Mrs Elliott Smith

Stop trying so hard and relax. Wait a while and see if he comes around. Chances are, if you pull back a bit, he'll come forward a bit. Good luck, and don't stress.

If I were you, I'd wait to tell them when you have about a year left of uni. If you're still a couple of years towards graduating, there's no need to create tension between you and ur parents.

hmm 20 yrs. old and you worked at Wendy's... unless you become a business owner, how could you possibly make any more money than the minimimum wage range without being educated? (I'm sure there are exceptions, but it's not easy.) Do yourself a favor and go back to school. Unless you want to marry a "rich" guy and mooch off of (depend on) him for the rest of your life (which will make you feel trapped). School may not be "for you," but it might help you get the things you want out of life. Sometimes we just gotta suck it up and deal with things that we'd rather not do. That's a part of what it means to be a responsible adult.

1. Don't settle down with 1 person (romantically) until you're in your mid-twenties. 2. Travel. 3. Have a lot of confidence in your academic abilities, and make sure you pursue something that you truly enjoy. (This isn't an issue for me, but it is for so many others.)

What would be the point, though, of going to a "1st world" country for only 2 years, then? Sure, you'll get out from being under your father's control, but is there a guarantee that you'll find a good job once you DO decide to move back home? And the money you make here in those 2 years will not be as much as you might imagine. I'm in the U.S., and it's not easy to live here on your own and support yourself. It's possible, but you might have to live in the ghetto, and/or deal with loads of debt. Regardless, good luck in your endeavor.

Good luck, because it doesn't get any easier as the years go by.

now you know to NEVER let your significant other know what you're insecure about. sometimes it makes them start believing that you're right about your insecurity. for future reference, keep your mouth shut!!!

ever consider that he just might feel too tired for sex sometimes? some people's sex drives are truly affected by their levels of tiredness.

Sorry to say, but men and women will always find other people to be attractive. You're not the only attractive woman out there, and I'm sure you know that Bruce isn't the only hot man out there. Looking at other people (in public) is natural, and it's something you're going to have to live with, because it's not something you can stop him from doing. And plus, the more you try to stop him, the more he'll WANT to look at other women. However, if he "stares" or "gapes" way too long at other women, then yes, it is VERY disrespectful to you. As for the porn... It IS messed up that he LIED to you about it. But is it really messed up that he looks at it? I don't know if you realize this, but more people look at porn than you think. When he becomes obsessed with it, though, then you have a problem. I don't want to tell you how you are, but it seems that you're insecure. You need to work on yourself first, and try to be above all of this junk. It's human nature to want to look. It's just how we were created. And the best piece of advice I can give you is this: The more you try to prevent him from looking at porn, and the more you nag him, the more he'll want to look at porn. People want what they "can't" have, and also, you will be a huge turnoff to him if you act like a jealous school girl.

I agree with everyone on the clit stimulation. That'll work. But... you can't stress out over this. The more you stress, the less likely you are to not only enjoy it, but to come. When you're with him next time, just take a deep breath and focus more on the sensations you're feeling. Guide his hand (or mouth) toward your clit area. You don't have to tell him flat out, "stimulate my clit." Just guide him in that direction - he should get the point. If he's doing something that feels good in particular, let him know (tell him, or give off a few "mms," or "aahhhs"), and let him keep doing that for a while (usually staying in that one feel-good area works best). Don't pressure yourself. And stop faking it, because he'll learn some bad habits (e.i. he'll keep on doing whatever he's doing because he thinks you like it, but alas, you still won't be getting off). Good luck, and be safe.

keeping contact with him will only make things more difficult for him, because in the back of his mind, he'll think, "there's always hope." you'll be basically setting him up for disappointment if you keep contact with him. do him a favor, and cut off ties.

Write down what your most important *priorities* are in different areas of your life: Job Home life Health / Body Relationships Education And whatever else . . . Write down the most important goal(s) for each, and then break them down into mini-goals, or the parts of each huge goal. Like steps in acheiving those goals. Then approach those goals in a step-by-step fashion. Just an idea. Don't overwhelm yourself, you remind me of myself. I put too much on my plate, so to speak, and I wind up going crazy trying to keep up with everything. You gotta relax. Deal with the most important things first, and bite off only what you CAN chew. Or else, as I'm sure you know, you'll get burnt out-- fast.

You should see my boyfriend when I want him to have sex wtih me at my house (when my parents are upstairs)! He gets so nervous about being caught, that half the times, the sex either doesn't happen, or I come and he doesn't, or whatever. It's usually not that great, and yes, it is because of his anxiety over getting caught. When we have sex at HIS house, or anywhere else we're guaranteed to NOT get caught, he is fine, and sex is always successful... lol As for her saying "Is there anything I can do for you?" Well, I'm gonna get a little deep with this one, now. Maybe her saying that made YOU think that SHE was acting cheap and way too easy and available. Did you feel like she was acting like a prostitute, or something? Or that she was only there to get you off? I'm not saying that you really thought she was a prostitute, but it might have given you a vibe that her sole purpose was to get you off, and it all came too easy for you. Did you wonder: Where's the challenge? Isn't sex supposed to be a matter of give-and-take? Did her comment make YOU feel cheap? As if all you wanted was for HER to do things to you (when that wasn't the actual case)? I can see how her comment can be a turn-off. And probably that, combined with your anxiety over getting caught, made your member quite sad. Don't worry about it-- it happens sometimes. Your issue probably wasn't a physical cause, but more of a psychological/mental cause. With regards to the future, maybe you should avoid sex in public places, or other places where you risk getting caught. Also, you need to somehow let your girl know that you do not share her mentality (i.e. she's there to do sexual things to you, and she's not expecting much in return). Good luck, man. And remember, these are all of my opinions!

