously we have been going out to clubs and parties and all that since everyone's on holidays. the problem is i have called him 4 times in the past week. its almost as if i feel the need to talk to him everytime i drink!!!! otherwise, im fine like i dont wanna talk to him when im sober because i know its over. i dont understand why i cant just go out and have a good time in an amazing city without feeling the need to call him. worst part is that i called him last night at 3 am and i had a 16 minute conversation with him and i dont even remember what i said!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP ME IM SUPPOSED TO BE GETTING AWAY FROM MY LIFE being with HIM. im ON VACATION!!!! how can i solve this problem?!?!?!?! should i stop drinking? how can i stop my self from calling him when im out?

i did it because i cared of coarse. its in our nature as women to take care of men. especially me, i like being dominant but i didnt like it when he started putting everything on me. he was needy in other ways too..didnt like being alone at home etc.

Ok so me and my boyfriend (he was my first real love this i am sure of) just broke up over a month ago. I am doing pretty well...im usually pretty optomistic so ive just basically been doing my usual everyday things. I broke up with him because i felt really trapped...like he relied on me way too much. He always wanted to be together which showed me he wasnt very independent and he lacked confidence in many ways. I had to find him an apartment, i did his taxes for him, i got him a job and so on. He relied on me too much and i didnt have much space to persue other things on my own. I go to university and he didnt understand how much i actually needed to study. I just i dont know i felt trapped as i say...i wasnt sure if this is what i wanted from a relationship. I told him i still loved him and broke up with him. he was devestated like really angry, upset, all those different emotions. I told him it would be easier if we stopped all contact. So we did; he respected my decision. However, i got a call from him last night (after a month and half now) and he said he was at a friend's wedding. He told me he got a heavy duty mechanics job that pays well and so on. Im confused...he seemed so different like confident and everything and he was doing all these things on his own now. Can people just change like that? Or was he just saying those things to impress me? I do still love him very much and a part of me wants to go back now because he seems to be doing well on him own. But im scared he'll go back to being needy and clingy and relying on me too much again. DId he learn??!?!? Should i go back?????? I know he loves me.....i love him too

Humans like him are proof that evil exists

I have one pointer you can consider. I just broke up with my ex because he was too clingy, too attached, and depended on me for everything. He wasn't independent or secure with himself and his future. This drove me away. I felt bad when i broke up with him because i knew he was very attached but he was just too much. An emotionally healthy individual likes to be with someone that is independent and doesn't necessarily NEED someone else...just simply wants someone else. I seems to me like you needed him and people dont like this. You have to build yourself bu yourself and not rely on others..especially a boyfriend.

OH MAN i just broke up with my ex and if i ever saw him with another girl id cry infront of him not at home. u sure are strong. Feelings do disappear..it just takes time. time heals everything..just tell urself that and it will take ur mind off it. good luck!

So here I am doing nothing. All I can think about is my ex boyfriend. He was the best boyfriend ever and i fell in love with him...until one day he got angry and hurt me physically. I left him right away, i didnt even think twice. He called me and apologized and said he was sorry and i told him it was over and not to call me anymore. I said i would never feel the same. He kept trying to get me back and all but i just kept my word: ITS OVER. He stopped calling...and now im like what the hell why did he stop calling? He's giving up that easily? Has he already moved on? All week i have been wondering what he's doing, thinking about him all the time. I miss him alot. I know I can't be with him and It won't work but I cant stop thinking about him. The worst part is that one the weekend I called him....he never called back. It seems that every time I drink I want to call him. I think about him more when im out having a drink and i get upset when im supposed to be having fun. What can do to stop this? How can i get over him? Oh and dont worry i have not forgotten that he hit me but feelings dont just disappear when someone hurts u.....HELP!!!!!!!!!!

PLEASE DONT MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE I DID. the same thing happened to me...he punched me because i said something that pissed him off. i called the cops and had him arrested. i also felt guilty afterwards and when he apologized i took him back. everything was good for 2 months. then, one day i hung the phone up on him and when i got home he completely beat me up. i couldnt even leave to get help after...he wouldnt let me. i almost died. do u want the same thing to happen???? RUN FROM HIM DONT WALK.

