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BadKitten

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  1. I am a woman. I find games annoying and futile. I can be good at them, but what's the point? Unless we are talking about casual dating. I will never go for someone who is co-dependent and has no life - hence is on the phone with me all the time. But at the same time, aloofness/games/playing it cool turns me off. Some of that is needed in the beginning, I guess. But once you are in a relationship - DITCH that crap.
  2. I am not sure exactly how to formulate this question. I guess I’ll try to do my best. I am in a very loving relationship – we get along really well and our communication is also very good. We have also agreed that whatever fears, insecurities, etc. we have, we will share them with each other if we deem necessary (I am not talking about not being able to maintain healthy boundaries). He initiated that policy, and it felt good to follow- it really strengthens what we have, I think. The idea is that ages ago both of us considered this sort of thing a sign of weakness, maybe even instability (especially me, the former Ice Queen) whereas now we’ve come to realize that being able to show these things to your loved one requires a great deal of strength and self-knowledge. Not to mention, it brings us even closer together. So, I have told him things that were hard to admit even to myself (and he has done the same). The immediate result was great. But now I can’t help but wonder if I’ve gone too far. I pride myself on being strong and independent, and sometimes wonder if I’ve shown too much. If my fears may be too “unattractive”. I hope that makes sense. The question is how much is too much? What is your policy of truth? P.S. I struggle with some things from the past between us and would really like to mention them, but then again I am not sure how much is too much.
  3. He wants to find a girl basically. That's what he has shared with me. I think he is great, he just needs some help in that area. I don't know how to tell him these things w/o hurting his feelings.
  4. The issue/question is very complex I know. It's very difficult to organize my thoughts right now, so rather than posting stuff that does not make sense, I'd like to just post a few questions for feedback: 1. Do you have any deal breakers? Say, you're madly in love with them, but they lack ambition or something else that may be important to you? 2. HOw do you reconcile some criteria/decisions which are purely rational with the string emotions you feel toward someone? To sum up, how do you decide if you'd make a good couple for marriage (and love each other, obviously). I am asking this beacuse I've seen so many ppl get married because they were madly in love whole totally ignoring some things that became the reain for the divorce later. I guess, part of the question is, do you have certain criteria (for the lack of a better word), for your potential mate. Given, you love them and all that jazz. Thanks in advance. I hope I make sense.
  5. You are right. I guess since I never had a "type" physically I don't quite get it, that's all. I have characteristics I look for. I also don't like conventional pretty boys. Ooops, I guess I do have a type.
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