OK, I'm not going to criticize you, and I'm not going to attemp to analyze your reasons for not liking the teddy bear. I'm just going to tell you how you might be able to prevent this from happening in the future. I've gotten some bad gifts from my boyfriend in the past-- and complaining about them is not the smooth way to handle things. It only makes them feel bad and resentful. Next time, it might be wise to just tell her something like, "I saw this really nice sweater at (name of store) . . ." and then tell her what it looked like, or even go there and show her. You can even ask her for a gift card. You can even go out Christmas shopping (for each other) TOGETHER. Regardless of what you do next Christmas or birthday, you have to somehow let her know what you want. Don't leave all of the decisions up to her. My boyfriend and I like to tell each other what we want for Christmas. We spend so much money on each other, that we want to make sure that our money is wisely spent. And that we don't get each other gifts that we will not use or like. I mean, we don't tell each other all of the things we want, and yes, there are some surprieses. But for the main gifts, we just tell each other what we want. How long have you been with her for? Maybe she just doesn't know yet what you're into, and what gifts you'd particularly like? (PS: I can understand how she made you feel like a little boy as opposed to a man. From my studies on the male species, I've encountered lots of claims that men love to be treated like men, not children. Cool, I'm seeing theory in practice.)

Because he wasn't in the mood to argue with you at the time. That could be why he didn't mention anything. The gifts sound pretty lame, and completely impersonal -- and, as the other poster said, I wouldn't worry. They're not gifts you'd give to someone you're "into." If you make a big stink about this, it'll do more harm than good. If you try to get him to cut off all ties with her, he *might* want to interact with her MORE. (Men are weird like that . . . sorry guys lol)

Well, she's supposed to take it every day at the exact same time ALWAYS . . . not just during the time it takes her body used to being on the pill. I wouldn't worry, as long as she's taking it when she's supposed to.

Don't go in those tanning beds. I've known 2 people who got melanoma (skin cancer) from it. One was a 17-yr. old girl, the other was a 40-something yr. old man. Why don't you just get a spray tan? Or buy the at-home spray tans? L'Oreal makes a good spray-tanner, no streaks, and it doesn't make you look orange. Good luck. PS: You don't want to look radio-active . . . making it obvious that you use self-tanner (or even that you go to tanning beds) will get you that unwanted attention. Be subtle about it- don't go overboard.

Sounds like schizophrenia to me....

How are we supposed to know what you might like doing? That's crazy. However, I would NOT put on the survey that you'd be interested in doing hair. The universities wouldn't need or want you to be a student at their institution if you're going to drop out to go to beauty school.

Usually, people don't want to talk to certain people because they (certain people) are ususally very quiet, and seem to be very disinterested in the job. Not saying that's how you are, I really have no idea, but have you considered the vibe that you might be giving off? Also, you're new. It will take some time before you "get in" with a little group.

Well, no offense, but when you procrastinate, things always get worse. Last weekend I spent hours writing a (what would in the end become) a 22- page paper for graduate school. I was literally stuck to my computer from Friday evening until Sunday night. At that same time, I had another assignment due for another class. It was crazy, and I know the stress you're feeling. Just do what you gotta do, you'll finish everything. This won't last forever. Next time, get started with studying and writing papers a few days in advance. You need to practice self-discipline (e.g. start on an assignment, or start studying enough time in advance so that you're not left with everything in the end).

I'd rather do without the extra calories and sugar. I hate drinking calories, what a waste.

Take the job in the Bay area, where you are now. If they decide to keep you, you can have a part time job when school starts up again. But . . . if money is a big issue, I'd say go back home and make some money for a month. Good luck in making your decision.

What you do for one, you must do for all. If you keep letting this girl get away with sleeping at her boyfriend's house, then coming in late the next day (even if she works later and makes up all the work) . . . everyone else is going to expect you to bend to their every (personal) need. She has to realize that if she wants to keep this job, then she's going to have to commit to it. I'd like to sleep late 1 day a week and go to work late . . . but I am more conscious of the impression that I make on my bosses. This girl obviously doesn't give a sh--. IMO... bend the rules a bit when someone's mother is dying, or when someone has a flat tire, or when someone's hot water heater floods the house. You need to draw the line between what people "need" to do (e.g. come in late to work because of a doctor's appointment), and what people simply "want" to do (e.g. come in late to work because someone wanted to sleeep in at her boyfriend's house."

The right thing to do is to give 2 weeks notice, at a minimum. Tell them in person that you are resigning, and explain your reasons to them. You don't HAVE to give them your reasons, but if you go about it the right way, they might not put you through hell for the next 2 weeks. Plus, maybe they can do something for you that'll make your job more appealing (i.e. different tasks). Bring a formal letter with you, too, when you do tell them. Another added benefit of giving at least 2 weeks notice: Future potential employers will call them for a reference-- you don't want to look like a jerk! Just keep your own interests and needs in mind. They are #1.