Yeah i see what ur saying but the thing is that i love hanging out with him and going out with him its so fun and we get along great. Maybe we just shouldnt drink together cuz it will turn into sex or I should learn to say NO even when we're drinking.

ok so me and this guy were dating for 4 months. It was a good relationships....no fights and we got along great. But we were so different. music wise, our morals, ect. Anyways, he broke up with me and said he wanted to be friends...I though that he was just saying that. But we actually are really good friends now. we havent been together for like 9 months but we are always in contact. lately, we started going out partying together and well...we ended up having sex. So every time we go partying with our friends, we end up together after a few drinks. Its basically meaningless sex but still it happens everytime we go out. (it didnt used to). He just called me and told me about a girl he went out with so I told him I met this french guy on the weekend. He seemed to get jealous and akward after I told him?!?! But for some reason he thinks I should be ok with him dating other girls. Its just weird because we're having sex and not dating. But he still calls me alot and belittles guys I meet at the club ect. But he ALWAYS tells me so casually when he meets someone or chats with a girls over the internet. WHAT IS HE THINKING????? like are we just partying and sleep ing together? And if so, why does he get jealous and why does he call me all the time and ask me what Im doing and where Im going?

Yes he did beat me and i feel so worthless now. Not to mention my confidence doenst exist. People always tell me im beautiful, pretty and sexy ect. I get attention from guys. I just feel so about myself because of this relationship. I cant picture a guy treating me right and me thinking its normal. THIS IS MESSED UP. my dad treats me like too and the one normal boyfriend i had (that wasnt abusive emotionally)...i started fights with him. I thought it was weird he didnt WHATS WRONG WITH ME??

I have the same problem. The things my ex said to me still hurt bad. However, he used to insult my weight and looks and now I look way better. He actually has pushed me to look way better (other people have noticed). i weight only 110 pounds now and am working out. his negative words make me want to excel and be the best. Try it out. think about the bad things he said and do positive things with it.

ok so me and this guy have been dating for 9 months now. he was my first love. In the beginning of the relationship he was the perfect guy. I immediately fell for him. About 3 months into the relationship he started getting jealous, then controlling, and soon I found myself not being with anyone else except for him. We never even went out...thats the way he liked it. I didn't make any decisions....everything we did and how we spent our time was up to him. But i loved him so i convinced myself it was normal. Soon the control got really bad. I had to cancel my camping trip with my best friend. I didnt mind that much because i convinced myself that id rather be with him anyway. I loved him and he did treat me well. He cooked for me everyday, gave me messages, everything. But soon the emotional abuse started and the public embarrassment. He started calling me names... like fat ect. I found our fights were basically him putting me down and it worked. I felt worthless..but somehow he always made me feel better after he put me down. and he would pretend like nothing happened and that i was insane for thinking out fight was abnormal. I put up with it and didnt say anything to anyone. He started ruining my personal property and one night when he gave me the silent treatment I decided enough was enough. I went to the bus stop to go back to my parents. He followed me and ended up breaking my nose. I took him back after that because he said he was sorry and it was an accident. It wasnt but I made myself believe it was. He said he wouldnt do it again. One night i hung up the phone on him cuz i was in a bad mood. When i got home he beat me up...he could have killed me that night. I begged him to stop and he finally did. I cried all night...he said he was sorry. The next day i decided enough was enough and went back to my parents and told them everything. I left him with nothing. He called and i hung up. He had no money or anything and i had no pity for him. He lost me forever and he knew it. He went back to his moms. Now he's calling me and saying i gave him a reality check and he is so sorry for everything. he finally for THE FIRST TIME admitted that everything he did was becuase he was insecure with our relationship. he blamed everything on himself and is promosing he will never touch me again. he says that he takes full responsibility for him actions and that i am the love of him life. he seems really sincere. Should I believe him? Can people change if you give them a reality check? I left him with nothing. I do love him and i think about him all day, even though he hurt me emotionally and physically. I know he loves me too but I dont know if i can trust him. HELP